


This is who I am

by KonElDanvers



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: A little different, Agentreigncop, Alex is an idiot, Cat Knows, Coming Out, Depression, F/F, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending?, LGBTQ Character, LGBTQ Themes, Multi, Pain, Possible Character Death, References to Depression, Sanvers - Freeform, Suffering, SuperCorp, Trans Female Character, Trans Male Character, haha - Freeform, trigger warning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-22
Updated: 2020-07-17
Packaged: 2021-03-03 04:55:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 42
Words: 48,083
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24319171
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KonElDanvers/pseuds/KonElDanvers
Summary: Kara Danvers was a lot of things.An Alien, a reporter, a sister, a friend etc.Her friends would decribe her as lovely, smart and strong.But sometimes she gets the feeling that she`s not really being herself.That she`s just trying to play her partAnd suddenly she questions everything. Will her friends be able to help her?
Relationships: Alex Danvers & Kara Danvers, Alex Danvers/Maggie Sawyer, Eliza Danvers/Cat Grant, Kara Danvers & Cat Grant, Kara Danvers & Maggie Sawyer, Kara Danvers & Nia Nal, Kara Danvers & Querl Dox, Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor, Querl Dox/Nia Nal, Samantha "Sam" Arias/Alex Danvers/Maggie Sawyer
Comments: 663
Kudos: 555





	1. Feeling off

Kara Danvers never thought of herself as special. Sure, she was an alien and she saved the city on a daily basis but that wasn`t enough to discribe her as something she wasn`t.

The young woman had everything a person could wish for.  
She had friends, a loving family and a good paying job which she actually had fun doing. 

And still, she felt off. 

That feeling had been there since forever. It hadn`t just begin to exist when she arrived on earth, but instead she always felt like she was an outsider.  
Someone who could look inside but never break the walls to join the other people.  
And that scared her. Kara had always surpressed that feeling. It reminded her of being caged into a small space.  
When this feeling took over, she felt like she couldn`t breath, like she could never break out. 

But the blonde managed.  
It was difficult but something she could deal with. 

Untill one day it stopped being easy.  
Untill the day that these feelings evolved from a thought she had once a day to a hurricane of emotions that boiled on the inside, that were slowly burning all of her good thoughts and instead started turning them against her. 

And it was scary. 

Because Kara Danvers wasn`t ready to confront these emotions.  
She didn`t even want to think about them.  
But deep inside, the alien knew that one day she would have to deal with it.  
But every day she pushed it down and told herself "Tomorrow!" But the next day would come and it would go on to be the exact same procedure. 

And then, unexpectedly Kara meet Nia Nal.  
Nia Nal was a young woman who wanted to be a reporter. She was bubbly, friendly and way to smart for her own good.  
But Kara liked the girl. She reminded her of herself.  
So the blonde took her under her wing. 

And then Nia told Kara, that she was trans. 

A woman, born in a mans body.  
Kara had no problem with it. Why would she? Her sister was a lesbian and the most people she interacted with on a daily basis were queer as Kara slowly realized.  
That wasn`t what bothered her.  
Instead, Kara felt a jealousy she never even knew she had.  
And the blonde didn`t know why. 

She just knew that it fascinated her but also did dig out something deeper. But still she refused to confront these emotions. 

Over the next few months, Kara started to realize that she wasn`t comfortable.  
She didn`t like the dresses that she wore. The reporter had never felt good wearing them, but now? 

Now it was like they slowly were suffocating her. 

So she stopped wearing them. Instead she went back to the button ups and a jeans combined with a belt she had worn before she had become a succesfull reporter.  
It made her feel better. For two weeks or so, the thoughts did die down. And she felt at peace, untill she didn`t.  
She now started to realize what had caused those feelings and still she was to scared to admitt it, affraid of what could follow up. 

.......................

Nia was standing in front of a youth groupe.  
The were at the lgbt-center in National city. Nia was supossed to give a speach here and the superfriends had agreed to come along.  
The friends were seated in the audiance and looked up to the young woman. 

"It feels like you aren`t being yourself. It`s a feeling that something is wrong, that you have no controll. It`s a feeling of hiding something deep inside."  
The reporter paused.  
"I started having this feeling at a young age but as a kid, you can`t point your finger at it and say `that`s what`s wrong`, because you truly don`t know what`s wrong.  
It wasn`t untill I was 12 that I realized.  
That I finally admitted to myself why I didn`t feel like myself. Why I disliked the thought of growing up so much. It was because I wasn`t myself and I didn`t want to grow up not being me. So I told my parents and they agreed. And two years later, I was sitting in the doctors office. That was the day I started estrogen. It was the best day of my life. Because I finally was truly becoming me." 

Nia paused again. she gazed up and down the audiance. 

"Some of us realize who we are at a young age. Some of us take longer.  
It doesn`t matter how old you are when you realize. You could be seven, thirteen, twenty-five or even eighty.  
It`s never to late to realize who you are! But it takes a lot of strenth to be yourself. Everyone who was or is on this journey knows that.  
The world can be a cruel place and some of us are scared to be true. But we have to realize, if we don`t fight to be ourselfs, no one else is going to do it for us!" 

Nia soothed the folds on her dress. Than she continued. 

"And that`s why we have to keep on fighting! That`s why we need to educate! That`s why we need people to speak up, even if it`s scary!  
And I can`t say how proud I am of everyone in this comunity who had the strength to break out and to be themself!" 

Nia stepped down from the stage and the audiance started to applaud.  
Alex way nodding with a proud grin and Maggie was whooing her friend.  
Lena was laughing with a sparkle in her eyes and giving Nia a thumbs up. 

And Kara?  
Kara wanted to smile.  
She wanted to nodd proudly. 

But she couldn`t. 

Her head was spinning and it felt like the walls were closing in on her.  
She had to get out of here.


	2. To talk to someone

But Kara stayed. She stayed and watched Nia talk to the children.  
She saw her giving them the assurance they needed.  
Alex, who was standing t´next to the blonde reporter smiled. "You can be really proud of her!" 

Kara nodded. 

"This speech is really going to give some of these kids hope. It`s great to see someone help them!" 

Kara nodded again. 

Her throat was dried out. The red head went and stood along her friend, also helping the teenagers. Kara watched them with mixed feelings.  
She wanted to do something like that too. She wanted to stand along Nia, Alex and Maggie and give the kids comfort but she knew that it was wrong.  
That at the moment she had no place there. 

The hero felt someone grabbing her hand. As she looked down, Lena was leaning against her. 

The brunette was wearing a jeans with a blouse. Kara knew that Lena always thought that she looked underdressed but the blonde thought the she was the most beautyfull person in the world.  
"You seem a little lost.", Lena noticed.  
"I`m good." 

The brunette shook her head and looked at the horde of kids sourrounding their friends. "For some reason I don`t really believe you."  
Her fingers were drawing calming lines among Karas skin. "  
You were a little unfocused for the last few months. You know that you can always talk to me?"  
Kara tensed up. "I`m just really busy with supegirl work..." She was sure that Lena didn`t buy that as an excuse but instead of starting to dig deeper like Alex would have, she took a step closer to Kara and gave her a little kiss.  
The blonde could see that the other woman was worried but she just couldn`t. In this moment she heard someone screaming.  
Her hands formed fists and her eyebrows were drawn together.  
"Supergirl busines?", Lena asked.  
Kara confirmed this with a litttle smile.  
"Go get them tiger!"

Two hours later Kara was flying through the city.  
She had to break up a Bank robbery and then later had to fight an alien who had gotten to drunk in a bar.  
Alltogether it had been a productive day. The blonde didn`t want to go home. Not that she didn`t love Lena and loved spending time with her but her head was to crowded. The voice was screaming again and she felt sick. Alltogether: no condition to bother her girlfriend with. 

She tried to clean her head.  
Let her thoughts wander to what could have caused this tumult. At first she found nothing. Which of course, didn`t make sense. And then she let her thoughts go on to the speech Nia had given. Once again her emotions started to boil up.  
The jealousy had come back. She went through all of the things Nia said. That you had to be strong to be yourself. 

She was that, right?  
She was pretty open about being an alien. Not as Kara Danvers but as supergirl.  
And she was also very open about being pansexual. She had never hidden that fact.  
But why did it feel like there was something else? Something she couldn`t quiete wrap her head around. 

Kara hadn`t noticed that she had landed on the Catco balcony. Her thoughts were to loud to let her realize that.  
But someone else did. 

"Supergirl?", a female voice asked.  
Kara startled. "What?" Onto the balcony stepped no one other than Cat Grant.  
Kara smiled. Her boss was back. 

She didn`t know for how long but at least she was here. Something that the blonde would never dare to tell James but the older woman was a way better boss than him.  
"What are you doing here?", Kara asked.  
"Well, it`s my company Keira!" She took in the figure of her employe. She raised an eyebrow. Something was off. 

"What`s going with You? If I read the articles correctly, you should be home with the young Luthor right now..." Cat paused. "Unless she kicked you out.. If she did that not only would I want the rights to that interview but I`ll also beat her ass." 

Kara let out a laugh. She had missed that. 

"No, Lena and I are still going strong!" Cat nodded. "And how come that you are here and not at home. Watching a horrible romcom I assume?"  
The hero let her gaze wander. It stopped at the L-Corp tower in the centre of the city.  
"To be honest I don`t know." 

The CEO stepped closer. "I doubt that. We do everything for a reason! What is yours?"  
Kara felt like the other woman was x-raying her.  
She gulped. "My thoughts are to loud."

"And how is that?" 

The blonde shrugged. "I`m not sure. It started a few months ago. My thoughts just started screaming at me. And my emotions were starting to boil as if there was something I had to realize."  
Cat leaned on the barrier of the balcony and looked upon the stars. "And what is bringing you here tonight?" 

"It`s just easier to think up here." 

Cat nodded. "But why did you loose it today?"  
Kara stuttered. "II- I didn`t loose it!" The CEO just started at her. "Okay- I did."

"But why?"

Kara took a second. She needed to think.  
She bit her lip. "We were at the lgbt-center today." Cat didn`t say anything. Instead gestured her to continue.  
"Nia gave a speech and me and some friends were there to support her. And it was great! Nia is an excellent speaker! She really capured everythig and everyone."  
Kara manged to grin proudly. 

"But?", Cat asked. 

Kara had to take a deep breath. "While listening to her, I felt... Jealous." 

Karas face was drawn together and her jaw muscles were tight up.  
Alltogether Cat noticed that the superhero wasn`t very confident.  
Instead she seemed to be hiding.  
Not a secret but herself! It was as if she was trying to show as little of herself as possible. 

"And why do you think did you have those feelings?" 

Kara now had to hold back tears. "I- I don`t know." Cat stepped closer to her.  
She put a hand onto her shoulder. "I nocticed that you changed your style! Why that? Those dresses looked good on you." 

Kara shook her head. "They felt wrong. They just felt wrong. I felt to vulnerable. Like it was showing something I didn`t want to show." 

Cat nodded. "I am not saying that I am right, but Kara?"  
The younger one looked up. Some tears actually had managed to escape the heros eyes. The blue in them was shiny and so confused.  
"Could it be that you were jealuse because you wish that you could be like Nia Nall? That you could the thing she did?"  
Kara took a breath. She was shaky. Instead of answering she longed forward and grabbed Cat.  
The CEO was confused when she was buried into a hug but she just held the blonde tight.  
Cat knew that this couldn`t be easy. 

She just hoped that Kara would be strong enough.


	3. Another day

The next day came to quickly. Kara hadn`t flown home and had instead spend the night on the couch in Miss Grants office. 

It was five in the morning and the blonde was staring at the cealing. Through the big windows she was able to see that the sun was rising and was tinching the dark sky into a lighter blue.   
But she could still see some stars, that would vanishe within the next few minutes. 

Kara had one hand resting on the sofa, the other one on her chest.   
As if it was controlling her abilty to breath. 

The last night had been draining. 

The realisations she had made were in her mind and like claws they were scraping at her heart. Karas head was hurting.  
After the talk with Miss Grant the hero hadn`t been able to sleep. 

Cat basecelly had to push her onto the couch and threat her to tie her up against it. Kara stood up. The blonde noticed that Cat was sitting at her desk and was looking through some files. 

Had she stayed the night too?

Probably, but that wasn`t the point. Kara soothed the fabric of her supergirl skirt and than stepped in front of the CEO.   
"You are awake?", Cat asked. The blonde nodded.   
"How are you?"  
Kara didn`t know how to answer that. 

Her thoughts still hadn`t calmed down and her emotions were still at an all time high.   
She shrugged. 

Cat gestured her to stepp closer.   
The CEO took a close look at the hero. The alien looked tired. Dark circles under her eyes, the long blonde hair messed up and her posture hunched. 

"I want you to go home!", Cat said. 

It wasn`t a request. It was an order. "Miss Grant-" The CEO didn`t let her speak. "No, Kara! Go home!" 

Kara turned around. "This isn`t a punishement! I want to give you time to think! After last night you surely need it."   
The alien nodded, still not in a good mood. She wanted to work but at the same time she knew that her boss was right.

"Okay."

"Kara?", Cat said. The blonde turned around. Her mentor was watching her with a concerned look she had never really seen before.   
"I know that this is hard. And that any realisation you might come to is going to change things. But-", the CEO stood up. She grabbed Kara by her shoulders.   
"I want you to know, that it won`t be wrong! That you still will be you and that, no matter what, you will have my support!" 

Kara forced herself to smile. "But what if I am wrong?" 

"Even than, You will be okay! Take your time! I will give you some free days. As I know you haven`t really used the ones we give you."   
The CEO grinned.   
"Again Kara, you will be fine!"

The blode nodded and walked up to the balcony.   
She would actually take some time off. She had to finally confront those feelings.  
She wasn`t happy about it but it had to be done.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so... a new chapter.  
> I hope you like it. It`s pretty short bc I still have homework and I have some medical problems I have to deal with.  
> If anyone has an idea what a horrible headache, dizziness and facial pain could mean, please tell me!  
> I`ve been going to the doctor for 6 months and we still don`t know...  
> Last night honestly was horrible. Woke up at 4 in the moorning and it was the worst pain untill know. I just wanted to bang my head against the wall!  
> (and no, not a migraine)  
> Anyway, I hope you liked the chapter!


	4. Where is she?

"Where is Kara?"  
Lena was storming into the controll room of the DEO.  
"Lena?", Alex asked in confusion.  
"Don`t `Lena`me! Where the fuck is Kara?"  
The director tilted her head. "She isn`t with you?" The brunette shook her head. "Do you not know where she is eather?"  
Alex nodded. "I thought she was with you... you two practically live together!"  
"Well, she isn`t. In fact I haven`t seen her since yesterday evening. I was hoping that the DEO maybe send her on a mission." 

The red head waryd.  
"So. If she isn`t with you and I don`t know where is eather, than where could she possibly be?" 

Lena didn`t know the answer to that. 

At least one of the two always knew where Kara was.  
"Maybe she just took a day off?", Alex offered. The brunette looked at her friend. 

They both knew that that couldn`t be it. Kara never just "took a day off". Least of all without telling anyone.  
Had the blonde maybe been kidnapped? Wouldn`t be the first time. 

Both Kara and Lena were walking targets and something bad happened to them at least once a week. 

Alex had watched her thoughtfully.  
"Don`t overthink it! It`s probably nothing." Lena nodded.  
But something didn`t fit right with the explanation of Kara just taking a day off without telling anyone.  
It just wasn`t Kara-isch. 

But the brunette decided that she would let the kryptonian take her time. Lena had noticed that over the last few month the behavior of the blonde had changed quite a bit.  
Not in the way that she wasn`t kind as always.  
And she still smiled like the golden retriever puppy she was, but it didn`t seem to be as truthfull as it used to be. 

More like a mask. 

Not that anybody had noticed it. Lena herself hadn`t really.  
But there had been other changes. The blonde had started to not be as attentive. 

Some times she would just stare into a space and only Lena talking to her would bring her back. There also had been a change in the bedroom.  
While they always had been quite active (Alex would kill Lena if she ever found out about the stuff that they did and after that she would try to burn her brain) but lately?  
They hadn`t been doing anything. Kara always said that she way to tired. 

And Lena wouldn`t say anything against that. She loved the blonde and she was supergirl.  
And Supergirl had a stressfull job. It seemed sincear. But Kara slowly had started to push her out. Not in a way that they would fight a lot, but in a way that would cut Lena off from the thoughts of her girlfriend. 

The brunette noticed that she didn`t really know what the blonde was thinking anymore- and she had always known that. Kara was like an open book.  
But now?  
Now the letters in that book were written in code and Lena didn`t know the key. 

The change in clothing also hadn`t gone unnoticed. It was more like the Kara she had first meet.  
The day Kara decided to cut out the dresses Lena didn`t complain.  
Why the hell would she?  
Kara wearing a button up and one of her brown belts (Alex would be chasing her for weeks if she knew the fantasys Lena had about that) would always be worth the view but she wondered why.  
Kara had said that she just tried to wear dresses for some time and it just didn`t work for her. 

And that was a good reason- right? 

Lena took a deep breath. She most likely was just interpreting things into the situation. Kara only had taken off one day!  
There was nothing wrong with that. It was a little concerning that Kara hadn`t come to her appartement yesterday but that was also explainable.  
She had a rough day! She probably just wanted to sleep.  
Yes!  
That was the reason! Kara just got overworked as supergirl and that was the reason she got tired so much.  
But that was something that she could help with!  
The moment Kara came back, Lena would talk to her and they would take a hollyday.  
Maybe they could fly to greece or italy.  
Maybe even france. 

Kara was sitting on a cliff in front of the ocean.  
The blonde had been staring at the waves for some time now.  
The salty water was rising up to her nose and her hair was blowing in the wind.  
Untill now Kara hadn`t really come to an result. She knew that she didn`t feel good about herself. She knew that there was something wrong. But Kara wasn`t sure if....

Could Cat be right?  
Could Kara want to be like Nia? She had never really liked to be girly.  
She had never really liked dresses and when she first arrived on earth, she didn`t.  
But they lived in a small town and after being called "Dyke" by one of the jocks. She was scared that she didn`t fit in.  
So she started wearing sun dresses. 

Did she like her hair? She was proud how healthy it was... But it was really inpractical and more than once she thought about cutting it.  
It also did fit the estatic of the pretty, small town girl.  
But sometimes Kara would imagine what she would looked like with short hair. She always was rather interested in looking like a disney prince than a princess.  
The short hair would make her jaw seem stronger. A little more edgy. And she would really like that. 

But did she want to be a man?  
Did she? How the fuck had Nia figured this out?  
Should she aske her?  
Because this was diffecult!  
Kara burried her face in her hands.  
How the fuck was she supossed to do this?


	5. To tell someone

Kara crashed down on the Catco balcony.  
It was around 4 o`clock and in the office was still full of people.

"Supergirl? What are you doing here?", Cat asked as she stepped out onto the balcony. "I thought today was your free day."  
Kara flinched. Cat didn`t seem to happy about this. 

"I just wanted to ask if I could talk to Nia." 

This sentence was a diffecult one. Kara had decided that she needed to talk to someone who had done this.  
The blonde CEO didn`t change her mimic. Instead she just went in, graped Nia, while she wa talking to Snapper, and brought her to the superhero. 

"What the hell is going on?", Nia wispert, the confusion showing clearly on her face.  
"The CW-Hero wannabe wants to talk to you.", Cat explained with a harsh voice.  
"Did I do something wrong?", the young woman still seemed a bit scared and her gaze flipped over to a smiling Kara. 

"Thank you Cat." 

"It`s still Miss Grant for you!" 

She giggled. Yeah, her boss maybe way a bad bitch but Kara wouldn`t change that for a day.  
"And Keira?", the CEO said.  
"Yes?"  
"Good luck."

Kara had flown Nia and herself over to her flat. When they landed, Nia asked: "Okay, what is going on?"  
Kara had been confident. In diffference to that she was now fiddeling with her hands and biting her lip. 

Nia noticed: Kara was scared. And what in the world could ever scare Supergirl?  
"Ähm... How about you sit down and I go and change and than we can talk properly."  
The beaming smile that the blonde gave her seemed to be unstable and there was no sparkle in the eyes of the older reporter.  
Nia nodded.

Kara was standing in her bedroom.  
She looked into the mirror and a young woman stared back at her.  
The long hair was bound into a ponytail and she wore a jeans and a hoodie. 

Kara could have changed within seconds. 

One of her superpwers still was superspeed but she needed a minute. Her heart was beating fast in her chest. It wouldn`t be a surprise if Nia could hear it from the living room. 

"You can do this Danvers!" 

She went back into the living room.  
Nia had made herself at home on the couch and was looking smilingly at the wall full of pictures.  
"Hey.", Kara greeted her nervously and the brunette watched her with interested eyes.  
It was silent between them. It was uncomfortable because even though Kara had made a plan, if she now said this, that would definitely change things. 

And did Kara want things to change? 

Life had been pretty good! She was a hero, a reporter and she had great friends and a amazing girlfriend. Couldn`t she just... live with that?  
Why would she want more?  
And than she remembered the feelings she had.  
Those feelings that were threatening her everyday.  
And that Kara knew that she had to do this. If she didn`t do this now, she would probably never do it. 

"Nia?" The brunette looked at her, now with concerne.  
"How did you know you were trans?" 

Nia smiled.  
"Well, I always had this feeling. Just that everyone else always knew where they belonged and I didn`t.  
When my sister and I were five we had a costume party at school. She dressed up as a princesse and I was pirate.", she smiled at the memory. 

"On the party I spilled juice onto my costume and they said that I would have to change. They only had one other costume and it was the one of another princesse.  
And it just felt right.  
It didn`t feel weird to wear it. Butt two other kids didn`t think so. So they started to make fun of me.  
And than this boy came up to me. He was dressed as a knight and he stood in front of the boys and said `If you want to hurt the princesse, you will have to go through me!" 

Nia was lost in her memory. 

"And than he turned around and he said `I think that you are the prettiest princesse here!`and it just felt so right. He gave me the nickname princesse after.  
He was my knight and I was his princesse. All the others thought it was weird that he called me that.  
But it was the only thing that felt right for me."  
She paused and looked at Kara who was smiling at the premisse of the story. 

"He seems nice." 

"He was. But in fourth grade he moved away... And after that I was bullied. That wasn`t very nice. But it was the first thing that kinda made me realize.  
I didn`t understand it but when I was twelve I remembered it and it was scary.  
But I figured it out and I couldn`t be happier." 

Kara nodded.  
Her eyebrows were drawn together. 

"But why are you asking?" 

The blonde didn`t look at Nia.  
And forming the words was diffecult. Her heart was beating fast and Kara felt like she was going to throw up. 

"I think I might be trans."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More Nia because I love Nia and we need to see more of her!  
> Have a great day:)


	6. Everything`s better with icecream

Kara was nervously fiddeling with her hands. She looked down, trying to not look Nia into the eyes.   
She felt sick.   
Karas heart was beating fast, as if it was trying to jump out of her chest. 

"Wait, what?"   
Not the response that the blonde had aspected. Kara ran a hand through her hair.   
"Are you serious?" The blonde nodded. "I am not sure!", she tried to explain. "It`s just that I had this feelings. Thise feeling of not fitting in... For a while." 

Nia was silent. Rather of saying something she was listening. 

"At first I thought it was because I`m an alien but it`s not. And I just need to talk to someone who knows what this feels like. Otherwise...." "Your head could explode?", Nia proposed.   
Kara nodded, glad that the younger woman understood.   
"So... What do you want me to do?"   
The blonde stared into the distance. "I was hoping you could help me be sure. But I don`t know how!"   
Nia tilted her head. "If you want to know how it would feel, I could use male pronouns for you. You would get an impression of what would be waiting for you..." 

Kara nodded.   
That sounded like a responsible idea.   
"Yeah, that sounds good." Nia was biting her lip, lost in a thought.   
"I guess you don`t have an idea for a name?"   
The blonde nodded.   
"It could be easier if I just use your last name untill you have an idea." 

Kara nodded again.  
"Nia?"   
The brunette looked into the blue eyes.   
"Yes?"   
"Could I have a hug?" 

Nia smiled. "Of course Danvers!"   
When the brunette hugged her, for the first time the superhero felt like he could be fine.   
He knew that there still was a lot to figure out, but this was a great first step. 

Nia had dragged the blond to the mall.   
"After that much of an emotional day, you gotta eat some icecream!" Danvers had laughed in agreement.   
Now the two were sitting in a Coffee place, Nia eating her chocolate icecream while Danvers was eating his strawberrie-cherrie mix. 

They were talking about work. Making fun of Alexs inabilaty to loose at game-night and Lenas obsession to know everyones Hogwarts house.   
They were laughing freely and Danvers face muscles weren`t in a face clench for the first time in quite some time.   
Both the reporters didn`t realize Alex and Lena walking through the mall. 

Alex had realized that Lena still wasn`t convinced so she decided to get the brunette out of her office.   
It was easier than she had imagined it.   
Now the two friends were standing in the middle of the mall, wanting to shop for Lenas next gala. That`s something that they had started doing together about a year ago.   
Because back than Kara just wore whatever dress they had given her and now most of the time Kara went shopping with Maggie, who matched Karas style a little more. 

"When we`re done here, do you want to get some icecream?", the readhead asked.   
"You and your sister are really trying to get me to eat unhealthy stuff. Aren`t you?"   
Alex laughed.   
"Not funny! If it goes on like this I`ll have to go to the gym on a daily!" But Lena considered the option. "It`s pretty bussy today. We should check out the coffe place before!" 

Alex agreed and they walked over to the shop which was painted in yellow colours.   
Onto the side of the malls were open windows.   
Lena looked inside and took in how many people were sitting there.   
There was a elderly couple, a young family, a couple on a date and so on. "I don`t think we`ll find a place here!" Alex was lookig through the glass next to her.   
A moment after Alexs eyes went wide. 

"Wait, look in there!" Lena did as she said.   
Everything the same as before.   
"What`s there to see?" 

"Don`t you see them?", Alex said, pointing her finger at what Lena thought was a young couple on a date.   
As she looked closer now she started seing similarities.   
Was that Nia?   
And opposite her... KARA? 

The blonde was wearing a baggie shirt and a jeans which seemed to have been washed a little to often.   
Kara had put her hair up in a ponytail. What startled Lena wasn`t that her girlfriend was there. Nia and the reporter were good friends.   
What made her stop was the way that Kara was laughing and smiling. 

Lena hadn`t seen her this freely in months.   
She had thought that something was wrong before but now? Now she had the evidence.   
"She seems... happy.", Alex said, sounding a bit surprised.   
So at least Lena wasn`t the only one who realized.   
"Do you think we should go in?" 

Lena shook her head. "No. I don`t know what`s going on but Kara will tell us!"   
"I hope that you`re right."

"So Danvers, what`s up next?"   
The blond smiled. "I saw a Hair salon on our way here."   
Nia opened her mouth in surprise. "Do you want to...?"   
"Yeah. It`s time.", the hero laughed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, if you want to request names for Kara, I`ll gladly go with that. Because I really don`t know what to chose!  
> Have a great day;)


	7. Cut it off

"Alex is probably going to kill me!", Danvers said, sitting on a blue leather chair in the corner of a hair salon.  
Nia was sitting next to him, taking a closer look at a magazine. 

"Ed Sheeran has a affair with Elton John?", she murmered.  
The blond grinned. "Don`t trust every magazine, Nia! Not everyone can report the news as good as Catco does."  
Nia raised an eyebrow. "Yes. We truly are amazing." She gazed upon a list of different hairstyles, hanging upon the wall.  
"What kind of hairstyle do you want?" Danvers bit his lip.  
He took in the different options. 

There was a picture of Zac Effron, not with his now shorter cut but with the Troy Bolton bowl cut.  
There were multiple pictures of different celeberitys with fades.  
All in all, he was given many optionws and he had no idea how to really chose one. 

"Oh, how about this one!", Nia exclaimed in excitement.  
The blond looked at the picture the brunette was pointing at and laughed. 

"Justin Bieber? Really?"  
"What? I was a big fan."  
The superhero let out a giggle.  
"You were a Belieber?"  
"Shut up Danvers!", Nia just pouted. 

"Hello.", a voice greeted them.  
A woman, that looked like she was in her 40s had showed up next to Danvers chair.  
"Hi!", the two reporters said back.  
"What can I do for a lovely lady as you today? Maybe we could curl your hair? Our maybe trim a little bit? Just tell me!"

The superhero flinched. This wasn`t really what he had wanted to hear and his heart was cleanching.  
Should he correct her?  
Should he out himself?  
Was it save? 

This woman worked in a hair salon... she must have worked with many different types of people.  
On the other hand the blonde noticed a chain with a cross. He probably shouldn`t.  
Being religious didn`t equal being against lgbt but the chances dubbled.  
He had to deal with homophobes multiple times during his time as supergirl and it wasn`t really something that he wanted to deal with during his daily life. 

He had spaced out, because Nia was now talking to the woman.  
"-but that`s total bullshit!", the woman said, pointing at the magazine. "That`s no quality reporting!" 

"Ähm, sorry to bother.... But I came here for a haircut?"  
The hair stylist turned araound.  
"Of course sweetie. So? What do you want?"  
Danvers looked at the pictures again.  
Than he made a desicion.  
"This!"

The woman had looked a little shocked an she seemed like she would try to get Danvers to keep "her long, golden and all around beautyfull hair", but a angry look by Nia and she was snipping in quite.  
The two reporters stepped out of the salon and onto the streets.  
"How do I look?", Danvers asked.  
"Fabulues!" 

The blond smiled and ran a hand through his hair.  
It was short- really short.  
The sides were cut into a fade and on top they had left it longer. Long enough to do a hairflip, as the blond now realized.  
He grinned.  
"Exactly the look I was going for!"  
"And? Any plan to tell Alex? Or your wife?"  
The blond snorted. "We aren`t married!"  
"Not yet!", Nia sang.  
"And no, I don`t have a plan... I just hope that Alex isn`t going to kill me."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Btw, not every trans dude (Sounds cooler) is happy when he gets his first haircut!  
> A lot of us are but my first short cut looked so weird. And my Dad didn`t talk to me after for 2 weeks... He`s still mad bc I used to have like really, really long hair. But you can always alter it and you get used to it. And some ftm guys don`t cut their hair at all bc they liked it better that way! (And they look awesome!)  
> Anyway, have a great day;)


	8. Lena Luthor is speechless?

Lena was sitting on the couch in Maggies and Alex`s appartement.   
The three woman had just eaten some cake and now the shorter cop was teasing the redhead.   
"You are becoming soft Danvers!", she grinned. Alex turned her face into a grimace. "I am not!" "You so are! Lena-", Maggie drew the attention of the CEO on her.  
"Alex cried while we were watching Moulin Rouge yesterday!" 

Lena grinned. "Really? Alex, she`s right. You are getting soft!"   
The agent pouted. "It`s a very sad movie okay?"   
Lena and Maggie smiled at each other and just nodded.   
"Sure."   
"It really is!"   
Maggie was trying to keep herself from smiling.   
"Nobody said otherwise honey."   
Lena looked surprised. "Honey?", she mouthed over to the cop. She had never heard them use pet names.

"By the way, Maggie? Have you noticed anything... strange in Karas behavior?", Alex asked her wife.   
A crincle fromed between the cops eyebrows.   
"Why are you asking?"   
The redhead shot a glance to Lena. "Well, we may have noticed that Kara isn`t as Kara-ish as she used to be." 

Maggie nodded understandingly. "Yeah. She isn`t as huggie. The last time we had game night, she didn`t try to cuddle everyone in the room. Also you have been a little tense for months Lena. I guess it isn`t going well in the sheets, is it?"

Alex jumped off the couch.   
"Maggie! No!"   
The cop laughed.   
"What? I bet it`s true."   
Lena felt both of the other woman looking at her with a certein expectation in their eyes. 

In the end, Lena gave in. 

"No, she`s right. It hasn`t been going great."   
Maggie laughed a bit.   
"Well, at least I was right. Before that it was allways easy to tell when you two had done-" Alex interrupted her. "Don`t you dare! My sister is as pure as one could be! She isn`t doing the-", the readhead shuddered. "-The devils tango."   
Her wife snorted.   
"Devils tango? Really? What are you? Sixteen?"   
Lena grinned.   
"And Alex, I hate to destroy the image you have of Kara, but believe me, she may seem pure, but she really isn`t."   
While Alex had a disgusted look on her face, Maggie seemed interested.   
"Oh tell me everything!" "Well, that one time-"

Alex had started to ignore the other two.   
She loved her little sister, and they basecelly told each other everything, but there are some things, that you just don`t have to know.  
Alex looked up from her computer when she heard a knock at the door.   
While Maggie was yelling: "I KNEW LITTLE DANVERS IS A TOP!", Alex walked over to the door.   
With a sigh she opened it.   
In front of her stood Nia, smiling like a puppie.   
"Hi Alex!", she greeted the redhead and without waiting for any petition to come in, she just stepped into the apartement and let herself fall onto the couch.   
Alex raised an eyebrow.   
Nia really had to learn at least some manners.   
She turned back to the door, ready to close it, when she noticed someone standing there. It was Kara, but....

"OH MY GOD!"", she screamed. 

Her friends were now looking at the front door too. 

"WHAT DID YOU DO?", Alex yelled at her sister and took in the head of the blonde. 

What had happened to the shiny, golden locks? Someone had cut it. Who the fuck could have done this? Her sister surely hadn`t cut it. That couldn`t be possible!   
Kara now stepped into the flat.   
"Hey Alex.", she greated her while reaching up to her head to run a hand through her hair.   
"What did you do?", Alex asked again, now quiter. "Who did this? Did this happen during a fight?"   
Kara smiled. "I cut it."   
"But why would you do this?", The redhead asked again.   
"Your hair was beautyfull!" The blonde now looked a bit hurt and Alex regreted the said words in an instant.   
"I....-I just felt like it was time for something new."

Kara stepped forward and stopped in front of the sofa.   
"Hey guys.", she said.   
Maggie whistle. "Damn little Danvers! You for sure can rock this hairstyle!"   
Kara laughed. 

Alex smiled, that was why she loved Maggie. Always good to cheer people up.   
She still was a bit suspicious though.   
Had Kara really decided to just cut her hair?   
Kara now was looking at Lena.   
"Hey Lee.", she said nervously. 

The brunette didn`t answer. 

She was just staring at her girlfriend.   
Her eyes wide and her mouth open. "What do you think?"   
Nia closed Lenas mouth.   
"Lena, you have to talk. The thing you do when you move your jaw to make sounds, remember?" 

Maggie grinned. "I think she likes it."

Nia nodded smiling.

Lena slowly seem to switch back to reality.   
She gulped. "Kara?"   
The blonde seemed to flinch a bit, but no one other than Nia noticed, who send her friend a reasuring smile.   
"Yes?" Lena swallowed.   
How had her mouth become this dry? Was it hot in here?   
She looked back at her girlfriend who was now wearing a dark jeans, a brown belt and a white shirt with a leather jacket.   
She must had changed after Alex and she had seen her and Nia in the cafee.   
And it looked great.   
Like really great!   
Apart from that, the hair was what made Lenas brain stop working. She had no better words than to describe Kara as hot.   
She looked a bit like a jock who wouldn`t call you the next day but somehow she still managed to look cute and... like Kara. 

Danvers was looking at his girlfriend who had been specheless for quite some time now.   
"I think you broke her.", Maggie chuckled.   
Just in this moment, Lenas eyes became clear again.   
"You look-" she stopped.   
The blond was waiting nerously, his heart beating extremely fast.   
"-Hot!" Lena finished, her eyes looking up and down Danvers. 

The blond got a bit of his confidence back.   
"Yeah, it`s fabulous."   
Lena just nodded.   
Nia laughed. "How is she a genuis? She can´t even build a full sentence."   
Maggie was the one who answered.   
"No she is, but little Danvers shredded her brain. It wouldn`t surprise me if we had seen them for the last time for a few days. If you know what I mean." She wiggled her eyebrows. 

Alex had enough.  
"Okay, that`s enouth Maggie! How about we let these two leave to their own apartement so they can firgure this out."   
"Figure? I would have used another f-word but I guess that`s fine too."   
Nia highfived the cop.


	9. Dark thoughts come with the darkness of the night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I almost deleted the chapter after I wrote it.  
> Not because I wanted to, but because I am clumly as fuck and tapped on the wrong key.  
> Thankfully it saved.   
> I have no nerves to rewrite a chapter at the moment.  
> Anyway, have a great day:)

Danvers was laying in bed.  
While his girlfriend was cuddled onto his chest and quitly snoring, he was wide awake. 

He looked down at the peacefull face of the brunette.  
Her pink lips a little open, her cheeks a bit flushed.  
When Lena was sleeping, she looked younger than she did otherwise.  
She actually looked like the 26 year old that she was, not the stone cold CEO who had to fight against the world. 

The blond sighed. 

Should he tell her?  
The younger woman already had so much to carry. He didn`t want it to become more.  
That would be unfair. Danvers just wanted Lena to have the life she deserved.  
A life without pain. And he knew that Lena would probably do everything to help him.  
And that she would most likely question every of their interactions and ask if he had been comfortable with any of the signs of affections that she had shown him. 

When the blond had meet the Luthor, she was new in the city and alone.  
It took some time to get her to be friends with him. But after she had started to warm up, they became best friends.  
They laughed together and they were sad together.  
When Lena found out that her best friend was supergirl, she felt betrayed. 

And she had every right to feel that way. 

The blond had betrayed her, for sellfish reasons.  
The point of "I was trying to protect you!", had been long gone. It was because the superhero had been able to be himself, or that what he at the time thought was himself.  
It took time to get back on track.  
To fully earn each others trust again.  
Their first kiss had been after Supergirl had just won a fight, but not without getting himself injured.  
For two days he had been in a coma and when he woke up, Lena had rented to him about how he was an idiot who never thought of his own savety. 

When Lena had kissed him after, it wasn`t like the books described it, with canon balls and fireworks.  
But it felt warm. It felt save and it felt right.  
Danvers would later describe the kiss to Alex as home.  
That it was like coming home after a long day and finally being able to relax and not to worry about the rest of the world.  
The redhead had patted his back while Maggie was commenting in the backround how she had "always known" and "that they were two clueless gays". 

Their first real date had actually been on Alex and Maggies wedding day.  
The blond remembered that he felt like his heart was going to explode when he saw Lena laughing and smiling with the Danvers family and friends.  
That Lena finally seemed to have found peace somewhere.  
It had been a all around perfect day.

And now there was this new problem.  
And he wanted to tell Lena, but what IF she would see him differently?  
Or what if she would leave him? 

Those were options. 

The blond knew that Lena cosidered herself pansexual, but he still worried. What if she only wanted Kara?  
What if she didn`t want him? 

His chest was wa rising quickly, trying to fill his lungs with air when he felt like he was drowning in his thoughts.  
He was scared.  
Slowly he untied himself from Lenas body. The brunette was still sleeping and Danvers didn`t want to wake her up.  
The blond stood in front of the bed for a second and looked down, taking in the view of his love.  
He leaned down and gave her a kiss on the forhead while his fingers found the dark locks of her hair.  
"I love you!", he whispered and walked into the living room where he found a hoodie and a jeans laying.  
The blond changed into them to than walk to the window.  
It was foggy outside.  
Not one star to be seen, but it would do for him. He opened the window and flew off, once again needing time and space to think. 

Lena was stilll laying on the matresse.  
But her eyes were now open. She had noticed that her lover didn`t seem to be allright.  
She knew that something was wrong, that the blonde was trying to make sense of something.  
But she didn`t know what. She hoped that Kara would have the courage to just tell her.  
Lena wasn`t someone to judge others very quickly, she could understand a lot.

She sighed.

The brunette could only wait untill Kara would come back.  
And even when she did, the Luthor couldn`t be sure if the blonde would actually tell her something.  
It frustrated her.  
She just wanted to help the kryptonian.


	10. Helping the padawan

Cat was surprised to see Kara at work, just one day after she had given her holydays.   
She watched the blonde with a skeptical look on her face.   
The CEO was a bit shocked by the new haircut, so was every other employee at Catco.   
When Kara walked into the office this morning, by far more than one person had turned their head to look at the reporter. 

But it looked good on her. 

Cat actually could see some of the female employees staring at the blonde.   
Cat had walked by them and with one eyebrow raised asked, if they needed a cup of water, since they seemed to be thirsty.   
Cat usually wasn`t someone to bound with her employees but after she had made that comment, Nia who was seated across the group, had started to giggle immensely and while Cat walked past her to get back to her office, she actually gave the younger woman a high five. 

Kara was sitting at her desk, quietly writing a new article and not noticing anything of what had happened.   
Two days had gone by and the sudden interest of the “straight” female employees in Kara, still hadn`t calmed down.   
More than once Cat had to asked one of the woman, if she hadn`t just gotten married. 

The CEO sighed, if it was to go on like this, she would have to get Lena into the office to tell all of the woman, that Kara was hers and only hers.   
Cat knew that the partners of supers were… quite protective over their relationships.   
Louis had once stepped on the table of the daily planet to let everyone know that Clark was her boyfriend and everyone trying to make a move on him, would go him with one hand less. 

Cat had always wondered how Clark had this type of attraction to everyone.   
People seemed to be drawn to him. 

And Kara was the same. 

People loved her and since she was working at Catco, more than half of all employees had developed a crush on her.   
Now even the woman, who had in earlier stages of their career had stated to be as straight as a line, had joined in. Cat was pretty sure that the two kryptonians gave of some kind of pheromone.   
But both Clark and Kara were too naive to notice. They both thought that people were just being nice to them.   
And when they answered questions with smiled brighter than the sun, it didn`t help people to fall out of love. 

Gosh, soon they would have a Luthor defending her property.   
She groaned, that would be fun.

Cat looked back to the reporter who was chewing on the rubber part of her pencil.   
Cat had waited for Kara to tell her to what resolution she had come, but the super hadn`t approached her yet.   
Needed Cat to do everything on her own? 

She walked over to Karas desk. The reporter didn`t even look up at first, she was too busy challenging herself to find a better word for “school”.   
“Kiera?”, Cat asked.   
The blondes head jumped up. The CEO noticed that the kryptonian seemed to be on edge.   
“Something wrong?”, Kara asked, her eyes worried.   
Cat tilted her head. “Not in peticular.”   
She looked over to another part of the office where a horde of people was staring at them, wondering what the CEO could possibly want from Kara.   
“I was wondering if we could talk? In my office!”   
Kara nodded, unsure of what to expect. 

They went over to the separate room and Cat signed the blonde to sit down.   
“So… what is it you want to talk about?”   
Cat took a breath. “Two nights ago?”   
The reporters cheeks seemed to warm up. “Oh. Tha-that was nothing. Just a little crisis.” The kryptonian smiled unconvincingly. 

“It`s okay! Like I told you before, you have my full support!”   
Kara nodded again, avoiding Cats eyes.   
The CEO sighed. “It wasn`t nothing, was it?” 

“No.”

Cat folded her hands. “What have you found out? If you don`t mind me asking.”   
Kara shook her head, but still avoiding Cats eyes.   
“I-I am trans.” The blonde swallowed. 

“I am proud of you!”, the CEO said.   
Kara looked up.   
“What?”   
“You heard me. It takes a lot of bravery to say that. I am proud of you for that.”   
The reporter was looking at her with her blue eyes wide open.   
“So, what pronouns do I use for you?” 

Kara smiled brightly. “He/him.”   
Cat nodded. “Do you have a new name I could use for you?”   
Kara shook his head. “No, but Nia knows and at the moment she just calls me Danvers. She is also making a list with possible names for me.”   
Cat laughed. “sounds just like her. If I have an idea, could I add it to the list?” 

Danvers nodded. “Of course, the more help I get, the better!” 

The CEO looked at the blond. Cat really was proud of him. It couldn`t have been easy.   
“Does anyone except Miss Nal and me know?”   
Danvers shook his head. “Not yet. I am not sure how they would react.”   
The older woman raised an eyebrow. “Isn`t everyone you`re friends with queer in some way? Seriously, it`s like a gay club!”   
“That`s…. actually kinda true.”, Danvers giggled. “But it`s still scary. I know that all of them will support me eventually, but…”   
“-It´s not about if they are ready to hear it, but if you are ready to say it.”, Cat finished his sentence. 

“Yes. This world is a cruel place and I know that there are already a lot of people that hate me for who I am. But this is a little like I´m putting a target sign on my forhead and say `just shoot me already`.”   
Cat looked at her padawan with affection. And yes, padawan. Her son had made her watch the movies so many times, she was aware that Danvers was basecelly just that to her. 

“Take all the time you need. When you`re ready, no matter how the others react, I`ll be in your corner!”  
Danvers stood up.   
He smiled at her one last time, before he left her office.   
Cat rubbed her hands together.   
She had to put a name on the list.


	11. Superhero duties

Danvers was thrown into a wall.  
He gritted his teeth.  
Around him the dust slowly settled on the ground. 

"Argh" The blond stood up.  
His muscles were sore and there was a deep cut on his right calf.  
The mask that Lena had made for him after he had cut his hair was covering his face from the one cracy reporter that was still taking pictures while he was fighting this cracy strong alien.  
He stood up, his leg was demanding him to sit down but when did a superhero ever listen to their bodys needs? The blond stepped forward again. 

The blue giant looked at him, its yellow eyes glimming through the foggy air.  
Danvers took a deep breath, then lunged into the fight again.  
The kryptonians bodys had already taken a lot of the monsters punches and hits. 

And still the other alien didn`t seem to get tired. 

It was still as strong as it had been at the beginning of the fight.  
But the superhero was getting tired. His muscles were screaming at him to just let it be.  
To let the other alien take over, just so that the sore limbs could finally rest.  
Danvers stomach took another hit and he could feel his ribs breaking. 

The blond tautened his shoulders.  
He had to keep going. He flew at the giant again.  
With his right fist he punched the other alien in the gut. It screamed in pain. Danvers landed on the ground. His heart beating fast and sweat covering his whole body. 

"You aren`t an easy one, are ya?"  
Danvers reached up and lifted the suffocating mask of his face.

For a moment the blond closed his eyes.  
He could hear the heart of the alien in front of him beating.  
It`s breathing, the blood pumping through its vaines. 

Danvers had closed his eyes just for a bit to long. 

He was still trying to recover just a fractien of his pover, when a sharp pain went through his body.  
He felt the heat in his stomach and that something was extremely wrong.  
The kryptonian opened his eyes.  
As he looked down, he noticed that he was kneeling. 

The heros sight was starting to blur.  
A claw was digging into his stomach.  
Just a moment later it was gone. Danvers tried to stand up. He wanted to help, he couldn`t let this take him down. 

When the blond tried to stand up, it did the exact oposit.  
His body completely crashed on the ground. Danvers had lost the control over his limbs. 

No bone was listening to the superhero. 

Danvers could feel blood sickering out of his wound. Hot and steamy it was building a puddle around him.  
Danvers knew, if help wouldn`t arrive within two minutes he wouldn`t make it.  
That was the risk of the job. 

The DEO wouldn`t arrive on time. The monster was to dangerouse to just walk through the city and they would need every hand to help them catch it.  
His heart was stilling beating.  
Danvers could hear the fast sound.  
He could still feel that he was alive. 

But the live was sickering out of the man. And there was nothing that the blond could do about it.  
He couldn`t even hear the heartbeats of his friends.  
That would have made it easier, to know that they were save.  
He hadn`t even told them who he really was.  
If the superhero was lucky Cat and Nia would tell them. 

On his grave maybe wouldn`t be written Kara. 

He started to cough. Blood was filling up his lungs.  
Wouldn`t it be easier to just close his eyes?  
The pull towards just going to sleep was getting stronger.  
There was nothing he could do about this anyway.  
And the kryptonian was getting tired.

Danvers closed his eyes. 

The world went dark. The noise became quite.  
He would just sleep for a bit. Dream of a better life. Dream of Krypton.  
And with the last few beats of his heart, he fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> .............I like chocolate


	12. A fallen god

Lena was staring blamkly into the space.   
Her mind was completely empty and so overwhelmed at the same time. 

To be honest, she didn`t know what to think. To much was going on and she had no time to understand what really was happening.   
The brunettes heart was aching. The feling of a hand clenching around it, had become frequent. And she didn`t knew when and if it would ever end.   
All in all, it was to much.   
To much for her to fully understand. 

The beeping of the monitor that was placed in the corner was disturbing her peace.   
She hated that thing, wanted to throw it into the wall. Punch it untill it would never work again, untill not even the best mechanic could repair it.   
But at the same time the beeping meant that it wasn`t to late, that there still was a chance of happyness. 

The hand that her fingers had been stroking for the past two hours weren`t cold, but not warm eather, not as warm as they used to be.   
And Lena wondered how she had gotten here. Some hours she hat been sitting in her office, trying to get a grumpy bussiness man to invest into a project L-Corp had started.   
And tha Jess had come in and told her that Alex had called.   
And than Lena was driven to the DEO and than she waited. 

She waited for hours, and those hours had felt like an entire eternity.   
Nobody had known what to say, all of them, Maggie, James, Nia and Lena were waiting in silence.   
When Eliza arrived, she hugged everybody, told them that surely everything would be alright. Ten minutes after that Alex had come out of the operation room, her shirt full of blood and her hands shaking.   
"They... they told me to wait out here..."   
The voice of the redhead had been full of fear.

Lena had trouble recognizing the director of the DEO in that moment.   
Eliza had hugged her daughter. "It will be okay sweetie.", she had whispered.  
And Alex had started sobbing.   
For the first time Lena didn`t see Alex as the badass that she always presented as. For the first ume, she saw Alex Danvers fall apart.   
The strong body of the woman was crashing onto the older woman, holding her as if her life depended on it. 

"And what if it won`t be? What if they can`t save her?" Eliza didn`t answer. She just held her daughter.   
Hugging not only for the redhead to feel save, but for herself to feel like not everything was lost. 

Nia was standing at the side. 

The reporter was staring at the szene with mixed feelings.   
She didn`t what to do.   
Danvers had been her mentor, her friend. Surely the blond had some problems but Nia knew that she could always rely on him.   
This was... strange.   
And she was ringing with herself.   
What if Danvers wouldn`t make it? Should she tell his family? Would that be fair to them? Would they even believe her?   
They probably wold if she would ask cat to reassure the story. 

Nia sighed, th blond hadn`t even chosen a name. Just yesterday she haad given him the list.   
He hadn`t picked yet, so he couldn`t leave, right? He wasn`t done yet, he hadn`t truly fpund out who he was yet.   
The story couldn`t end now.   
Not when the happy ending was way to close. 

Lena let the tears roll down her cheeks, not caring of they would look puffy.   
She wanted her girlfriend back. She wanted the blonde to wake up, to smile.   
She wanted to be able to yell at her for doing this reckless shit. 

She wanted her back. 

Their story wasn´t finished.   
They wanted to get married one day. She just waited for Kara to propose. Lena would have done it herself, but after a talk with Alex, she realized that since the blonde had arrived on earth, she had always had the dream to be the one who would propose.   
And who was Lena to take this away?   
She just wanted to hug the blonde. 

But Kara was lieng in this bed, liveless and bound to mashines. 

Her usually lightely browned skin, was pale. Her hair was in messy stubbles.   
Her whole body was covered in bandages, The blue alien had not just broken her rips and almost destroyed alost every inner organ that Kara posessed, bur also had cut and bruised her skin. Lena never had seen the usually so strong hero this weak.   
And it was breaking her to know that the girl in front of her even could be like this.   
She was basecelly a good, and gods shouldn`t bleed. She should be flying above the city right. Should be making jokes with her sister, work at Catco, cuddle Lena....  
"Please, please just come back.", Lena whispered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed this chapter.  
> I know it took a bit of a surprising turn in the last chapter but I had to change something in the story.  
> Maybe it`s just mood changes. I haven`t been feeling well for the last few d´weks, months even. To be quite honest, pretty depressed and this is pretty much therapy for me. So I´m sorry if this is to dramatic for some people. I can be a bit dramatic...  
> Well, nedless to say, I hope all of you have a great day:)


	13. Cat Grant knows everything

"Miss Nal, why is Mister Danvers not here?"  
Cat sat in her office and held the phone to her ear while she was waiting for the younger woman to explain.   
The blonde had waited for the kryptonian to come into work all morning, mostly to ask him if he had already decided on a name.   
"He won`t be coming to work anytime soon, Miss Grant." 

Cat held in a breath. 

"Why? What happened?"   
Nia sighed. "He was being a stupid heroic hero. And the alien he was fighting was to strong..."   
The CEO schook her head. That couldn`t be!   
The blond was stronger than anyone else! He couldn`t be defeated by some random alien.

"Is he...?" Cat felt no need the last words, she knew that it was as clear as day what she had meant.   
"No... at least not yet. The DEO was able to save him. But he is unstable and in a coma."   
"Can I come by and see him?" Cat had to see him herself. Otherwise she would have trouble believing anything of the just said words.   
"I don`t know if Director Danvers would be okay with that. And you don`t know where the DEO is!" 

Cat grinned. 

"Oh dear, I`m Cat Grant, of course I know where the DEO is!"   
"Really?", Nia sounded surprised.   
"Yes! And I will be there! I don`t care if `director Danvers`likes it or not!" Nia gave up. "Okay. I´ll see you here."   
Cat got up from her desk. She looked through all the offices. James was sitting at his desk.   
Why wasn`t he with Danvers?   
They were such good friends. But that didn`t matter. She went up to him.   
" Mister Olsen? Could I talk to you for a minute?"   
He nodded, it was not like she had really given him a choise. She was his bosss, and he would do as she said. "Where is the DEO?"

It didn`t take Cat longer than ten minutes to get James to confess.   
The tall man tried to refuse but if your boss threatening you to eather be fired and burned alive or to keep working AND living, does that really give you a chance to say no?   
So now Cat was driving to the secret agency.   
When she was trying to get in, the body guards that were placed on the front doors also tried to keep her out.   
But nobody could keep Cat Grant from doing something. 

Five minutes later she was walking in the corridors of the building. She got into a room with computerboars, so that couldn`t be it. But in front of the screens, was standing a man. His hair was dark and was long enough to brush his shoulders.   
She had seen him before.   
But with whom? (note from author: Whom... I am so god damn fancy) 

Cat tried to think of where she had seen him.   
At the bank? No, that had been this punker girl.   
At the airport? Also no, that had been the police officer.   
Catco? 

Yes, that could be it. Had she seen him with Nia? Could that be? If she remembered correctly, he had tried to horribly flirt with her while Cat was burrying her face in her hands.   
That man had no clue how to woo someone.   
But that didn`t matter right now! He knew Nia, probably Danvers and he was here! So he probably knew where Danvers was!   
"Hello.", she greeted him.   
He turned around. His eyes wide with surprise.   
"Miss Grant?", he asked.   
" Yes Mister....", what was his name? It had been something unusual.   
"Brainy."   
"Mister Brownie! Could you tell me where Miss Danvers is?" 

Cat bit her toung, calling Danvers that felt incredibly wrong. 

"I am affraid that I can`t tell you that!"   
Cat raised an eyebrow. "Are you sure about that?" "Yes."   
Cat smiled. "You know that I am the owner of Catco? I have the ability to fire three of your friends from work. So, Mister Brownie, just tell me where the Danvers is!"   
Brainy seemed to think about it.   
"You know that this is basecelly black mailing?"   
Cat laughed. "Of course I do. So now, tell me where I can find the hero or I´ll also show you what a bullying is like!"   
Brainy nodded. "You do not seem to be a real danger. Nia and Kara trust you."   
He closed his eyes for a second. "Okay, follow me!"

When Cat entered the Infirmary, she caught the eyes of multiple people.   
Alex Danvers, who looked at her with a surprised face.   
The womans eyes were rendered red and Cat knew that she had been crying.   
Eliza Danvers, who was sitting right next to Alex. The older woman looked at her, but at first didn`t seem to be able to fit her into the story.   
And there was Nia.   
The brunette didn`t look surprised, she actually smiled. 

"You really did know where the DEO is!" Cat nodded, thinking about the threatened James. "Like said, I`m Cat Grant of course I know!"   
Eliza looked at her. "You are Cat Grant?"   
The CEO nodded. "Pleasure to meet you."   
Eliza shook her head. "What are you doing here?" "I am here to see Kara!"   
Alex didn`t even look up when she said: "Kara isn`t here!" 

Cat smiled. "Try that with other people! But do you really think I don`t know that Kara is supergirl?"   
The redhead now did look up.   
"Oh common, a pair of glasses? Whoever gave her the mask is smarter than any of you! Because no one with an IQ over 70 gets themself be fooled by the god damn glasses!" 

"I`ve been saying that for years!"  
A woman that Cat had never seen before walked into the room.   
In both of her hands she held a coffee and one of them she now gave to Alex.   
"It really is a horrible disguise!"   
"And who are you?", Cat asked the brunette.  
"Maggie Sawyer."   
Cat raised an eyebrow. She knew that Danvers maybe had once mentioned a Maggie, but that had been a long time ago. 

"I`m a detective and Alex is my wife."   
"You are Maggie? Kara told me about the wedding! Didn`t you end up singing karaoke while the cake was burning?"   
Maggie laughed. "Yepp, the one and only!"   
"So, why exactly do you want to see my sister?", Alex asked.   
Cat sighed. "Kara is one of the best employees I have. Over the years we kind of became friends. If something happened to the little Danvers, I would want t see her before something bad happens." Alex nodded, okay with the answer.   
"Lena is with her right now, but I don`t think she`ll mind."


	14. Keeping a secret

"Alex?", Lena asked, looking up from her girlfriends face. "Yes.", the redhead answered.  
"What`s up?", the brunette asked. Cat noticed that the young woman seemed tired. Her skin, that was always pale, now almost completely white. She noticed the dark bags under her eyes.   
"Miss Grant?", Lena said, noticing Cat now for the first time.   
"Miss Luthor.", the blonde greeted the younger CEO.   
"What are you doing here?" 

Cat nodded over to Danvers. "The superhero over there."   
Lena smiled. "Of course. And of course you know that Kara is supergirl, she told me that you are one to figure out secrets."   
Cat laughed. "Glad to know that the Danvers is talking about me in a positiv way."  
"She really does. You sound a bit surprised about it though."   
"Let`s say, I can be a bit... harsh. Especially with her. I didn`t make it easy for her." 

Lena raised an eyebrow. "Why not?"   
"Because Kara has a lot of talent. She cares about people so deeply and tries to fight for everyone that she sometimes forgets to fight for herself." 

Alex had watched the two talk, but she felt like she was intruding. The redhead left the other two woman alone. 

The brunette brought a hand up to Danvers face. Slowly she brushed the aliens cheekbone.   
"That`s sadly very true. Tell me Miss Grant, since when have you been back in National City?"   
Cat tilted her head. "Not for to long. Two weeks maybe..."   
Lena nodded. The brunette looked back at Danvers. 

Cat noticed that Lena seemed sad.   
Not just for the reason that her lover was laying in a hospital bed, but for something else.   
Like something was resting on the young SEO`s shoulders.   
Cat sat down on the other side of the bed. With steady fingers she let one of her hands grab Karas right hand. "Lena?"   
The brunette looked up. 

"How do you feel about this?" 

Lena bit her lip. "I`m not sure. Sad, of course. I love her so much."   
Cat nodded. "Yeah, but are you sure that there isn`t something else?"   
Lena looked into the blue eyes of Karas chef.   
"I am scared. I am scared that she won`t make it. Affraid of what will happen if that..." She stayed silent for a minute.   
She had to breath.   
She concentrated on the beeping of the mashine, the subtle raising of Karas chest. 

"Kara changed over the last few months."   
Cat looked at the CEO. "How?"   
"She stopped being confident. She changed her style completely and I don`t know what to make of that."   
Cat now was the one to bite her lip. "Do you like the way Kara changed her style?"   
"Yes! of course. She`s beautyful. And I also love her short hair. It suits her so well. But I don`t know why she did it. And that`s what is making this situation even harder. I just want her to be happy. She should be able to tell me f something isn`t alright." 

Cat smiled sadly. "Do you think that she was hiding something?"   
Lena nodded. "Yeah. But again, I don`t know what. And it feels like I failed her because whatever it is, she didn`t think that she could tell me." 

Cats heart ached for the girl in front of her.   
Because she knew what the secret was.   
She knew what Danvers wanted to tell.   
But she didn`t feel like it was her place to tell Lena. Danvers had to do that. 

"Maybe Kara just wasn`t ready to tell the world. Whatever it was. Sometimes it`s not about the people around us. It`s about us being ready to tell the world, being prepared for all possible concequences."   
Lena looked at Kara with tears in her eyes.   
"I just want her to wake up! I just want to be able to tell her that it`s okay, whatever it is. That I will support her. That we will take on the world together." 

The older woman stood up.   
She walked over to Lena and put a hand on her shoulder.   
"It will be okay! You will be okay! Kara won`t die! She will tell you and than you two can go on and have a big wedding and have ten children!"   
"Ten is a bit much."   
"No it`s not. No if you`re paying for it!"   
Lena laughed. "I just really want a future with her."   
Cat smiled.   
"You will. If not I will kill the idiot when I get up there."


	15. Drowning

Danvers felt like he was floating.  
Everything around him felt soft. Like he was lying on the most comfortable pile of pillows anyone had ever see. It felt good lieng there. He felt like there was no responseabilaty was pushing his shoulders down, almost crashing his back. But he didn`t know why he felt so relieved.

Hadn`t it always been this way?  
Just being light? There hadn`t been something before this. It had always just been him and the feeling of happiness.  
It was weird. 

Suddenly a memory started to itch in his brain, wanting to come out. Danvers felt like there was something he had forgotten.  
But what could it possibly be?  
There was nothing to worry about! So how could Danvers be able to forget something.  
In the blonds heart a sudden feeling of sadness exploded, shattered all of the feelings of happiness.  
All the feeling of being light. But where could it come from? Why did he suddenly feel so heavy?

Something was pushing him down, away from the pillows, dragging him through an ocean.  
His lungs were suddenly filled with water. Was it water? It tasted metallic. So how could it be water? He coughed, tried to get it out but his lungs kept on filling with it.  
His thoughts began to slow down. There was nothing Danvers could do to stop it. The blond would drown. And he would have to make peace with it.  
And honestly? He was okay with it.  
Or had been.  
But still there was something Danvers felt like he had forgotten. As if there had been something before. As if he had been someone.  
But that couldn`t be. And now he was drowning.  
The blond started seing swirls of color. Red, blue, green and yellow was fading and ever coming back in his sight.  
His head felt like it had been punched and dizzyness started to set in.  
Before Danvers could even begin to fully start to comprehend what happened, his world turned black.

Lena was sitting before Karas bed. The blonde was peacefull, still looking sore but the bruises on her collar bone started to fade.  
Her fingers had been tracing Karas jawline, following the contour of her cheekbones and stroking her hair back for the past hour.  
Cat had left some time ago and for around thirty minutes Eliza had kept her company.  
Karas mother was devestated. She worried for her daughter so much, Lena wanted to let Eliza give all of her sorrows to her. But that wasn`t possible. 

"God Kara, if you knew how much everyone misses you! Your mother worries so much about you and Alex tried to kill an agent ten minutes ago because he was looking to happy.  
The poor man still has no clue what he really has done wrong but now he`s standing around looking really depressed."  
Lena smiled. "Please just come back!"

Lena had just finished talking that something in the way Kara looked changed.  
Her face became pale, paler than before and her chest started to hecticly lift.  
Lena stared at her girlfriend. What was happening? Was that normal? Probably not.  
A cough started to shake Karas whole body. Blood coming out of her mouth. 

"Alex! ALEX!", she screamed. Within seconds the redhead had arrived, taking in her sisters figure.  
"Fuck", the agent cursed. "What is happening?", the brunette asked, her heart filled with fear.  
"An inner wound opened, it`s filling up her lungs!" Alex activated the intercom in her ear.  
"Get the operation table ready! A team of nurses has to be there in three minutes!"  
Lena stood back, watching Alex releasing the breaks on Karas hospital bed, and also cutting the cables of the mashines that were tracing back to Karas body, loose.  
"We`re gonna have to operate supergirl again. Yes, one of the wounds has opened. Get the room sterelized!"


	16. Ieiu?

ieiu

„She is okay.“, Alex said.  
Lena finally relaxed.  
Once again she had been scared for Karas life. “Is this going to happen again?”, the brunette asked.  
Alex didn`t look like she was sure. The redhead shrugged her shoulders. “Depends. It could happen but it also could be easy peacy from here on. It all depends on her.” 

Lena nodded. She really hoped that it would be the second option. For the second time within in ten hours she had to worry about her girlfriends live and that wasn`t something that was incredibly soothing.  
“Can I see her?”  
Alex bit her lip. “Lena, you haven`t been home the whole time you were here!”  
“You weren`t eather.”, Lena pointed out. “That`s not the same thing since this is my job!” Alex looked at the brunette. “I´m serious, go home! Sleep a bit. Kara is still in a coma and probably won`t wake up in quite some time. It doesn`t do anyone good if you sit here and are exhausted.”  
Lena looked at the floor. She wanted to see Kara. But at the same time Alex was right.  
“Okay, but you have to promise that you`ll go home soon too!”  
The agent nervously avoided Lenas gaze. “Promise me!” Alex sighed. “Okay, fine! I`ll go home soon too.”

It had been one week.  
One whole week since Kara had been awake.  
One week without seeing the goofy kryptonian smile. One week since Lena had last been able to kiss her. 

It was driving the Luthor crazy. Most of the time she was at the DEO. She had brought her laptop and worked from a chair next to Kara.  
She would tell Kara about her day, what she had for breakfast and how Alex once again managed to almost burn down her and Maggies kitchen.  
And every god damn day she expected Kara to answer. 

The CEO knew that it was silly and that it wouldn`t happen but if your girlfriend almost dies it kinda gives you the right to act irrational.  
Kara looked better than a week ago.  
She still was pale and the shadow of the bruises were still drawn onto her skin but she didn`t look like she was going to die anymore. Since there had been the second incident where Kara almost died, it had been quite.  
Nothing had really changed in the kryptonians condition. That wasn`t bad. It wasn`t great but at least it hadn`t gotten worse. 

Two days ago Clark had showed up in the DEO.  
For a moment Lena had considered hitting him.  
He had showed up way to late. Kara had been almost killed a week ago and Clark showed up four days later. 

Four fucking days. 

It could have been too late by then.  
And than he dared to show up after such a long time. All of Karas friends and family had worried night and day. But apparently Clark had no issues to sleep at night.  
None at all.  
He hadn`t showed because “She`s Supergirl. It isn`t that bad! I had worse.” 

After that comment Eliza had to hold both Alex and Lena back. Both woman wanted to break the older ones bones.  
How could he dare to talk like that? How could he have such little respect?  
Lena knew that Clark wasn`t the best cousin. When Kara arrived on earth when she was fourteen, Clark gave her to the Danvers family.  
Kara hadn`t known the language of the planet.  
She didn`t know anyone. She had to deal with powers she didn`t had before. 

Alex told Lena that Kara was terrified of touching people when she first came to earth. She would hide away and shy away from handshakes and hugs.  
She had trouble understanding the people around her. Not just because of the language barrier, that one had been solved pretty early. It was the fact that people on earth acted different than the people on krypton. It wasn`t very common on the other planet to show feelings.  
It wasn`t something that was endured. Hugging people wasn`t something that Kryptonians had done at all. Kara had to deal with a whole lot of new things.  
Alex had told Lena that other students would call Kara “autism girl”, thinking that she didn`t hear it. 

But Kara did. 

And she tried not to react but Kara had after that tried to seem more “normal”.  
When she would raise her hand during math or sience lessons before, she now would just sit there, take notes and almost not react. Kara got quite.  
In college it got better.  
Kara wore dresses and went out with boys. She started to fit in.  
And during all that, Clark had left her alone.  
Expected Kara to be just fine, to be okay just like him. 

He never understood that Kara didn`t grow up with powers like he did. That she didn`t grew up on earth.  
That she had ptsd, that she had claustrophobia, that she couldn`t just be fine.

He had never understood. 

But still he dared to say “I had worse”. His cousin almost died, was in a fucking coma and he barely reacted. 

Lenas hands formed fists. Her jaw was clenched. Once again she was mad at the super. He had no right to leave Kara alone.  
But he did. So why did Kara still call him family? Why was Kara so stubborn to call him every week? Why did she seek his approval so badly? Lena had never understood and she probably never would. And that was fine but once Kara would wake up she would talk to the other girl.  
She had to understand that Clark wasn`t worth it. She just hoped that the blonde would understand.

Lena sighed. It had gotten late. Outside of the DEO had started to lower on the sky and red tilted the day blue. The brunette smiled. On an evening like this Kara would ask Lena to jump into her arms and she would fly them somewhere they could watch the sun go down.  
Kara loved it. “It looks a bit like krypton.”, she had said. Lena always was happy to hear Kara talk about krypton. She wanted to know everything she could about the other planet. And the alien looked so happy when she talked about it. She looked like she was making peace with it.  
..................

Danvers was dreaming.  
The time where he had been lying on pillows was long gone. After the feeling of drowning had finally gone away, he had started dreaming about his live.  
About the live he had lived until this moment. The first time his father had taken him to his laboratory on krypton. Danvers had been so happy. He had showed him constellations of stars.  
He remembered when his mother would come from work and the family would eat in the evening together. 

When Clark was born, how happy he had been. Excited to see another kryptonian grow up. To maybe have someone to teach things, to have someone to play. Danvers was supposed to take over the sience guild. It was only one year until he would have been an official member of the guild. He had been excited and his parents had been so proud.  
His aunt Astra had smiled at him. 

But then everything went to shit. 

The centre of the planet started to disrupt.  
And Clark was send away and then his parents told Danvers that he would have to go to.  
That he would take care of Clark. They had seated Danvers in the pot. The blond was scared. But wanted to make his parents proud. And then there was the phantom zone. He had been in there for so long.  
A thousand hours of darkness.  
A thousand hours of dark dreams, the picture of krypons explotion burned into his mind. 

And then arriving on earth. Seeing the black haired man, with the symbol of the El family on his chest.  
And Danvers had started to hope. But the man couldn`t speak kryptonian. He could speak a few words but it sounded broken. He met Jeremiah, Eliza and Alex. And suddenly they were his new family. But Alex didn`t like Danvers.  
He was to weird, to alien. The kids at school that called him autism girl, the sister that wanted him to go and the dreams that came at night. The restlessness. He felt so scared.  
And years went by. Eventually Alex became his sister.  
Eventually people stopped saying things behind his back.  
But eventually he started to see who he was and who he didn`t want to be.  
And wouldn`t it be easier to just vanish? To just leave this earth?  
In Danvers dreams there was a light at the end. It was drawing him to it.  
And with every bad memory that appeared, he got closer to it. It was an valid option. He had lived a lot. Had seen things that nobody else did. Survived so much that he started to wonder why? Why was it always him that survived.

“Hey boy.”, a voice called for him.  
Danvers looked up from the memory of him lying dead in the grass while Alex had just remembered who he was.  
The blond looked up and he saw…. the face of his mother.  
Alura.  
After so many years her hair was still brown and her eyes still full of warmth and love.  
“ieiu?”  
“Yes boy.” Tears started to fill his eyes.  
“What are you doing here?” Alura watched him with a sad smile. “I`m here to tell you that it`s to early for you.”  
The blond shook his head. “No, it`s not.”  
“Yes it is.”  
“You don`t understand. I tried! I tried so hard! But I can`t. And I`m just so tired.” 

Alura stepped closer to him, holding out her arms for the younger kryptonian.  
Danvers sobbed into her arms. The brown haired woman let him.  
“You are needed! You have to go back!” “I can`t. I can`t be a superhero anymore. I can`t be Kara anymore.”  
Alura stroked gently through his short hair. “They don`t need you as a hero. They just need you! Alex needs you. Eliza needs you. Nia needs her mentor and Lena? Lena needs her soulmate!” 

Danvers shook his head. “Then they need Kara. And I can`t be her.” Alura took his face into her hands.  
Driving her finger along his jaw, taking in the blue eyes. “You don`t have to be Kara! I know how you feel. I watched you for years. You are my son! And they will be fine with that. Cat Grant was. So was Nia. The girl reminds me so much of you.”  
“But I don`t even know who I want to be!”  
“You are my son. You are Elizas son! You are Nias mentor, James friend, Alex`s brother, Lenas husband…”  
“Lena and I aren`t married.”, Danvers interrupted his mother.  
“I know. Get your head out of your ass on that one. You won`t find someone like her again! Just ask her and finally have children and get a dog.” 

“You sound just like Eliza and Cat.”  
Alura laughed. “Smart woman think alike.”  
Danvers nodded. He hugged his mother once more, buried his face in her neck, not wanting to let his mother go.  
“You will be alright, Son!”  
The blond smiled, tears in his eyes. “Thank you mom.” He leaned forward and kissed her cheek.  
“When you`re back, look out for the color purple!”  
“But why?”  
“Just do it. Trust me, I am smarter then you may think.”  
Danvers laughed and Alura stepped aside. “Now get out of here! Your friends are waiting for you.” Danvers nodded and he had already done a few steps when he turned around once more. 

“What do you think my name should be?”  
The brown haired woman smiled. “Aidan. “Ain-El, like your grandfather.”  
He smiled. His grandfather had been a wise man.  
And he had told him storys. He had always wanted to be like him when he was younger.  
Smilingly he nodded.  
“Thank you, ieiu.”  
“No problem, no go on! And don`t forget that I love you”  
He nodded once again and with a smile on his face, Aidan started to escape this world of dreams.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...So.... I chose the name Aidan for him like someone suggested. A big thank you to everyone else who also gave me suggestions. But Aidam somehow really spoke to me on that one.  
> It`s a name for someone confident, that he hopefully will be.  
> Also,it means the bringer of fire and that`s also awesome.  
> Anyway, have a great day!


	17. Waking up

He heard silent breathing. The beeping of a machine. He could smell the sterile air that only hospitals had.   
Aidan scrunched his nose. Hospital. Great. Exactly where he wanted to be. The blond opened his eyes. A moment later the kryptonian had to shut them again, it was too bright here! Way to bright. It took another two minutes for Aidan to be able to keep his eyes open.   
He had been right, it was the hospital. Or more correctly, it was the hospital tract of the DEO. In the left corner there were multiple machines.   
A see through tube was lined up from a drip with a needle reaching right into Aidans arm. Next to the drip was a monitor.   
It showed someones heartbeat- his as he realized. 

Right, he had almost died.  
The kryptonian should remember that. On his left side, weight was pushing down the mattress. And lying there, hair in a bun, wearing an oversized shirt and her eyes shut close, was Lena.   
Aidan smiled. He worried a little bit that the woman hadn`t taken care of herself while he had been gone. Lena tended to show self-destructive behavior when she was on her own.   
And according to the cark bags that circled under Lenas eyes, that had been the case. 

Lena also looked like she had lost weight. Her cheeks seemed a little hollow, but that wasn`t anything that a few extended brunches couldn`t make right. Aidan sighed. The blond didn`t want to wake his girlfriend. But he probably had to at some point. But not just yet. Aidan noticed that his superpowers hadn`t recharged. He was still human and he could feel that his body was sore. His stomach felt weird. Like there was pressure on it but at the same time he couldn`t really feel it.   
Probably due to the pain medication he had probably been given. 

The blond sighed and softly he ran his fingers through Lenas hair. The woman relaxed under his touch, her shoulders sacking down and her face loosing tension. "My love", Aidan whispered. The brunette didn`t react.   
The blond smiled sadly. "Wake up my love.", he whispered again.   
Lenas head jerked up. Tired and disoriented she looked around.   
She looked at him but her brain seemed to be rebooting itself. Aidan took the time to draw his fingers along her jawline, to take in every feature of her face.   
Gosh she was beautiful. "Kara!"

Aidan tensed up. Right. He smiled at her. "Hey Lee."  
The brunette looked at him like she was worried that he could vanish in a second. "Please tell me that you`re really here and that I`m not going completely "   
The kryptonian giggled. "You are always a little crazy." Out of reflex Lena longed forward and punshed his shoulder.   
"Ouch. Really? was that necessary?" Lena laughed. "You are real! Thank god." Lena longed forward again but this time to throw her arms around him, squeezing him tightly.   
Lena buried her face on the aliens chest, breathing in his scent. 

Apple and cotton candy. 

It was still there. Mixed with a bit of the hospital stench. But it was still there, and that was enough.   
Aidan held her close, giving his girlfriend a sense of security. Before he let her go, he pressed a kiss on her temple. Lena looked at him, tears in her eyes. "We have to get Alex.", Lena realized.   
"Can`t we just cuddle and wait till some doctor checks up on us?"   
The brunette shook her head. "You know that we gotta tell her." Aidan had observed that already but he wanted to stay alone with Lena for just a little bit longer.   
Just a bit longer that he didn`t have to take on responsibility.   
He would miss that. "Okay, go get her." 

Two minutes Lena had been gone. Aidan mentally prepared himself to hear a speech. something about being more responsible.   
Because Alex would probably be happy that the kryptonian woke up but she would be furious on why Aidan had gone on the mission alone. Why he hadn`t waited.   
And to be honest he didn`t have an answer for that. Which sucked because Alex would expect some kind of explanation.   
The door to the room was pushed open and a flair of red rushed to the bed. And suddenly Aidan was being hugged again.   
Alex clinged onto him. When he finally let the younger one go she bumped him on the shoulder. "OUCH!", he cried out. Why did he get hit AGAIN? 

"Kara Danvers, you irresponsible asshole! Do you know how much we worried? Any fucking idea?"   
Aidan blushed. He avoided her gaze.   
"Why, for the love god did you think that it was a good idea to fight that alien alone? What were you thinking? Were you thinking anything at all? Why didn`t you fucking wait? But now! You had to go and play the hero and fight the god dam alien alone! Use your brain! You almost died multiple times and I won`t let you act this reckless again!"   
She paused.   
Aidan was staring at a point above her shoulder.   
She looked at him.   
"Do you understand that?" He didn`t answer. Alex pushed up his chin, making him look at her.   
"Do you understand that?" Aidan nodded. His jaw clenched. "Now common, we have to check your wounds." 

Aidan waited for Alex to let him stand up. The redhead helped him lift the hospital robe above his head. He was completely naked under. Aidan didn`t want to look down. Not because of the wound.   
That wasn`t the think he cared for.   
The hero already had scars and he been hurt more than once but because of how his body looked. That wasn`t something that the kryptonian wanted to see. 

Alex cleaned his wound, made sure that all the blood that had sickered through the stitches was an normal amount and that they didn`t had anything to worry about. When they were finished, Aidan still didn`t look at the redhead. Alex renewed the bandages across his stomach. "Does anything else hurt?" "No. Feels numb. How much pain medication exactly did you give me?"   
Alex shook her head. "Well, you had to get more that the Average. You have multiple broken ribs plus some of your organs were damaged."

He nodded. That made sense. Alex took a step back. "I`ll let you alone for a second and call mom."   
"She`s here?"  
"Yeah, she arrived after you got injured."  
The blond felt guilty. Eliza was a busy woman. And he had probably had stolen her quiet some time that she could have spent in the lab.   
Alex left and Aidan was alone with his thoughts. 

Alura had said that he shouldn`t worry about coming out and just do it. But this didn`t seem like the right time.   
Everyone had been worried about him. He should at least wait till everyone had calmed down and knowning Alex that would take a while.   
The redhead was really angry. And Aidan felt bad for disappointing her once again. He sighed.   
He would have to get ready for pleading looks. Fuck.


	18. The list

Being watched the entire day sucks.   
Having the eyes of a secret service on you can ruin your mood a bit. And if that combines with a steady pain and not being able to move like you want too, it really destroys any type of good feelings. 

Aidan was mostly lying in bed. His muscles were still sore, the cut on his stomach seemed to be healing good though.   
A problem that he had to face was the fact that he couldn`t walk. With help the blond was able to stand but walking wasn`t possible.   
His muscles would start to shake and after thirty seconds he would lose all feelings from his feet up to his hips. 

“Your spine wasn`t directly damaged but multiple nerves are pressing on it that shifted due to your other injuries.” Alex was looking him sad in the eyes.   
“But it`ll be okay, right?”   
The redhead bit her lips. “If you had your superpowers back by now, I would be able to tell you that it`s gonna be fine within some hours but since you don`t have your superhealing…”   
Aidan couldn`t help but feel the disappointment.   
And yeah, he had made a mistake by trying to fulfill the mission alone but at a certain point Alex would have to let that go. Aidan already felt bad for having made that mistake, Alex didn`t have to rub it in.   
“You will have to do a lot of physical therapy once we remove your stitches.”   
Aidan nodded. “Do you think that my powers will come back?”   
Alex closed her eyes, she seemed to brace herself for answering the question. 

That honestly was answer enough. 

“We can`t say for sure. You didn`t just use all of your strength, that isn`t a normal solar flare.   
Your body completely exhausted itself. We are trying to find a solution! Lena has been working on something but we can`t be sure that`ll work. I`m sorry.”  
The blond had expected something like that. Aidan had been powerless before and it had never ended good. He had broken his arms and had run right into a robbery. If he now would be powerless, for an indefinite time, he would have to learn how to be human or would get himself killed within a month. 

“Hey Danvers!”, Nia greeted him with a wide smile. “Hi” Right behind her a frowning Cat Grant was looking him over.   
“Well hello Miss Grant.” The blonde woman nodded but was still taking in his figure. “You know, you can only let me burn off in flames if you have heatvision and except you didn`t tell us something your stare won`t do anything.”   
“Don`t get sassy with me! You almost got yourself killed! If I was your sister I would tie you to that bed so you can`t do shit like that again.”   
Aidan smiled. “Nah, not necessaire. It`s not like I can run away."   
Nia hit him on the shoulder. “Ouch! Why does everybody hit me! I`m ALREADY injured!”   
The brunette scoffed. “Not funny and you just are very punchable. And it`s not like you can `run away`” 

Aidan raised an eyebrow. “Miss Grant! Nia is mocking me!”   
Cat grinned. “I gathered as much.” “Make her stop! I`m injured and can`t defend myself.” Cat gave Nia a head-nod.   
A second later Aidan felt a second punch.   
“Why? What did I do?” “Stop whining. If you don`t want to get hit, don`t get yourself into situations like this. It`s that simple.” Nia agreed with Cat and as to confirm the words that were just spoken she punched Aidan again.   
“I didn`t even say anything!”, Aidan said, looking at Nia in disbelieve.   
The younger woman shrugged and grinned. Cat stepped forward and dropped a piece of paper on the hospital blanket.   
“Anyway, you have a lot of time now so you can take a look at the list of names Nia and I made for you.”   
Nia laughed. “We made? I put almost every single name on there!”, she said, pointing at the list.   
“You only had one name!” Cat seemed to be confident in her abilities. “And it`s a great name and I`m sure he`ll like it.” Nia rolled her eyes. 

Despite having already found a name, Aidan wanted to take a look at the list.   
He unfolded the piece of paper and read over the names. Nia had written down the names on the left side, on the right their meaning was noted. 

Kyle: Narrow Strait, Channel; Scottish origin  
Andrew: manly, consequence, brave, strong, courageous, warrior; greek origin  
Chris: to bear, to carry; greek origin  
Dean: monk or dignitary in charge of ten others; greek origin  
Ethan: firm, enduring, strong and long-lived; Hebrew origin  
Xander: Defender Of The People; greek origin  
Nico: people of victory; greek origin

Aidan looked up.   
He had no clue how many names were of greek origin. Nia surely had done her research.   
The list went on for another thirty names. It was impressive. Nia had written down a lot. “And?” Nia asked with anticipation in her voice. Aidan chuckled. “You surely put thought into this.”   
Cat raised an eyebrow. “You already chose, didn`t you?”   
The brunette looked at him in disbelieve.   
“Tell me she is wrong and I didn`t put this list together to be completely useless in the end.”   
Aidan avoided her gaze. “It`s a great list!” “Are you kidding me? Do you know how long this took me? And the one over there only put one name!” The hero tried to smiled apologetic.   
Nia sighed. “What name did you chose?”   
Cat looked at him interested. “Aidan, after my grandfather.” 

Nia sacked back and buried her face in her hands. Aidan looked over to Cat, wanting to ask why the brunette looked so disappointed.   
But Cat was laughing.   
She was bent over and holding her stomach.   
“You`ve got to be kidding me.”, Nia whispered.   
Aidan was confused. “What`s so funny?”   
“Just look at the bottom of the list!”, Cat said, still laughing.   
Aidans eyes went down the list and stopped at a name that was written in intricate writing.   
It was different than the small but neat writing that was written across the rest of the page.

Aidan: little flame, fire bringer; irish origin

“How?” Aidan asked, looking up to see Nia giving Cat an annoyed look.   
“I`m Cat Grant, I know everything!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will use this explanation for everything that Cat does! She just does know everything. That`s how it is. How does she know? I`ve got no clue eather. It`s like Maggie. She knows everything too. How? She`s a detective.
> 
> Also, I tried to come out to friend of mine over a message. I send her my instagram after she asked and since she talk a lot with my parents I asked her to not say anything. My instagram has "Connor, he/him", written on it. I thought that would be enough. I was naiv. She didn`t understand and I`m to tried to explain it. So yeah, that coming out failed.  
> Anyway, have a great day:)


	19. Little Danvers

Lena was staring at the screen in front of her. Her eyes were drawn to the little symbols that were rolling upon the display.   
She was working with kryptonite. There had to be something within the procurement of the substance that would help Kara. But until now she hadn`t found anything and she was getting frustrated. “Just something else I can cross off the list…”, she whispered as the pen in her left hand crossed out Cell components on a sheet of paper. 

What could she have missed? 

Was there even anything left to be missed? She had the tip of the pencil drawn across the paper to many times as to still be able to say that there was anything that she hadn`t noticed.   
But she had to find something. There had to be something that would help. Just a few hours ago they had tested Kara to her reaction to kryptonite and to her surprise, she still got weaker when she was exposed to the stone. Something that shouldn`t be happening, hence, she had no powers. But still the vaines under her skin had started to glow with a green light and the blonde had started to grit her teeth while trying not to break down. 

According to Alex, Karas reaction to kryptonite had if anything, gotten stronger.   
That was the part that made a bit sense. She had no powers, hence no Defense Mechanism. Even if Kara would get better in the next few weeks, that she would be able to walk again, the DEO would still not be able to let her go. Her immune system was almost non-existent, which made her incredibly susceptible to diseases.   
They would first have to help her build an immune system, which would take a while. And Lena noticed that Kara was getting frustrated. The alien tried to pretend that everything was fine but it was obvious that it wasn`t. 

But when Lena tried to talk about it, Kara shut down and said things like “Everything is going to be fine! It`s gonna be okay!” And Lena knew that Kara said that because she trusted in Lena and her abilities but Lena didn`t really believe that she would find anything.   
She had searched for a cure, had tried to do something that could help but there wasn`t anything. Lena sighed. Kara would have to come to terms with being human.   
She had reached the end of her knowledge and there just wasn`t anything to be done. It was difficult to accept but the sooner the better. 

Aidan was lying in bed (where else could he be?) and scribbled something in his notebook.   
Nothing interesting had happened that day. He had woken up, ate breakfast, got his stitches cleaned, read a bit, had lunch, Lena had visited, than he had read a bit. Alex hadn`t showed up yet. But just when Aidan was putting his notebook aside, a known brunette stuck her head into the room. 

“Is Alex here?” “No Maggie, you can come in.” Aidan had noticed that Maggie and Alex had been more distant.   
Since he had gotten injured, Alex had constantly been on edge, had worked long hours and tried on keep the city save while also trying to help him. Aidan felt guilty for putting this much pressure on his older sister. The redhead deserved to go home and to relax with her girlfriend. 

“Thank god.”, Maggie said while rushing into the room and shutting the door behind her.   
“I love her a lot but she`s been exhausting to be around. She`s so stressed and it`s just hard to just breath in the same atmosphere as her without making her angry somehow.”   
Aidan stared at the wall, avoiding the cops eyes. That had been something he had been doing a lot for the past few weeks. Avoiding to look at people, trying not to be more of a burden and just letting them go on with their live. 

“You know that that`s not your fault?”, Maggie asked. Aidans head spun around. “You know very well that it is. If I wasn`t here, Alex wouldn`t be so stressed and you two would have a good time.” Maggie now was the one to avoid the other ones gaze.   
His shoulders sagged down. She agreed with him. Not a great feeling but also not something he hadn`t already been aware of. “Don`t make yourself feel bad. Please.” Maggie said.   
Aidan snorted. Easy for her to say. “I know it`s difficult but you have to stay strong!”   
The blond shook his head. 

He had tried for so long to stay strong. 

“You will be okay! Even if you don`t get your powers back. You will still be a part of this weird family. Nothing is going to change that.”   
He would like to believe her. He would like to believe her so bad but it just wasn`t that easy. Aidan had fought with his powers for a long time.   
Tried to come to terms with the fact that he had the responsibility to help.   
Eliza had told him that it wasn`t his purpose to be a hero but he still became one. It still became a big part of his being. Aidan always had trouble finding out who he was and being this person. And Kara wasn`t him, had never been him. And supergirl wasn`t eather but instead of Supergirl he could have been Superboy (he had wanted to work on that title). 

But now that also was gone.   
So who was he? Who was Aidan when he wasn`t Kara or a hero? 

Of course he was Aidan but he wasn`t sure who that was or could be yet. Aidan hadn`t noticed the tears that were rushing down his cheeks until Maggie was there, hugging him and gently drawing circles across his back.   
“You will be okay little Danvers!” And for just the section of a moment, Aidan believed her.

When Aidan finally stopped crying, Maggie was still there. Still holding him.   
Aidan wasn`t sure that Maggie even realized how big this was for him. Just to believe that there could be a future. It meant a lot. 

“So”, Maggie looked him right in the eye. “When are you going to tell the others that you`re trans?” Aidan stopped in his movements. Had he heard her correctly? Had she really asked or was this just a hallucination? Shy as only Bambi could be, he looked at her.   
“What do you mean?”   
“Oh common. You were never good at hiding secrets little Danvers.”, Maggie smiled. She wasn`t making fun of him. She was genuinely asking.   
“How-how did you know?” 

“Well, it started when you stopped hugging everything that moved a few months ago.”, she send him a look. “You hug other people a lot. And to be honest? I kinda missed them. Your hugs are really comforting.” Aidan smiled, happy that people seemed to like his hugs.   
“But then you stopped. At first I didn`t think any of it but you also very drasticely changed your style. From tight dresses to button ups and jeans over night. That made me a bit suspicious. Of course it could just be you trying out something new but it was in such a short amount of time.” Aidan agreed with her. One day he just started wearing things he was more comfortable in.   
He had gotten a few interested looks in the office but no one said anything and otherwise it had mostly been good reactions.

“Then one day, I noticed that you were walking differently. There wasn`t any confidence. You were hunched over and even as supergirl, when you were trying to play the part, it always felt like you just wanted to wrap the cap around you and hide.”   
Once again, Aidan had to agree.   
“When you cut your hair, I honestly wasn`t very surprised. None the less you had Nia with you and it was the day after Nia had given a speech at the lgbt center where you had been very tense the whole time. Maggie ruffled through Aidans hair, which had gotten a bit longer again and they soon would have to cut it again. 

“Alex was really insensitive that day, wasn`t she?”, Maggie looked at him, a quiet apology in her eyes. “She shouldn`t have doubted that it was your choise when you did cut your hair.” They stayed quiet for a few moments.   
“Were you sure at that point?”, the blond asked.   
“I was pretty sure but not completely. But two days ago I found a list of names lying around and when I picked it up there was a `names for LD`, scribbled in the corner. And LD obviously stands for little Danvers.” Aidan laughed at the way Maggie seemed so proud of the fact that other people were using the nickname that she had given him. “And that was pretty much all it took. I`m guessing that Nia made that list?” The blond nodded.   
“There were some really good names on there. Have you already chosen one?” The kryptonian nodded. Maggie smiled and showed her dimples. “Wanna tell me which one?”   
“You only call me little Danvers anyway.”, the blond said, getting a light punch on the shoulder.   
People really liked to hit him there. Soon he would have to get some kind of armor to protect that spot. “Stop being all knowing and tell me.”   
The blond laughed.

“Of course officer. It`s Aiden.” Maggie raised and eyebrow. “Pretty name. You choose good!”   
Aidan smiled widely. “Thank you.”   
The brunette ruffled his hair again. “No problem LD.” “I knew you would only use the nickname!” Maggie laughed.   
“What can I say, you were right.” Aidan felt like a bit of weight has been lifted of his chest, as if it was somehow easier to breath. 

“Are you going to tell Alex and Lena?” Aidan bit his lip. “I want to but-“ “It`s scary.”, Maggie finished the sentence for him.   
He nodded. “You should know that Lena is already suspecting something. She didn`t really think anything when you changed your style and your hair because she`s way to horny, but she knows that something is up.” The blond wasn`t sure how to answer that.   
“She just wants what`s best for you!” But what if she won`t love Aidan the way she loved Kara?” 

Maggie sighed. “You really are insecure about this.”, she paused. “If anything, she will love you even more! She wants the real you. And if Aidan is the real you, then she will be head over heels in love with him! And she`ll probably be very turned on if you just told her that you`ll wear suits more often. And do you want a beard?”   
Aidan thought about it. Could he see himself with a beard? He nodded slightly.   
Maggie laughed. “Oh she will love you little one! Believe me. You two will be doing it like the rabbits and I`ll have some nephews to teach curse words too.”   
Aidan snorted.   
Why did everybody tell him that he and Lena would soon have kids?   
Had they all sworn a pact against them? He glanced at the brunette that was grinning happily.   
When he thought about it, they most likely had done that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I told you that Maggie knows everything;)


	20. The best food in the world!

Alex was staring out of the window.  
For a change, she had gone home from work and actually was trying to sleep for once. Outside it was getting dark. The last touches of light blue were being replaced with an almost black like color. She rubbed her eyes. God she was tired. But there was so much to be done. Without Supergirl the city was left to protect itself and being honest, they had a police force and all but against aliens with superpowers?

They just didn`t stand a chance. 

Eventually they had gotten Clark to step in from time to time. He was a bit annoyed that he now had to fly to national city that often but at least the people were staying save. Alex closed her eyes. She went through the events of the day. Waking up after falling asleep at work with a sore neck. Going to help Kara clean her wounds and then going on to deal with DEO duties.  
They had just gotten in a bunch of new agents that had some kinds of training but even the ones that had worked with the police before, were in no way up to the level of a federal agency. And of course there were great students.  
Like Averie who had just finished at yale and was recruited. Or Kyle. They were a little sassy but in the end they were a very nice pal that was passing the tests with flying colors and would go on to become a great agent. But of course, every group had its bad eggs. 

Apart from the two there were six others in the group and very annoyingly there was the one that Maggie had jokenly started to call Chad.  
And while Alex tried to remain professional, she couldn`t help but to grin because gosh, he was such a Chad. He had tried to flirt with everyone in the group and couldn`t shut up for the ever lasting span of five minutes and Alex wanted to throw something at him. Didn`t matter what. Just something to make the guy shut up for five minutes. She sighed. The redhead would have to plan the next training session for the five newcomers and while she didn`t want to completely exhaust them, they had to learn that work would be hard. She grinned sheepishly in thought of the tests that would wait for them at the end of the four first annual training months. They would crumble and maybe, if they were strong, would be able to talk. But they probably wouldn`t be able too. 

But Alex would have to figure out something for Kyle. They were wearing a binder and got easily dysphoric. And for the training session the people with boobs couldn`t wear anything that would compress their chests in a way that would make it difficult to train.  
Maybe She could tell Kyle that they should order a binder two sizes up? Would that help? She had no idea. Alex had never worn a binder and she never had to deal with that. Did Alex know someone that she could ask? Was their anyone that had ever worn a binder working in the DEO? If so, she didn`t know. A groan escaped her lips. Why was she always left to deal with stuff she didn`t know anything about? 

A hand settled on her shoulder. “Hey Danvers”, a voice said behind her. She turned around and longed forward to bury her face in her wifes hug. Maggie let her snuggle in and started pushing back some strands of Alex`s short hair. “What`s up with the hugging? Did anything happen at work?”  
Alex didn`t bother removing her face from Maggies collar bone. “Just tired” Maggie smiled at the attitudes of her wife. She placed a kiss on the side of her head. “Should I call the take out place?”, she asked.  
Alex nodded. “You have to let me go!”, Maggie laughed.  
Alex wrapped her arms around the smaller womans waist. “Don`t go!”, she murmured. “But I have to get to the phone.” Alex pouted. “Do you want Pizza or not?” It took another two minutes for Alex to let the brunette out of her grip. The redhead instantly missed the smaller ones touch. Once again, she pouted. Maggies lips curled up and before going off to get to the phone, she placed a quick kiss on the redheads lips.

Twenty minutes the two were snuggled up on the couch together, the pizza between them. “Hawaien Pizza is great!”, Maggie argued.  
Alex made a grimace. “It is! The sweet cancels out the saltiness! It`s tasty, is fastfood but gets health points!”  
Alex laughed. “That`s disgusting.”  
Maggie placed her feet on the couchtable. “Nah, it`s the perfect food!”  
“It`s really not!”  
“It is! If you would just give it a chance.”

Alex shook her head. “No way that I`ll eat that devil food.”  
The brunette placed a hand above her heart and leaned back in shock. “Who did I even marry?”  
The agent laughed. “Someone with taste.” Maggie took another bite of her pizza slice, enjoying the cheese mixing with the fruit. “I thought so too but than you told me you don`t like the best pizza in the world so you see why I have doubts?”  
Alex shot a glare over to the pizza. “No, your taste nerves must be dead!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, a chapter out of Alex`s perspective. I didnt have much time to write, because... well... school. I hate it. Also, who invented math? I would like to kills that person. What do you guys think of hawaien pizza? I love it. So tasty. Also, my aunt and her wife (who I meet once) are having another baby. Their two others kids are named like people I hate, so I hope they don`t go on with that trend. Like common. Name the kiddo Alec or something.  
> Anyway, have a great day:)


	21. The new agents

Around two weeks and nothing had really changed.   
Aidan was still bound to the bed, even though his wounds had almost completely healed. The superpowers that the kryptonian had lost, still hadn`t come back. He was getting a bit depressed since there was sign that his legs were getting better. 

Brainy would do physical training with him at least once a day. There Aidan would get an opportunity to stretch and later on they would work on getting his muscles to build up again, specifically the ones that were in his legs. The blond was getting stronger each day, but still he wasn`t able to walk. His muscles would start shaking and his feet would sometimes get no impulses at all.   
More than once Aidan had winded up lying on the ground. 

There was another reason for the sadness. 

He still hadn`t told Lena or Alex. Of course also not Eliza. He knew that Lena would be fine. Nia, Cat and Maggie had all told him that it would be alright. That Lena just wanted him to be happy but every time Aidan wanted to tell her his throat shut, his heart started racing and suddenly he was just a fourteen year old boy, unsure of what to say and insecure. 

“Kara”, Alex greeted him from the door. Aidan flinched. “How`s it going?”, the redhead asked. The blond shrugged is shoulders. “Okay I guess. Brainy was here half an hour ago and he said that the chances of me walking again are pretty high.”   
Alex nodded and smiled. “I`m glad that you`re better.”   
While that wasn`t exactly true according to his mental state but he didn`t want to worry here so he just didn`t react.

“I`m sorry that I`ve been… a bit tense.” The younger sibling raised an eyebrow. That wasn`t exactly how he would have put it. Tense…. She really hadn`t been tense. She had been aggressive. And Aidan understood that. There was a lot of responsibility resting on Alex`s shoulders but still that reasoning seemed a little blend when Alex was still angry with him when he already had apologized a thousand times. The blond hoped that the angry phase was over now. 

“It wasn`t fair to you. And I know that I reacted badly.” Aidan nodded. That captured it. “But I was just so worried. You are my little sister and I just have to keep you save. And you doing something that reckless doesn`t exactly make that easy.”   
The blond stared at the wall, feeling guilty again. Didn`t Alex realize that he knew that? She had told him around a thousand times. Those words were burned into his brain and they were there every time he woke up or tried to sleep.   
“I`m really sorry.”, Alex apolozied again, resting her hand on his arm. 

Aidan wanted to be mad. Wanted to be hurt by the words Alex had told him over the last few weeks but he couldn`t be.   
Alex just wanted to protect him.   
She had made it her mission to make sure that Aidan was save and he knew, that if something happened to the redhead, he would probably go crazy. That was what siblings were for. They drove each other crazy. They stole each others suits and did so much shit to make the other one mad.   
But they were also meant to sneak out at night, to team up against their parents. To fight over the tv remote and end up joking about scary movies that secretly scared both. To protect each other. Because in the end, siblings were the best frenemies and Aidan loved Alex so much. After first she had hated him, she had been the first person to make him feel human. 

Aidan opened his arms. “Come here” Alex longed forward and crashed in his arms. Aidan lifted his arms to hold Alex close. He took a breath. That was Alex. That was his sister. That was a save space, a piece of home. And he had missed being close with his older sister. There had been a lot of shit going on. Which was partly due to him figuring out who he was and then having the accident but also due to Alex being so stressed and not listening.   
But it would be fine.   
They were the Danvers siblings, they would make it. 

Aidan looked down at Alex who had closed her eyes. She looked tired. “Has anything happened?”, he asked curiously.   
Alex, still with her eyes closed, answered. “We got new agents and let me tell you, those young people are exhausting!” Aidan giggled. “There`s this guy, we just call him Chad. He doesn`t shut up. Seriously, he argues about everything!”   
The blond grinned. “Sounds familiar.” Alex shook her head. “He also flirts with everybody. It`s so annoying. He doesn`t let anyone just go on with their day. He already asked out Charles, Amy, Averie, Kyle and that other girl, Rosa.” Alex had counted them on her fingers.   
“Are these all the new agents?”, Aidan asked. “No, but there aren`t a lot left. And they are joking the whole time. Sometimes I don`t think that they take the whole thing as seriously as they should.”   
The redhead let the bond scratch her scalp. “I also have to figure out that thing with Kyle.”   
Aidan was curious. “What exactly?” 

“They are wearing a binder and they are a really good student but it`s really making training hard.” Aidan tensed up. “And I am not sure of what to do because in some months are physical tests and we can`t have someone that has trouble breathing because their chest is being compressed. Like, what am I supposed to do? Tell them to just not wear the binder?”   
Aidan stayed silent.   
“Kyle is nice but I don`t really understand why they are wearing a binder. Dysphoria can`t be that bad? Why shouldn`t they be able to go through a day without wearing that thing?”   
The blond was still silent, not wanting to say anything.   
His heart was beating fast. That wasn`t what he had wanted to talk about. And what did Alex mean? Did she just not understand dysphoria?  
Because most cis people could get an idea of it but never completely comprehend it. Or was she saying that it wasn`t real? What did she mean?   
He closed his eyes. Should he explain It to her? Or shouldn`t he? What that be suspicious.

“What do you think?”, Alex asked. Aidan shrugged his shoulders. “I don`t know. You should probably ask Nia.” The redhead nodded. “Good idea.” She stood up and smoothed over her shirt. “I`m gonna go. Bye sister.” She placed a kiss on his temple, than turned around and left. 

Aidan was left alone with his thoughts again.   
His hands shaking.   
What did Alex mean?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Who got the reference?


	22. The serum

“Hey little Danvers!”, Maggie said, coming into the hospital room.   
“Hi Maggie” The brunette raised an eyebrow. “Why do you look like somebody just killed a puppy?” Aidan looked down, his fingers tangling with one another. “Alex visited.”   
Maggie looked thoughtful. “I saw her walking down the corridor when I came here, she looked pretty happy. What happened?”   
The blond let his hand stroke through his hair. It was really getting to long again. “She just… said some things.”   
The cop stepped closer. “What did she say?” “Just something…” 

Maggie looked him in the eyes. “Please be more specific!” Aidan nodded. “She told me about the new agents, and apparently there`s a nonbinary person in the group.”   
Maggie wasn`t sure what to think of it. What the fuck had Alex said? “And soon they have the physical tests and Kyle seems to be wearing a binder.” Maggie noticed that the blond looked a little jealous while saying that. “And Alex asked what she should do about it. Because doing sports while wearing a binder doesn`t seem to be healthy.” 

The brunette actually agreed to that.   
Some years ago, during her training, she had a transguy in her group. And while he was a very good cop, he hated days that they had to do physical training. He looked athletic, broad shoulders, muscular arms and all but when the group had to go for a run he would always wind up being one of the last. His chest would be raising in a unusual manner and it sounded like he had an asthma attack. Once they actually had to cut the binder from his body because he had been binding for too long and there was too much pressure on his ribs.   
That day he had gone home with two broken ribs. After that he had to wear sport bras for training. And while he now was doing better and was always one of the firsts to reach the finish line, Maggie noticed that he was always gritting his teeth. 

Avoiding the look in the mirror while changing his clothes and all together didn`t seem very happy. But he made it, finished the training. Three months later he had gotten his top surgery. When he came back to the station, he looked a lot happier. And he would proudly train. When they had a team building day (which for them meant to go to go to the swimming pool and spend the day there) and he was looking so happy that he didn`t had to wear a binder or even worse, a swimming suit.   
Maggie would never forget his smile when she had congratulated on his abs.   
The boy had finally been happy with his body. 

“She said something along the lines if they couldn`t just go one day without binding.” Maggie noticed the confused look on Aidans face. “If dysphoria is something that is really that bad.” The brunette gave the younger one a sad smile. “And you don`t know what Alex exactly meant by that?”   
The blond nodded. Maggie took his right hand in hers. She noticed a long time ago that Aidan was somebody that didn`t just needed nice words to feel better. He was a very physical person. He needed somebody that would hug him, or hold his hand.   
“If you think that Alex doesn`t think that trans people are valid, I don`t think that`s true.” Aidan gave her a critical look.   
“First of all, Nia has always been a woman to her. Alex never said anything that could have made Nia feel uncomfortable in the slightest way.”   
Aidan bit his lip. “But what if that`s just because she doesn`t want to announce that publicly? That she only doesn`t say anything because Nia is there?”   
Maggie squeezed his hand.   
“Do you really think that?” 

Aidans baby blue eyes looked up at her. Maggies mimic was serious. “No. At least I don`t think so.” The brunette smiled. “I think that Alex is just educated on it. She had heard someone talk about dysphoria once. She isn`t an expert. But believe me, once she hears that you`re a guy, she will try to find out everything she can to help you. Like, everything. She will call doctors, do research and annoy every scientist in this city. Probably the whole continent.”   
Aidan laughed. That actually had made him feel better. 

“But that`s not why I came here.”, Maggie said. The blond asked: “Why then?” “Well, I got instructed by Lena to get you to her laboratory.”   
Aidan raised an eyebrow. “How and why?” Maggie shrugged. “I have no idea little one. But you know the little Luthor, if she tells you to do something, you do it.”   
Aidan snickered. “True.” Maggie stepped away from him. “Wait a second.” She went outside the room, when she came back she was pushing a wheelchair in front of her.   
“This,”, she patted the cushion. “This is Bertha.”  
“You named the chair?”   
“Shhhhhhhhh. Her name is Bertha, okay? And she helped me when I broke both my legs some years ago.”   
Aidan chuckled. “How did you break both your legs?”   
Maggie twisted her facial expression. “Let`s say, horses don`t really like me.”   
“Why the heck were you riding a horse?”   
“That`s unimportant. Let`s just get you in here so we can visit the little Luthor.” 

Lena was staring at a computer screen when Maggie and Aidan entered the room. Lena went over to them and gave Aidan a quick kiss. He smiled.   
“Hey.” Lena smiled.   
“hey back.” The brunette than lifted her head to greet Maggie. “So, you probably are wondering why I called you here.” The blond nodded. Lena was wearing a white coat. Her hair in a high ponytail. On her left sleeve seemed to be a glowing substance that Aidan wasn`t able to identify. “Well, I think that I managed to find a possibility to give you back your powers.” Aidan raised an eyebrow. Was she being serious? Did she? Or was this a bad prank. He looked his girlfriend in the eyes. The green, bluish color seemed to be sparkling and next to her eyes, light wrinkles of joy were drawn onto her face. She had to be serious. 

“And what is that possibility?” “Well, you know how green kryptonite makes you weak? And red kryptonite makes you… not evil but a bit angry.” Aidans face flinched. The red kryptonite incident was something that he remembered very well. He had thrown Cat off a building. That hadn`t been one of his best moments. “So, what`s up with that?” Lena smiled. “I started thinking, if I could combine the two. The red kryptonite makes you strong, but somehow I had to get the angry. So I managed to combine the two. The red kryptonite part is going to give you your powers back, if I calculated it right. And the green kryptonite will hopefully hold back your angry side.” 

Aidan nodded. That made sense. 

“It will basically turn around the functioning of your cells.” Maggie, who was standing next to Aidan, looked interested but also worried. “Are you sure that it`s save?” Lena twisted her neck. “We can`t be completely sure. It can be that nothing is going to happen.”   
“So I have nothing to lose?”, the alien asked, looking at the Luthor.   
She nodded.   
“I`ll do it.” Lena smiled and pressed a button that was build into the wall next to the computer. 

A minute went by of Aidan nervously pacing and Lena sending him calming looks. Than Alex came through a door. “It`s ready, you can come in.”   
Lena and Aidan went forward. Maggie stayed in the control room of the laboratory. The moment that Aidan stepped into the room, he noticed that something felt different. It was like something was pushing his body into a certain direction. Alex went to a table where multiple phials were placed. Aidan saw that they were filled with a sparkly liquid. When it didn`t seem like stars were shimmering inside it, the color purple was glimmering through. 

“It`s a serum.”, Lena explained. “We have to inject it right into your system.”   
Aidans eyes were focused on the phial that Alex had picked up and now was filtering it into a syringe. While Alex was doing that Lena motioned Aidan to remove his shirt sleeve from his arm and then continued to disinfect a spot where a vain was shining through. Alex had finished her task and was stepping closer. When they injected the serum, Aidan could feel the change within an instant.   
The world started to look clearer. The air smelled fresher and he could hear Maggie nervously tapping her food on the ground while waiting for him to come out again. 

“How do you feel?”, Lena asked. Aidan blinked. The sudden change in his vision was a bit irritating. “I feel good.”   
“Do you want to try standing up?”   
He nodded. As in the weeks before, he got on his feet. Before Aidan tried to take a step, he took a deep breath, hoping that it worked. When the kryptonian managed to walk, he started to stare at his feet with a happy expression. “It worked.” Alex and Lena highfived before Alex came closer to catch Aidan in a breathtaking hug.   
When she did let him go Lena looked at him proudly from across the room. He went over to her. “Thank you, both of you”, he said, while looking at Alex for a brief second. Lena looked happy. Aidan felt happy himself. Sure that he could do it he longed forward and lifted Lena into his arms. Lena demanded to be let down again but laughed when Aidan managed to lift both of them off the floor and flew in circles through the condoned space. 

Twenty minutes later, after Alex and Lena had checked his vitals, they allowed him to go. There was no doubt, he had his powers back. After being congratulated and hugged by Maggie, he snuck out of the building. Aidan had planned to visit Eliza. His mother deserved to see him healthy. She had visited them for two weeks but certain point she had to go home. With a freeing feeling in his chest, he took off and started flying through the sky.   
The cold breeze felt good. Like he belonged up here. He managed to fly with flocks of birds. The sunshine blending him from time to time. When he was half done with the way, he started to get a weird feeling. Like his lungs suddenly decided that they wouldn`t supply him with air anymore. He ignored it. But Aidan started to feel dizzy.

That wasn`t normal. 

The kryptonian hoped that he would still make it till Midvale. But when his sight started to go black, that hope was gone.   
Somehow the blond managed to land on a patch of earth next to a lake. What was happening? His last thought when he lost consciousness was what could have gone wrong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WEEKEND! FINALLY!   
> Have a great day:)


	23. Arriving in Midvale

The ground around him was soft. He could feel grass brushing against his cheek.   
Aidans body felt sore. Like he had been training the whole day and his muscles were burning. The blond felt to tired to even open up his eyes. Alex would say that he should get up, find a save location and to contact her. But he felt save.   
He was right in the middle of nowhere and the only sound reaching his ears was the singing of some birds. Nothing dangerous. So the kryptonian kep on liying there. 

At a certein point he had fallen asleep, again. Because when he woke up, it was dark around him, even after he hadopened his eyes. On the nightsky above him, stars wre shining brigthly and the moon was to be seen in it`s whole form of beauty. Aidan smiled. When the young alien finally managed to get up, he noticed that his body was still sore and his movements weren`t as gracefull. But the blond didn`t think anything of it.   
The important thing was to see if he still had his powers. After trying to hover just a tiny bit of space above the ground and being successfull with it, he decided that he still had enough stenght to reach Midvale. 

When Aidan landed on the farmgrounds, he didn`t expect Eliza to be still awake but as he looked through the windows, he noticed that the lights were still on. The kryptonian stepped to the doorsteps and pressed the bell and smiled when the sounds of an armchair being pushed back reached his ears. While waiting for Eliza to open the door, he nervously started fidgeting with his hands. The door opened and to be seen was Eliza.   
The older woman was already waring her pajamas and if Aidan had to guess, the blonde woman had been wanting to go to sleep for a while but had been hold up by some documentary that she just had to watch. "Hi", he greeted her, smiling warmly. If Aidan had expected a hug, that wasn`t what was coming next.   
"Who are you?", Eliza asked. 

Aidan raised an eyebrow. Was she kidding? "It`s Kara", Aidan deadnamed himself. The blonde looked him up and down and shook her head.   
"No, you definitely not my daughter."   
What was going on?   
"If I wasn`t your kid, how would I know about the one christmas you made Alex and me bake cookies to give them out at school but we ended up eating them ourselfs so that you had to run to the next shop to get cookies that definitelly weren`t made with love?"   
Elizas eyes widened. "But, what?", she asked. 

Aidan was confused. What was her problem? "What`s the problem?" Eliza looked him in the eyes. She seemed to have trouble finding the right words. Instead of saying anything, she pulled him into the house, where the already dimmed lights still blinded the blond momentarely.   
Still not being able to see, she lead him up the stairs and into a room, Aidan guessed was the bathroom. But were they doing here? Eliza placed him in front of the mirror.   
Aidan looked at his reflection, expecting the usual figure to stare back, but to his surprise, that wasn`t the case. 

A young man was staring back at him. He was tall, a bit taller than Kara had been. His shoulders were broad, that much he could see, even though he was wearing a hoodie. That guys face was symetrical, except for a small scar right above his left eyebrow. He had a strong jaw and high cheekbones.   
If Aidan looked closely, he could even see the hint of a shadow across his jaw. The guys hair was cut short, but as if he needed to go to the barber soon and some strands were falling before his eyes. But what Aidan shocked most, was that this man, that was admittingly hot, had his eyes. The same baby blue, warm color. Aidan raised his fingers and let them stroke along his jaw. Letting them take in the stricter form of his nose.   
Letting them feel the light stubble on his chin.   
Aidan, was a man.   
But how? 

He turned around to see Eliza still standing there, taking in his unfamiliar figure.   
"Kara-", she said but still couldn`t speak.   
He bit his lip.   
How would he explain that to her?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I haad to repost this chapter because it didn`t edit it the way I wanted it.


	24. How to tell your mother

Aidan was pacing around the living room, his foot tapping the wooden floor again and again.   
Eliza had gone off to the kitchen to prepare some tea that would calm both of them down. So he was left alone to think of a way to explain everything, which was easily said but not easily done.   
Should he tell her in a strict forward way? Just telling her that this was who he was supposed to be? That it was some kind of failed serum that had given him this body?   
That he didn`t exactly knew how it happened or if it would have Consicences to his physical health? Would that worry her? 

Probably. 

The older woman came back from the kitchen and placed to mugs on the table from which now the scent of strawberry was spreading throughout the room. She motioned the kryptonian to sit down next to her. After Aidan had taken his place on the sofa, and he held a mug in his shaking hands, Eliza looked him right in the eye.   
“So, what`s up with… all this.”, she motioned toward his body.   
He sighed and gritted his teeth. “Today Alex and Maggie gave me serum which was supposed to give me my powers back.”   
Eliza nodded, the two woman probably had told her that. “And it did. Everything was alright. So I flew off to come and visit you.”   
Eliza raised an eyebrow. “But on the way something happened?” Aidan raised his right hand to brush back a strand of his hair. “Yeah, I suddenly had trouble breathing and at first I didn`t really think any of it but I also started to get dizzy and I didn`t feel save to fly anymore.”   
“So what did you do?”   
“I landed on a pitch of land next to a lake and passed out there.” 

Eliza looked at him with worried eyes. “You just passed out like that?”   
He nodded. “When I woke up it was already dark and I noticed that my whole body just felt sore, but I had passed out and slept on the ground for multiple hours, so I thought that that was normal.”   
“And then you decided to come here instead of flying back to the DEO?”   
Aidan nodded once again. “And when you came here and I pushed you in front of a mirror you realized that you were a man?” Aidan fidgeted with his hands.   
“What are we going to do about this? Alex and Lena probably will have to make another serum turn you back into a woman.” 

The kryptonian didn`t say anything.   
Eliza looked at him curiously. “Right?”   
He stayed quiet.  
“Kara, do you want to tell me something?”   
The blond looked at his mother. The fear written into his gaze. “You can tell me everything!”   
Aidan nodded. He took a deep breath. “I- I don`t want my old body back.” Eliza took his hand into hers. Aidan now realized how much smaller Elizas hands were than his.   
“And why is that?”   
“I, I am a man.” 

The older woman smiled sadly. “How long have you known that?”   
He avoided her gaze. “Two months. Since that I`ve been sure but it always felt like I was just playing a part in a play. Like this part of Kara had been given to me and I would just have to follow the script.”   
Eliza drew calming circles onto the back of his hand. “And what should I call you?”   
“Aidan” 

Eliza smiled. “Then Aidan it is.” She raised a hand and caressed his jaw.   
“A particular reason for that name?”   
Aidans eyes seemed to shine a little brighter. “My grandfather. His name was Aidan and he was one of the best people that I`ve ever known.”   
The blonde nodded. “Does anyone else know?”   
The kryptonian took some seconds to respond. “Cat Grant knew first. She knew before me.”, he smiled. Eliza laughed. “Sounds just like her.” At the surprised look on Aidans face she added: “I meet her once. She`s an interesting woman.”   
The blond had to agree with that. 

“After that I told Nia. She was the one that helped me to be sure and also took me to the hair stylist.” He paused. “She then proceeded to make a list on names. But since I already had chosen she didn`t get it right. Cat did though. She had put only one name on the list and that name had been Aidan.”   
Eliza laughed. “Cat is a very smart woman!”   
“After that Maggie told me that she knew. And that should be all.” Eliza looked interested. “Three people? That`s a lot.” 

The blond looked at his mother, scared to see disappointment in her eyes. But there was none. “So Lena and Alex don`t know?” “No… I was too scared to tell Lena and Alex… well, Alex is Alex.” Eliza seemed to understand that. The older woman knew how the redhead could be.   
“You know that Lena will be fine with it?”   
Indeed he did. Everybody had told him. But that didn`t change the fact that he was still too scared. It wasn`t about her being ready to hear it. It was about him being ready to say it.   
But now the blond would have no other choice. 

“Should I go and call the DEO?” Aidan shook his head in an almost violent manner.   
“Why not?” “I just want them to make all the examination today. All the questions and the feelings. It`s exhausting.” Eliza looked at him with vary eyes. “You know that can`t hide here forever? You will have to tell them at a certain point.”   
The alien knew that but still he was dreading it. It wasn`t something he was excited to do.   
“I know. But not tonight.” Eliza nodded.   
“Do you want a hug?”, she asked. Aidan smiled and let himself sink into her arms. With his head buried into her shoulder he asked: “Are you really fine with it?”   
Eliza looked down at him and tightened her grip around him.   
“You know, I always wanted a son.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I had to reupload the last chapter because it didn`t edit it, so I lost all your comments. I had read them before though and answered some of them. If you still want them to be answered, please comment again and I`ll do so.  
> Also, I`m really proud of the title of this chapter.   
> Have a great day:)


	25. Breakfast with pancakes

In the morning Aidan woke up with a blanking spread across him. From the kitchen he could smell pancakes.  
Where was he? What had happened?  
It couldn`t be Lena that was cooking there. Lena wasn`t really a cook. Most nights the two would get eather Alex and Maggie to give them some food (Maggie was an surprisingly good cook) or they would order take out.  
Which always worked out great even though Aidan had to retain his girlfriend mire than once from buying the take out place. And to be honest, he wouldn`t complain if Lena were to buy the place. But the brunette couldn`t just go around the place and buy everything that the two oft hem liked.  
That just wasn`t an option. Slowly the memorys from the last evening started to come back. He had told Eliza. And she had taken it well. And there had been something else… He wasn`t quiet sure what it was. 

Aidan stretched his limbs and than still sleepy, got up. He nodded into the direction where he guessed Eliza to stand and went up the stairs. In the bathroom he got his toothbrush ready. He didn`t bother looking into the mirror. Just when he spit out the toothpaste he looked and immidiatly, he stopped. Wait? What? Right, he now had the body of a cis man. That he somehow had repressed. In the daylight, he noticed that his hairline also had changed a bit. It had slpped a bitt o the front and it looked like it also was a tinch darker than it had been before. The ligh shadow that had been there the daay before was now even more noticeable.  
Aidan grinned at his reflection. It maybe was a bit arrogant, but he looked good. There was no denying that. 

He looked down at himself. The blond was still wearing the hoodie and the sweatpants he had woren yesterday. The alien went down tot he kitchen and waited till his mother turned around to look at him.  
"Morning sweety“, the older woman greeted him. "Hey mom.“ "Is there something you want?“, the blonde asked. Aidan nodded. "Yes, you wouldn`t happen to have some other clothes? I`m sure that the button ups that are in my old closet are too small.“ Eliza stopped in her movements.  
"In fact I do. You know, I could never bring myself to throw out Jeremiahs clothes. So they are still in the closet in the bedroom.“ Aidan smiled and gave his mother a quick kiss on the cheek. "Thanks mom.“ 

He went upstairs looking fort he clothes. Jeremiah had mostly practical clothes. Blue jeans, some flannels in beige colors, those deserved tob e thrown into the trash. In the end, Aidan decided on a pair of black jeans, a dark blue button up and suspenders. He than continued to jump into the shower. Luckily for him, he and Jeremiah almost had the same size. Even though the button up was a little loose around his stomach.  
The blond went up to a mirror to take in his looks. He almost couldn`t contain his smile. He was a man. And the clothes looked good. And while the blond was nervous that he would have to tell his friend very soon, the light feeling in his (pretty muscular) chest was fighting against it in a strong way. 

He went downstairs where Eliza had set up the table fort he two of them. When she saw him her lips twisted upwards. „What do you think?“ He made a piruette. "You look incredibly handsom.“  
Aidan raised an eyebrow. "Handsom? Since when ist hat a word to describe me?“ Eliza laughed. "Okay, you look fabulous.“  
Satisfied with the answer, Aidan sat down. The two ate with a constant chatter going on between them. 

When the alien had finished hiss tack of pancakes, Eliza looked at him, more seriouse this time. "Now, do you think that it`s time we call the DEO?“ The kryptonian bit his lip. He didn`t want to leave the little bubble that this place was. Here he could just be Aidan. If they went and called the DEO now, there were going tob e questions and that wasn`t something that he would ever be prepared for. But instead of dreading it into the near future, he nodded and let Elizsa reach fort he phone. While the older woman was dialing the number of Alex`s phone, Aidan looked nervously though the kitchen window, through which sunshine was coming in. 

"Hey Alex“, appearently his mom had reached the redhead. „Yes, yes I`m fine. But I have Kara here.“, she looked at Aidan with an apologizing look. "If there is a problem? I mean, kinda, but not really…“ Eliza let her daughter talk on. Giving Aidan comforting looks. "So, you and some other people will be here in around three hours?“ Aidan looked at the clock that was hanging next tot he spice shelf. It was eleven o`clock. So they would be here at two.  
That left him some more time to mentally prepare himself. 

"Love you too. See you later sweety.“ Eliza hang up and looked at her son who was still sitting at the table, trying not to look to nervous. „It`s gonna be alright!“, she promissed. "But what if it won`t be? What if Alex doesn`t want me tob e her brother?“ Elizas facial expression turned into something stoic. "If that happens, I`ll kick her ass.“  
Aidan laughed. "You know that`s she`s an agent with a lot of fighting exprience?“  
"And? What about it? I´m her mother and I`ll whoop her ass. If she does something stupid she`ll crawl by the next day to tell you how sorry she is. I promise you that much! Also, do you really think that Maggie is gonna let Alex do something dumb?“  
Aidan weighed up the possibilities. "No, that`s probably not gonna happen.“  
"Seriously, Maggie has some kind of spell.“ Aidan grinned. „I think it`s just the promise that Alex would have to sleep on the couch and you know how easily Alex get back pain when she hast o lay on the couch.“  
Eliza nodded. "What are we gonna do till your sister comes here to pick you up?“ 

The younger man looked at his mom with a hopefull grin. "We could annoy your neighbour?“  
Eliza slapped him on the back of his head. "We only did that once and it was because he had screamed at you and Alex for no reason!“ Eliza looked her son in the eyes.  
And of course, he was giving her puppy eyes. And she had been his mother for over a decade and still she wasn`t immune to that.  
She sighed. "Okay, go get the toilet paper!“ Almost vibrating, Aidan ran to get the supplies while Eliza looked into the fridge to find some eggs.  
This was a bad idea, and she knew that. But Aidan looked so happy and how could she possibly deny him that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> He`s gonna tell Alex soon. I`m most excited about getting write Lenas reaction.  
> Have a great day:)


	26. This is me

Eliza and Aidan were sneaking out of the farm realms.   
Next to them, placed on a for front of grass was a house. It was a lot more swanky than the Danvers house. Next to the front doors gryffons, that looked like they were made out of gold were made to look down at you. Aidan shook his head. He really didn`t like the guy that lived here.   
When he and Alex had stepped foot onto his grounds when they were younger he would start to scream, you would have thought that world war three had broken out. Eliza was holding the eggs and now reached over to give him two. They were standing within a ten meter distance, just close enough for them to unerringly aim. Aidan grinned and lifted his arm. The eggshell cracked open when it hit the façade. “That`s going to leave some stains.”, Eliza noticed. “I know!”

Twenty minutes the two were running away with a balding man running behind them, angrily screaming. “You know that he knows that it was us?”, Eliza yelled, still running. “He`s gonna make you clean the house.” Aidan lifted an eyebrow. “And why just me? You were also there.” The blonde laughed. “It was your idea and I´m the adult so I am the responsible one that`s gonna tell you to be better.” What else had Aidan even expected. 

When mother and son came back to the house, they let themselves on the sofa.   
Eliza was breathing uneven. "That was fun.” Aidan agreed. At a certain point they were giving out points. Hitting a window with an egg was the highest score. 

Fifty points. 

Clearly they tried to achieve the highest score possible but when Aidan threw an egg with just a bit too much force, the window broke into a thousand pieces. Which of course, alerted the neighbor to come running to the front of the house.   
He was overreacting a bit if you asked Aidan but nobody would. He would just have to come to terms with the fact that he would have to spend a day in the near future cleaning up the house.   
He groaned. 

“Common, you`re young an dynamic. It won`t be difficult for you.”   
“Mother, I am fifty. I`m not that young!”   
The older woman snorted. “I forgot, should I just put your meals in the blender before thanksgiving?”   
Aidan looked at her with wide eyes. “You wouldn`t!” Eliza looked at him daringly. “Please, you really want to find out?” The younger one shook his head, horrified due to the methods his mother would use. 

The duo spend the rest of the time on the couch watching tv show reruns. “You`ve seen this a thousand times!”, Aidan complained when NCIS came on. Eliza didn`t even bother to look at him.   
“And? I can always look at Gibbs.”   
The blond shook his head. “Oh common, don`t pretend you didn`t have a crush on Dinozzo and Ziva!” Aidan hid his face away in the padding of the couch.   
“Are you serious?” “You know it`s true.” He groaned. The blond clearly spent too much time with his mother when he was a teenager. “By the way, when am I getting grandchildren?” “You`ve got to be kidding me.” Eliza smiled. “I am expecting an answer.” 

Aidan looked up, cursing Raoh on the inside.   
“We aren`t even married!”, he said, thinking that this argument would help.   
“And? Jeremiah and I also got Alex before we were married.” She smiled. “I mean, it was kind of an accident but-“   
“Stop talking, please!”, Aidan said.   
“We went to the lake and you know, we had our wild sides-“ 

Aidan pressed his hands against his ears. That wasn`t something that he ever needed to know! Just the thought of it was was…. brhhhh. When he finally lifted his hands of his ears, Eliza was grinning at him.   
“And? When am I getting grandchildren?”   
“Within the next two years. Just please, never talk about your… wild side again.” It shook his whole body at this image.   
Eliza was still grinning. “Deal.” 

They managed to get through the next hours without talking about stuff like this.   
Much to Aidans joy. When it rang on the door, the nervousness that the kryptonian had managed to push back in the backrounds of his head, showed up again. Eliza got up and went over to the door.   
“Hello mom”, Alex greeted her mother with a kiss on the cheek. “Hello to you too.” The blonde let the redhead in smilingly.   
Behind her Maggie and J`onn were standing. She waved at them. 

“You said that Kara is here?” Eliza nodded. “And that there is… sort of a problem?” The older woman nodded again.   
“Where is she?” Eliza led them to the living room where Aidan was still sitting on the couch. His hands fidgeting on his lab. Alex saw him in an instant. Her eyes transformed into slits. “Who is that?”, the readhead asked, raising her gun to point at the young man. 

“Alex, put away your gun!”, Eliza commanded her daughter. Alex shook her head. “I don`t know who he is and he is in your house! so no, I won`t put the gun down.” The gun was still pointing at Aidan, who with calm eyes lifted his arms to show that he was no danger to anyone in the room. Behind Alex he was able to catch Maggies eyes. The brunette had her head tilted to the side. As if she wasn`t sure that what she was seeing was indeed, real. He nodded at her. 

The cops eyes widened. In surprise she ignored the redhead standing in front of her and asked “Are you serious?” He nodded again.   
Maggie walked past Alex, put down her gun and while hugging the blond said: “He`s no danger, believe me!”   
She looked him up and down. “Damn LD!”   
Aidan laughed.   
She poked her finger into his stomach. “Are you made of stone?”, the cop asked jokingly. Aidan raised a hand to stroke them through his hair. “Some would say that I`m made out of steel.”   
Maggie snorted. “Your jokes are bad.”, she stated. Aidan laughed. 

Alex was looking at the two with a confused look. “You know him?” Maggie nodded. “Yes, yes I do.” The redhead now was the one to tilt her head. The guy looked familiar. But where did she know him from. J`onn stepped in front, his eyes wide in surprise.   
“Alex?” The redhead looked at the tall man. “Yeah?” “This appears to be Kara.” 

Alex was sure that she misheard. That wasn`t Kara! Kara was her little sister, not some tall guy. “You must be joking.”, she said, not lifting her eyes off the blond figure in the living room.   
“I am really not. This is Kara!” Alex`s face blanched. J`onn was a mindreader and to trick him you had to be a species from the fith dimension. 

“kara?” Alex noticed how the blonde flinched. That was her little sister? What had happened? “Are you alright?”   
Kara looked at her. Alex looked at the younger one with worried eyes. 

“Yes, I`m alright.”, Aidan gulped. “What happened to you? Are you in pain? We have to get you back to the DEO! I will instantly start working on something to turn you back into Kara!”, the redhead promised.   
Aidan looked at his older sister with sad eyes. This wasn`t how this was supposed to go. “I promise, you will be your normal self in no time!” He flinched.   
He knew that Alex didn`t knew and didn`t mean it but those words hit like a knife. 

Aidan interrupted the redhead before she could say something else. ”Alex, there`s something that I`ve been meaning to tell you.”   
It was suddenly very hot in the room. He looked at Eliza who was smiling at him. The blond looked at Maggie, was giving him a thumbs up. “What is it Kara?”, Alex asked. Aidan swallowed. tried to find the courage. “This”, he moved his hands, pointing at his body. “This is me.”   
Alex raised an eyebrow. “I`m not sure if I know what you mean.”   
The kryptonian sighed. “I`m trans, Alex.” 

The redhead took a step back, shaking her head. “No, you`re Kara!”   
The blond smiled sadly. “I am Aidan.”, he introduced himself to the redhead.  
“No, you are Kara!” Alex seemed tense. Aidan flinched. “believe me Alex, I am not Kara! I am your brother though.” 

The older one shook her head again. “When did you get this idea?”, she whispered.   
Aidan raised an eyebrow. “Idea? This isn`t just an `ìdea`!”   
Alex was still in denial. “I know that the last month was hard on you! It was difficult for all of us but that doesn`t mean that you`re-“ Aidan broke her off. “That I`m what?”   
Alex looked him in the eyes. “That you´re someone you`re not!” 

Aidan looked at his sister. He couldn`t believe it. Did she really just say that? He ignored the concerned looks on his friends faces. He stepped past the redhead and before he was fully out the door he turned around once more. “This is me!” The kryptonian flew away, leaving his friends staring at the redhead. 

“Alexandra Danvers!” Eliza whispered. Alex looked her mother.   
“What?” “How could you say that to him?” Alex apparently wasn`t aware of the fact that she did something wrong.   
“She is clearly confused! Just give her some time to come to her senses.”   
Maggie looked at her wife. “It`s you who has to come to their senses.”, she shook her head.   
The brunette couldn`t believe that her wife could say something like this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...Please don`t yell at me


	27. Just another assasination

Lena was just trying to enjoy a nice cup of coffee. How could it be that everybody seemed to have something against that? First that guy that insisted he had a meeting with her. And after five minutes she had gotten so annoyed that even after Jess had checked the planner (in which the guy had no meeting with her), that she still did hear out his idea. And this idea ended up being about kicking aliens out.   
So not really something that she wanted to follow up to. After that Jess, her secretary had come stormed in again and had thrown a staple of files in front of her. Those had just come out of the labor. And she had to look at them now. After asking the other woman if she couldn`t just do it later, Jess looked at her as if she was a little crazy. “Have you meet the scientists that work down there? You have to look at it and that should better be now!” 

Lena had sighed but she had started going through the files, even if she would make sounds of disapproval. Not that anybody could hear. Lena had been on edge since yesterday. Kara had flown away and since than she hadn`t heard from her girlfriend.   
And it worried her.   
The blonde woman had just taken a serum that had only existed for around two day. 

Nobody knew what the side effects could be or if it even had some. In her conclusion it would definitely have some. It was kryptonite and kryptonite had always some kind of cue. The ravenette tried to concentrate on the documents again. The cup of coffee getting cold right in front of her. Suddenly a shrill sound started to echo through the building. The alarm system. Lena was at this point in her career at which she didn`t really care about that anymore. Every few weeks that system would go off and some type of criminal would start to go after her or her inventions. 

And it wasn`t like it wasn`t scary, it was just that after the three hundreds time it got a little boring. The CEO still got up from her chair and stepped in front of the office. According to the plans, Jess would now have to guide her to the save room. As if she couldn`t find it herself. Jess looked up from the documents she was working on. “We`re still doing that?” Lenas lips curled up. “Apparently.” The secretary groaned. “You would think that those bad guys would learn that you seem to be immortal.” 

Lena laughed. She liked that logic. But still they both went down the next corridor, thinking that the bad guys were still on the second floor and not the fiftieth, which Lenas office were on. “Do you think that the people that work on the first floor are save?”, Jess asked. The ravenette bit her lip. That was the only part of those assassinations that still scared her. 

She already had given up on the press conferences because on each and everyone, someone had tried to kill her. Jess had to yell at her before she cancelled them though. But she wasn`t able to prevent them from happening in her own building.   
And security guards had already been hired. It was just a fact that they seemed to be useless. “Jess?” The woman looked at her. “Yes?” “Remind me to hire a new security.” 

They hadn`t reached the save room yet when the duo heard people walking down the floor. That was more than suspicious. Every storey had it`s own save room (that Lena had made sure of) so that the people that worked on the other ones should hide in their own and now waste time by changing the story.   
“Jess?”   
The secretarys eyes had widened.   
“Please tell that there are high chances that those are employees?” 

Lena really just wanted it to be the case for once. 

Jess rolled her eyes. “We both know that that won`t be the case.”   
The ravenette stared at the floor. “I know. But let a woman have hope!” Around the corner the steps were getting closer. It were four man that were wearing all black with guns in their hands.   
“How does the security not realize that the guys that are wearing all black AND black overalls COULD be the bad guys?” Jess snorted. “That`s why I`m supposed to remind you to higher new guards.”   
Lena nodded. Those guys were coming nearer and the two woman were trying to silently get back to her office but in the end that was a useless try. 

The badguys saw them and started running torwards them. “RUN!”, Jess yelled at Lena. And even though, this was indeed a dangerous situation, she couldn`t help herself. “No, I thought I would just waddle away from the bad guys.” Jess rolled her eyes. “Do you REALLY think that THIS is the right time for sarcasm?” Lena shrugged her shoulders. “I mean, it could be the last time so why not?”   
The secretary started at her with squeezed eyes. “Are you kidding me?”, she hissed.   
The ravenette shrugged her shoulders once again. “I mean, they have guns! The could kill us!”, Jess said with a panicking voice. 

Lena laughed. “I also could slip on a banana peel and break my neck but that possibility is pretty slim, isn`t it.”   
Jess seemed to be close to punching the wall. 

“Miss Luthor, raise your hands above your head so we can see them!” A pale dude with a shaved head had spoken. Jess raised her hands in an instant while Lena looked at those guys with an annoyed eye roll. “And? Who send you hear and why? Jess? Let`s bet it`s because I`m a Luthor!” The other woman stared at her in disbelieve. She had worked for the ravenette for over three years and still the recklessness of that woman astonished her every time. “When this is over I`m getting you a fucking therapist.” She paused and stared at the guys and took in there figures. “I`m with you on those guys. They are definitely here because you`re   
a Luthor. But I also expand my tip to the fact that Lex send them here.”   
Lena looked at here in surprise. “Why that?” 

The two woman were completely ignoring the bad guys. “Look at them, not one has a full head of hair.”   
Lena laughed. “Okay, you`re on. So, who send you?” The guy who had spoken before had lowered his gun in surprise. When being talked to, he raised it again. “Lex Luthor did indeed hire us.” Jess squeaked happily. “Ha! I win.”   
While the bad guys were still trying to come to terms with the two woman not being scared, Lena could hear glass break. Could that be Kara?   
After a few seconds, Lena could see a blue streak hurry through the corridors. The CEO couldn`t even see what happened but three seconds later the bad guys were tied up and lying on the floor. Lena looked up, expecting to see Kara. But to her surprise, it wasn`t. A tall blond man was hovering above the man. 

“Who are you working for?”, he asked, sounding angry. None of the man answered. The blond man grabbed the pale guys chin. “I am asking you one more time!” The guy seemed to be shivering. “Lex Luthor.”, the tied up criminal managed to spit out. The blond let him go and turned around to the two woman that were still standing there in shock. “And you? You are supposed to be in the save room! But instead you are here making jokes with your secretary?” His voice was calm but also sounded rough and angry.   
“Jess, I expected better from you.” Jess didn`t seem to know him eather but still she lowered her gaze. 

He looked at Lena again. There was something familiar about him but his facial features were drawn into an angry grimace. “You have to take this stuff seriously! They had loaded guns!”, the tall man pointed at the weapons lying next to the bunch of criminals. “Who do you think you are that you can tell me what to do?” His facial features were still cranked up. “Because I don`t know you so I don`t think that you have any kind of authority to tell me how I`m supposed to handle this kind of situations.”   
His features softened and Lena noticed that she could tell that he was hurt. He nodded. “Of course. You`re right.”   
The blond man stepped away from them and went back to were he had come from. Jess looked at Lena with raised eyebrows. “What was that?” The Luthor shrugged. “I have no idea.” 

When Lena got home some hours later she just wanted to lay down on the couch and watch some episodes of two broke girls. She hung up her coat on the hook. The CEO went to her bedroom and changed into more comfortable clothes. The Luthor went to the kitchen to make herself some tea. It had been a stressful day and she needed something to calm down. When she looked out the window she managed to catch a glimpse of the balcony. There was someone on there. 

She sighed.   
Not again. 

Lena grabbed her pepper spray and calmly went onto the balcony. It was the guy from earlier. His tall frame was leaned onto the ceiling and staring into the sky. “What are you doing here?” He turned around and Lena saw that he was… crying? “What are you doing here?”   
The blond focused his gaze onto the city again. “Just… coming by.” Lena didn`t believe him. She stepped closer and leaned against the spot on the ceiling next to him. “And why were you crying?” The blond laughed. It sounded broken. “I just told someone something today and they didn`t have the best reaction.”   
Lena nodded. She knew that feeling. “Earlier you seemed to have superpowers. Are you an alien?” 

The blond smiled. “Yes” “Where are you from?” He paused and stared at the different colors that were drawn onto the sky. “It doesn`t matter. My home isn`t there anymore.”   
Lena felt a shiver creeping up her spine. This story sounded familiar. “What did you tell this person?” He sighed. He looked at her and in the moment that his baby blue eyes looked into Lenas greens, she knew.   
“I told her who I am.”   
“Kara?” 

Lena noticed how the alien smiled. “Is that you Kara?”, the CEO asked again.   
He nodded and started fidgeting his fingers. “What happened?” “I believe that it was something in your serum.”   
She nodded. So that was the side affect. “And what exactly did you tell this person?”   
Kara looked at her. “That I am not Kara.” 

Lena raised an eyebrow. “What do you mean by that?”   
The blonde looked at her and Lena could see tears streaming down the aliens face. “This, this is me. Always was supposed to be.”   
The ravenette nodded. She had realized that Kara had been more distant. She had hoped that it wouldn`t be something this drastic but now that she knew she would do everything to make the blonde feel better. “What pronouns should I use than?” 

The alien smiled. “He, him.” Lena rested her hand above his. “And what`s your name?”   
“Aidan” Lena paused to let the new name settle in. “Aidan Danvers?”   
He had hope in his eyes when she said that. But the Luthor could also see the fear hiding openly in the deep blue.   
“I like it” 

Aidans smile was brighter than the sun. 

“You know that this won`t change anything except that you`re my boyfriend now? This won`t get you out of commitment!”   
Aidan laughed. His laugh was deep but Lena could still hear the familiar almost melodic sound that he used to do before. It sounded wonderful. 

“I wouldn`t want to get out.” He turned his hand around and entangled his fingers with her. “You have catched me, Miss Luthor. Me, my heart and I wouldn`t have it any other way.”   
He smiled at Lena with so much love in his eyes.   
The blond raised his other hand and gently caressed her cheek. The brunette leaned into the touch. Aidan leaned forward. Before something could happen he looked at Lena, asking for her consent.   
She smiled and nodded. 

Their kisses had always felt good. But when his lips touched hers this time, it wasn`t the usual feeling of a firework exploding in her chest. It was a calm feeling.   
Quiet but bright as the sun and as cool as the moon.   
Full of love. She had her hands folded behind his neck while Aidans were placed on her hip. Their kissed had always been fantastic and Lena hadn`t thought that it could ever get better. But this kiss was slow and it felt like home.   
"I love you", Aidan whispered.  
Lena smiled against his lips. "I love you too, Aidan Danvers."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just love Jess. She was the only seceretary Lena could trust.  
> And I know, the end was a bit cheesy. I hope you guys still like it.  
> Have a great day:)


	28. She`s confused!

When the couple seperated from each other, Lena took her time to look up and down Aidan.   
What Lena hadn`t realized before, was just how broad the aliens shoulders were. And how much the suspenders actually flattered the blonds figure. She knew that Aidan had abs as Kara but how would they look on Aidan? Lena blushed. And of course, the handsome beefcake in front of her noticed. "Is everything alright?" The brunette nodded and thanked god for Aidans innocents. “Yeah, everything`s fine.” He smiled at her and placed a kiss on her temple. 

“I`m sorry for being so distant in the last few months.”   
Lena shook her head. “It`s alright. You had stuff to figure out.” The blond looked at the ravenette with a sad look. “It still wasn`t fair to you. You only ever supported me and I shut you out. I should have talked to you.” Lena wanted to make him feel better. Make him understand that she understood why he did it. But she was also aware that probably nothing she was going to say would help. “You weren`t ready to tell me. It`s alright and I understand. You have to understand that I`m not mad!” 

Aidan refused to look her in the eyes. “Hey, I promise. We are okay now.” His blue eyes meet her greens and Lena smiled at the familiar color. “So, who was the person that react so bad?” The blond bit his lip. Lena desperately wished that it wouldn`t turn out to be the person that she thought. 

“Alex.” 

Fuck.   
So that was that. Exactly the person she thought had done it. “What did she say?” “That I was just confused and that she would turn me back into a woman.”   
Lena sighed. She wanted to punch the redhead. “Are you going to confront her?” Aidan stepped back. Oh no, he was withdrawing himself again.   
“I mean, I guess I will have to…” He sounded so unsure. As if he didn´t know if he was actually going to do it. “You will have to talk to Alex!” The blond looked uncomfortable just at the thought of it.   
“She is your sister. You are the Danvers sis-siblings!” 

Aidan flinched. He had definitely heard it. She wanted to just be able to call him Aidan and all of it.   
Everything to make him comfortable. But while she wanted to do that her brain still thought of Aidan as Kara. And while she tried to shut that down, that would be there for a while.   
Lena had known the kryptonian for years now and had a romantic relationship. And through all of this she had always called him Kara. Her boyfriend had been her girlfriend. That wasn`t something she would be able to change within a day. The Luthor knew that he understood that. But she still felt bad. 

“I want to talk to Alex but she just made perfectly clear what she thinks and maybe it`s enough to just let her think about it for some time. There`s no need to rush it.” Yeah, there was no need to rush it in the sense of that they had years to clear that. But Ka-Aidan had a very close relationship with his sister. She was his hero and her approval meant everything to the kryptonian. But Lena decided that she wouldn`t push it today. It was probably best if she would bring Aidan home and they would eat something. Just enjoy their time before confronting the redhead.   
“Do you want to come in? We can order Poststicker and eat icecream?”   
Aidan smiled. “Yes, I would like that.”

Alex still wasn`t aware that she had done anything bad. In her opinion she was just trying to protect her baby sister.   
She was sitting on the couch in Midvale and rolling her eyes at Maggie and her mother who were arguing in the kitchen. From what Alex knew the two were trying to decide who was going to talk to Alex first. She truly didn`t know who was going to win this battle. Both woman had very strong and stubborn personalities. 

Finally, Eliza came out of the kitchen. The blonde had a expression carved in stone. “Alexandra?” Oh goodness. Full name? This would be fun. “Mom”, the redhead acknowledged her mother. “We have to talk.” Alex didn`t really want to. The redhead knew that she was in the right. Eliza sat down in front of her.   
“What is Maggie doing?”   
“Calling Lena. There`s a high chance that Aidan flew to see her.” 

Alex wasn`t sure of what to think of the name Aidan. It just wasn`t...Kara.   
“Do you know what you`ve done?” The redhead nodded. “Yes, I told Kara that she`s confused.” Elizas lips were pressed into a thin line.   
“You`re brother isn`t confused!” Alex laughed. “Clearly, my sister is very confused. The last month was really hard. She got injured and was bound to the bed. Nobody knew if she would ever be able to walk again. Somehow that planted this… idea inside her head. She will come to her senses. She just needs some time to think.” Eliza shook her head. “What if I told you that Aidan knew who he was before this rocky month?”

Alex raised an eyebrow. “I would say that you`re lying.” The blonde smiled sadly. “He told Cat and Nia before all of this happened.”   
Alex shook her head. “I don`t believe you!”   
“And why?”   
The younger woman avoided Elizas gaze. “Because she`s my little sister. She could never do something like that.” Her mother looked so disappointed. “Alex, you are lucky that Aidan is a very forgiving person. He probably thinks that it is his fault that you don`t believe him. You are still in denial but you will have to come to terms with it. Otherwise you are maybe giving up your chance to be his sister. You will lose, not just Kara, as you think. But you will lose Aidan. You know how easy it is to lose the people that are in important. You know how much it hurts. And you know Aidans story. Family is the most important thing to him. I`m begging you, think before you say anything that you could regret in a few months. “

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... I didn`t load up something yesterday. I wanted to but I felt sick and it just wasn`t a good idea.  
> I hope you enjoy the new chapter. Maggie will also talk to Alex very soon and Nia and Cat will meet Aidan.  
> Have a great day:)


	29. Phone Calls with Maggie

Aidan woke up in the middle of the night. He was wearing a hoodie which had been oversized just two days ago. Now it was just big enough to be comfortable worn. The kryptonian noticed that he had a stiff neck. The blond and Lena had fallen asleep on the couch last night. Lena had snuggled herself into his lap and it was like looking at a cat. But Aidan didn`t want the brunette to feel sore in the morning. Softly, he lifted the woman off his lap and carried her into their bedroom. 

Well, technically it was just Lenas bedroom. They hadn`t officially moved in together. The blond put his girlfriend onto the mattress but before he layed down again, he went out in the floor. Aidan pulled out his cellphone and searched for Maggies contact. It was late at night and the cop was probably asleep already but he wasn`t that patient. 

“Maggie?” The call got taken after the third ringing. “Who`s there?”, a tired voice sounded through the speakers. “It`s Aidan. I just wanted to know how it went with Alex.” The brunette sighed. Aidan was suddenly very aware of the fact just how late it was.   
“Eliza and I both tried to talk to her”   
“It sounds like there`s gonna be a `but`.” Aidan waited anxiously for an answer. “It didn`t exactly work. She still thinks that you`re…” Maggie didn`t need to finish that sentence. “She still thinks that I`m just confused.” The blond knew that Alex was stoic and didn`t like to change her mind but he had expected a bit better. 

“So no success at all?” “I`m sorry.” Aidan could hear the rustling of pillows being pushed aside. “But how exactly did it go with Lena? You didn`t tell me earlier.” The kryptonian smiled. “It went really well. Apart from the fact that at first she thought I was some crazy controlling new superhero that just bashed into her building” “Wait, what?” Aidan went into the kitchen, the phone still in his hand. “Yeah, there was another assassination.” The alien could hear gasping. “TODAY?”   
Aidan took a glass out of a shelf. “Yeah. Lex send some people. And guess what, while they were pointing guns, Lena and Jess were making bets.”   
Maggie sighed. “They need to get their priorities straight.” Aidan cackled. “I wouldn`t necessarily say straight” Maggie sighed again. “Not the time for Jokes, LD.”   
Aidan filled his glass with water. “Anyway, I believe that Jess already set up a therapy session for Lena.” 

"Oh dear lord, by all the magic forces of the universe, Thank You god! Finally!”   
Aidan raised an eyebrow. “You really hoped for her to go to therapy, didn`t you?” “Since the first time I met her. Don`t get me wrong, I love her very much, she`s a great friend and all but she has so, SO many issues!” The blond had to agree to that. “Don`t let her hear that.” “I maybe am stupid but I still love my life!” Aidan laughed. “And how did it go after that?” 

The alien took his time to first drink a sip of his water. “Well, I landed on her balcony, which possibly made her think that I was a stalker. After a while she noticed that it was me, she had some questions but she took it great.” “And then you made out?” “Why would you even think that?” Aidan could hear his friend laugh from the other side of the phone. “I met you.” “Okay, we did.” “Ha, I knew it!” Maggie sounded way to excited about that. “And? Did she already rip your clothes apart?” Aidan flinched. “What the fluff? No!” He could basically hear Maggie grinning. “Suddenly you can`t curse anymore? Wow. Anyway, she`ll do that soon.” 

The blond stroked a streak of his hair back.   
“No, she won`t.”   
“Oh yes, she will.” Aidan raised an eyebrow. “And why would she do that?”   
Maggie wanted to slam her face into a wall. “Because let`s face it, you are pretty hot.” Aidan blushed. “No, I am maybe handsome, but not `hot`.” The brunette laughed. “Boy, you had everyone kneeling to your knees when you were Kara. How do you think the people will react to the true you! You look like the love child of Chris Hemsworth and Grace Kelly. You can charm everyone!” 

If it would have been possible, Aidans head would have turned into a tomato. “Are you still in Midvale?” The blond could hear Maggie still chuckling. “Yeah, I got the guestroom. I am coming back to National City tomorrow. By the way, Eliza wanted me to help her plan your wedding.” The blond looked confused. “And why would she do that.” “Because if you wait any longer, she will propose to Lena for you.” Aidan grimaced. That was actually something he could imagine his mother doing. 

“Tell her to give me some more time, okay?” A light laugh came from the speaker. “Of course LD. Anyway, I`m gonna go back to sleep.” Aidan smiled. “Night Maggie. Love you.” The sound of pillows being pushed to the side was to be heard again. “Love you too Aidan.” Before he was able to hang up, Maggie was able to still yell “Use protection”, which made him blush again. He loved the brunette, she was like another older sister. Or a very annoying best friend. But he wouldn`t change the girl for any money in the world. 

The blond went back into the bedroom, where Lena had spread out above the whole bed. Aidan smiled at the view. He climbed into the twirl of blanket and as if it was second nature, the brunette turned around to cuddle up to him. That was something he could used to having every day.   
He would ask her, soon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You are probably tired of hearing it, but: I LOVE MAGGIE! SHE DESERVED A BETTER ENDING!


	30. Panic

Coming into the DEO had never felt this weird.   
The security guards had no idea who Aidan was, so Lena had to show her permission to have them both shown in. The fact that no one greeted the blond when he had secret handshakes with most of them was also incredibly irritating. 

Aidan had decided to dress in black dark blue suitpants, a white button up shirt and a blue vest. Of course, a dark red tie couldn`t be missing. When Lena first saw him wearing it he actually saw some of the rawness Maggie had told him about. The kryptonian noticed the dilated pupils and slightly off breath. He had to slightly smirk. The alien was still shy about it but it also felt good. The brunette was wearing a more practical outfit than usual. Instead of the skin tight dress, she was wearing jeans and a dark, red blouse. Her hair was tied back and she had thrown on lipstick which matched the color of the blouse.   
Needless to say that Aidan thought that Lena was the prettiest person on the planet. 

They got into the lift that would bring them to the headquarters where the rest of the superfamily had agreed to meet. Aidan was nervous. He knew that his friends were fine, that Cat and Nia would be so excited for him but seeing Alex again scared the shit out of him. When Lena had told him that it was time to go meet them, he had almost bailed and just stayed at home. While waiting for the elevator to arrive, Lena took his hand in hers. It was comforting but not enough to fully take the bad feeling away that had settled. 

Aidan felt like he was going to throw up. 

This wasn`t good.   
His skin turned pale. “Lena, James doesn`t know!”   
Lena smiled at him. “It will be fine.” “But what if he reacts badly?”   
The brunette traced her finger along the backside of his hand. “Then you will still have a lot of people that will support you.”   
She got quiet. Maybe a bit to quiet. Suspiciously Aidan looked at his girlfriend. “There`s something you haven`t told me.” She bit her lip and avoided the taller ones eyes. “There is a slight possibility that someone has told Clark that something is up.” 

“WHAT?” 

“But I`m not sure. Maggie held it pretty short on the phone this morning.” 

Aidan stared at the bland grey of the elevator. His eyes wide and his face still pale. “I`ll just get a new identity. Start a new life somewhere. Maybe get a dog.” He nodded. “That`s a great idea.” 

Lena noticed that Aidan seemed to be close to hyperventilating. “It will be alright. You won`t have to get a new identity. It`s gonna be fine!” The blond didn`t seemed like she had convinced him but there was no more time for ted talks. The lift door opened, and in front of them a small crowed waited. 

Aidan saw Maggie standing next to Nia. Eliza quietly talking to Cat while Clark was speaking with James and Louis was giving both of them smacks on the head. J`onn was talking to Alex, who was standing a away from their friends, shaking her head again and again. This was great, just fantastic. Aidan totally wasn`t having a panic attack or something. The kryptonians heart started to beat faster.   
Sweat dripping of his forehead. Suddenly, the people he had known for years turned to Lena and him. Some of them glad that they finally arrived, others angry and others in total confusion. Not recognizing Aidan. 

The world started to get blurry.   
The feeling of sheer panic filling the heroes heart. He couldn`t do this. He looked at Lena, as if a look was apology enough and then quickly ran to the window front.   
The glass shattered while he flew through it. The feeling of suffocation slowly lifting of his chest.   
He wanted to do it. But he couldn`t. He just wasn`t able to go through with it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so... I have this idea for a little side storyline but I`m not sure if it´s a good idea.   
> Eliza and Cat... what would you guys say if Eliza finally found someone new? And if this person would be... Cat Grant...  
> You know what, just tell me if it`s good. I can`t deal with critisism today.


	31. On thr roof

Lena was staring at the broken glass. The rest of the group also looked confused at the broken window. “Who was that?”, Clark asked. Lena sighed. She didn`t want to give away the blonds secret without his consent. “That was Aidan.” Clark still didn`t look like he knew anything more than before and was extremely perplexed on the fact that the guy also had superpowers.   
“Is he an alien?” 

Lena nodded and turned around to see Eliza looking at her worried. Lena wasn`t sure of what to do. How could she find Aidan? Where could he have gone? The alien was able to fly and had superspeed. He could be in Hawaii by now. This was just fantastic. The brunette glanced at her watch. It was 1 o`clock. 

Wait, the watch! A idea had just taken place. She waved over to Cat and Eliza. The two woman stepped closer and right away Cat said: “He was scared, wasn`t he.”   
Lena nodded. The two older woman shared a glance. “I have an idea how to find him but could you two keep the other ones occupied?” Elizas face lightened up. “Oh yes, I could share stories of Alex as a toddler.” “As much as I would like to hear them,” (and she actually would) “-Alex isn`t in the best state to make fun of right now and I don`t want her to tell Clark and James like this. It`s not fair to Aidan. he deserves to tell them himself.” 

Eliza seemed to understand. “So…. Am I allowed to tell the story of how I coupled up Supercorp?” Lena was confused. “What is supercorp?”   
But Eliza was faster than her. “YOU coupled them up? I was the one that excecuted the whole plan!” Lena wasn`t sure what the two were talking about but she didn`t want them to start a whole argument.   
“Firstly: What is Supercorp? Secondly: You two did meet before?” 

The two woman nodded in unison. “Of course, multiple times. And Supercorp is your shippingname.” “My what?” Cat raised her hand to massage her nose bridge. “You need an update on pop culture. It`s basecelly the name of an OTP.” She looked at Eliza who was suspicious of the name that Cat had just used.   
“She should know what it is. I heard her and Aidan argue about their OTP`s ones.” 

Lena smiled nervously. “To be honest, I just pretended to know what it was to impress him.” Cat looked like somebody had just punched her in the face. “She is hopeless.”   
Eliza smiled. “Supercorp is you and Aidan and Cat and I brought you together.” “With the help of some people.”, Cat threw in. Eliza nodded. “Some people means complete L-Corp AND Catco but that would be nitpicking.” Lena looked at the two blondes that were clearly passionate about this. “Okay, tell them this story and I`ll go and get Aidan.”

The brunette was standing on the roof of the DEO. The wind was blowing more violently today and it messed up Lenas ponytail.  
“Oh thanks for that one.”, she whispered. Lena pressed the button on her watch. She remembered the day that Ka-Aidan, had given it to her. The loving look on Aidans face but at the same time this scared look that Lena would never forgive him. She could only hope that it would work. The watch send out a signal that only kryptonians could hear. Everyone in the inner circle had one. Supers were particularly protective over their families. 

The swoosh of someone flying through the air grabbed Lenas attention. The tall man landed in front of her. His back straightened and his hair messed up by the wind. The brunette swallowed. This was unfair. “Lena.” Aidans voice sounded cold and he was avoiding her eyes. “Aidan, what happened in there?”   
“I just didn`t feel ready.” His voice still was emotionless.   
“You can tell me love.” 

Aidan was nervously fiddling with a button of his vest. His tie was laying loosely around his neck. “I wasn`t ready and I was scared.” He finally looked at her. “You had a panic attack?” He nodded. Lena got closer. “Do you need a hug?” “Yes” When Lenas arms were around him, Aidan finally let loose. “I don`t know if I can do this.”, he said. Lena was drawing calming circles on his back. “You can! You already told multiple people. You can do this again.” She spoke quietly. “Everybody in this room loves you. Everyone there cares about you and that won`t change!” Aidan tried to calm himself but Lena still noticed the shaking of his hands. 

“But what if they react like Alex?” He was barely whispering. If Lena wouldn`t have stood next to him, she wouldn`t have been able to hear the blond speak.   
“Alex still loves you. She just needs a bit more time to get used to you being her little brother.” 

Aidan sighed. “I hate this `more time` argument. It`s not an excuse. Eliza adopted me and she was able to accept me right away. Nia could, Maggie was able to do it. Cat noticed before me and you also reacted great. So why does Alex get to play the `more time` card.   
Why does everyone believe that she`s just going to change her mind? What if she doesn`t? There`s a valid chance of that happening. It`s not fair that everyone thinks she is doing this because she`s my older sister or something. She is being a big asshole and it`s not fair. I know that she wants to protect me but she won`t realize that I can protect myself. I am not a little kid anymore. I am a super damn it.” 

He had talked himself into an rage and Lena knew that Aidan needed this. 

“I mean, when I first came to earth, I needed help. Yes. But I learned how to take care of myself. I have been doing that for years. Even if Alex still thinks that she needs to follow me every step on the way. When I cut my hair she thought that someone was mind controlling me. Mind controlling Lena!” He paused. “She doesn`t think that I`m able to make decisions for myself and that everything I do without her approval is a mistake and I`m so sick of it. I love Alex but she has to stand back. If she accepts me being Aidan, she can be my sister again. But as long as she won`t accept me for me. As long as she is treating me as if I´m a little kid, she isn`t my sister.” 

Lena placed her hand on his shoulders. “Tell her that. Maybe it will help her realize that what she`s doing is wrong.” He nodded, his breathing uneven.   
“Are you ready to go in and tell this room full of people who you are?”   
Aidan laughed , his voice hoarse. “Give me one more minute to calm down.”


	32. Telling friends and family

Aidan landed with Lena in his arms on the floor. Feeling guilty he looked at the broken glass laying next him. “Don`t worry”, Lena whispered. “We`ll replace it.” The blond let his girlfriend down and was welcomed by his friends looking at the two. 

“Everything alright?”, Eliza asked, looking concerned. Her son nodded and smiled. “Yeah, it`s fine Mom.” He could hear the three people in this room that didn`t know gasp. “Mom? Who the hell are you?”, Clark asked. “I`m Aidan Jeremiah Danvers.” He could see Eliza smile at the second name. He hadn`t spoken about wanting a middle name but he thought that it would be a good way to say thank you. 

“I think I would know if Eliza had another child.”, Superman argued. Aidan grinned. “nah, you`re right. She only has two kids. “Well…” he stared at Maggie, Nia and Lena. “Technically she adopted more.”   
Clark raised an eyebrow.   
Aidan stepped forward. “I used to be Kara.”   
The dark haired man`s eyes widened. “What?” The blond nodded and smiled. “Yeah, it`s a long story.” “But when did this happen?” “It was a serum Alex and Lena made to give me my powers back but it also had the effect of this.” Clark seemed critical. “But why would you change your name for that? They could simply make an anti-serum.” 

“That`s what I said too.”, Alex commented. Aidan shot her a glance of anger. He didn`t want to hear her speak right now. 

“I don`t need an anti-serum because I don`t want it.” His cousin still didn`t seem to completely understand. “I am trans, Clark.” Aidan had said those words multiple times now and still it was scary. “oh” The older kryptonian fell quiet. He seemed to be lost in thought. “Kal? Any thoughts on that?” He startled. “Ähm? I`m happy for you?” 

Aidan sighed. It didn`t seem sincere. But what had he expected? Clark didn`t know him well enough to really have a strong reaction to it. If Aidan was being honest with himself, he and his cousin were nothing more than acquaintances. While the blond tried to keep in touch the older one didn`t. He always was too busy. Aidan knew Luis better than her husband. So it was no surprise when the brunette came forward to hug him. 

“I`m happy for you, Aidan.” And it sounded sincere. When the two separated, the older reporter took her time to tell him that Clark didn`t mean to be awkeward. “I know.”, the younger one just sighed. He had given up on his cousin. For years the other kryptonian had been his idol but now he was realizing that the guy wasn`t worth it. James was standing at Luis side, looking startled too. Aidan looked at the other man, nervously scratching a patch behind his ears. 

“So, what do you think about this?” The tall photographer seemed to think. “Well, a bit weird since we dated but also I am glad that you figured it out. It must have been difficult and as long as you are happy, that`s all that counts.” Aidan smiled. Yeah, that sounded like something James would say. The taller man opened his arms. “Common, give me the Danvers hug I know you desperately want to give!” The alien laughed and put his arms around the photographer. “I know that you can go without breathing for like twenty minutes but I should remind you that I`m not capable to do that.” 

Aidan let him go, smiling widely and then saw Nia looking at him with a broad grin. “And?”, he asked. The younger woman gave him two thumbs up and then ordered him to spin around. He did it and the younger brunette laughed. “Aidan, you look fabulous.” The blond smiled. He hugged her and Maggie in the backround asked: “Can you feel his muscles?”   
The reporter chuckled. “Yeah, it`s like a pile of rocks.” The cops laugh was to be heard. “Lena, I have no idea how you can comfortably cuddle with him. “ Aidan looked up to see his girlfriend smile. “No, he`s extremely comfortable.” Maggie grinned. “oh I bet he is.” 

The couple turned red. 

“You two also have no excuse not to have children now.” Maggie seemed to be really proud of that argument.   
“Well, we aren`t married and we are still very young.”, Lena tried to be reasonable. Maggie rolled her eyes. “Stop with that and finally have children. I want nieces and nephews that I can teach curse words to make you two mad.” 

Aidan sighed. “You know that we won`t have children just to please you?” The cop grinned. “Nah, you`re doing it to get Eliza and Cat off your back.” The blond looked at the two older woman that were both giving him stern looks. He looked at them as if to apologize. “She`s got a point there.”   
Cat opened her mouth. “outrageous.” Eliza agreed with her. “The youth really has no respect anymore.” The CEO nodded. “There you go and guide them for years-“ “-And they go and say stuff like that…” Cat shook her head. “So much to having respect.” 

Aidan grinned. “Dramaqueens.” 

He had only whispered but still the response: “AIDAN JEREMIAH DANVERS!”, came from both woman.   
He flinched and hid behind Maggie. “Protect me.” The cop laughed and stepped away. “No was LD, I won`t step in front of those two.”, she gestured at the blondes. As much as Aidan hated to say it, he wouldn`t do that eather. “Sounds fair.” He stood upright. “It was nice knowing all of you.” But before the older woman could say anything, another voice interrupted them. 

“Am I just supposed to be fine with this?” Aidan turned around and saw Alex. The redhead looked tired. “Please don`t do this.”, Aidan whispered, hoping that his sister would come to her senses but she didn`t seem to care about his begging. “You had a difficult month. Sleep a night and don`t just go running around telling people this.” The alien sighed. “And why wouldn`t I if this is who I am?” The agent looked him in the eyes.   
“Because this isn`t you.”   
“And how do you know?”   
“Because I know who you are. You are Kara Danvers.” 

Aidan shook his head. “You know what Alex? I`ve heard enough.” His lips were drawn together in a thin line. “You have no idea who I am. You have no idea how it is to be me. You are my older sister and I get that you are trying to protect me but for gods sake, I saw my planet explode. I am a fucking superhero. I am a grown man with a job. I`ve made new friends, who have no problem to accept me for who I am and if you can`t live with that, than I don`t want you here.” 

He gritted his teeth. “You are my sister and I would like us to be the Danvers sibling, but for that you have to stop! You have to stop thinking that you know exactly what I`m thinking and that I`m just this stupid little kid. You have to accept me being Aidan. And that`s not a lot to ask.” The blond stared at the redhead. “It`s the bare minimum to ask. And if you can`t too that than you have no right to call yourself my sister.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay, everyone knows but still fuck you Alex:)  
> And why did the sad song playlist on youtube suddenly play country music? It`s still the same playlist and that guy is singing about cows. Wtf


	33. A talk beneath the stars

The two siblings were staring at each other. The tension between them electrical. The redhead gritted her teeth and turned around. “I`m sorry.”, she said and stormed out. Aidan was left looking at her. His expression carved in stone. The blonds right hand forming a fist. Aidan didn`t want to cry. Not now. He had just managed to come out to his friends, that was a big, joyes occation. And he wouldn`t let Alex take that away. He only hoped that the redhead would eventually come around ad would lose this stoic attitude. 

A hand landed on his shoulders and he turned to look. It was Maggie. “Are you alright?” Aidan nodded. He wasn`t truly okay but he had been worse so the blond couldn`t truly say that it was horrible. And not horribly meant fantastic for the alien (multiple people had questioned his definition of fantastic over the years).   
“What are you going to do with her? You two live together.” The cop looked thoughtful. “Well, she`s gonna sleep on the couch and if she doesn`t change her mind I`ll tell her to find another place to stay.” Aidan bit his lip. “You don`t have to do that. I don`t want to ruin your marriage just because of this.” 

Maggie smiled sadly up at him. “I love her a lot. But if she can`t accept who her brother, whom I also love very much, truly is, than we aren`t a match.” He shook his head. He didn`t want them to have those problems. “It will be fine LD.” Aidan nodded and then proceeded to go and meet Cat, who was still talking to Eliza. “-why I think that nobody should use it ever.” He hadn`t cached on to what they had been talking about but he could hear Eliza laughing. 

“Cat?” The blonde turned around. When she noticed that it was him she started smiling. “No common, let me look at you. Since you`ve gotten here I still haven`t had a chance.” He laughed nervously. “You`ve got some good genes.” Aidan smiled and opened his mouth. “I want to talk to you about something.” It had probably sounded too serious. Both Cat and Eliza looked at him in an alerted way.   
“It`s nothing bad!”, he tried to calm them. “We just need to figure out how we are going to introduce Aidan to Catco.” 

The older woman looked at each other, both trying to find ideas. “I don`t want to just kill of Kara. That would be wrong. I want to go there as a transgender man. I am proud of what I did as Kara and I don`t want to lose that. But if that happens after only a month of being absent? That would be very suspicious.” Cat nodded. “I agree. It would probably be the best if you would take some time off. Just so much that it seems realistic enough for these changes to happen.” The blond nodded. “Yeah, but I can`t be spotted by any paparazzi in this time and I don`t want to be useless.” 

Lena suddenly appeared. “You once told me that different earths exist” He nodded. “What if we go to one of them? You have friends there. We could still work and I could finally do something on the science of the multiverse.” Aidan grinned. His girlfriend looked like a child with a candy cane. “I have an idea that you would like maybe even a bit better.”   
The brunette raised an eyebrow. “And what would that be?”   
“You will see. I have to figure out the details first but you will love it.” 

The blond superhero stepped on the roof again. The day had turned into the night and the sky was shining with stars tonight. “You came here too?”, he heard a familiar voice.   
“You know that I love the stars Alex.” The redhead was staring at the moon. Aidan stepped up to stand next to her. The older woman twitched. He sighed. “Do you remember how we went flying when we were teenagers?” The redhead nodded slightly. “You were so scared to fly. You were afraid of falling to the ground.” He paused. “Do you remember what I told you back then?” 

There was a silence between them before we Alex finally answered. “You told me that you would always be there to catch me.” 

He nodded. “And I meant that. And I tried to keep my promise. When your plane almost crashed, I was there. Even though I wasn`t always as smooth as I would like it, I was always there.”   
Alex now was the one to nod. “Do you remember what you told me when I was scared of the popcorn machine? When I was so afraid of it?” The redhead bit her lip. “I told you that I would always be there to protect you. That I would always help you if you got scared.” Aidan looked at her. “I haven`t needed that help in a long time. But I do now.” The alien scratched his neck. “I am terrified. I won`t know what will come next. I don`t know how other people will react to this. There are people that will spit at me for being who I am.” 

Aidan looked at the spot in the sky where Krypton was still burning. “I hoped that you would understand. That you would be there to help. That you would keep your promise to help me when I`m scared. I don`t need to be protected anymore. I am strong but I am still scared. And it hurts so much that a part of this fear is because of you.   
You never made me feel this way before. Like I`m not valid. Like I´m not my own person. And it scares the shit out of me. Because if my own sister doesn`t think that I know who I am, than who else will think that? This world is a crucial place. It`s unfair. You are a part of the community. You know how it feels. You were so scared when you came out. Don`t you understand that I feel this fear now? I want to take this and be thankful for the body I have now.   
Because most trans people don`t get it this easily. I`m lucky. But I want you on my side when I tell the world. Because you always made me feel like I could do anything. Please, try to understand.” 

They fell silent again. Aidan anxiously waiting. “I can`t say that I understand.”, Alex finally broke the silence. “For me you were always Kara. You were always my little sister and it`s hard to see you like this.” Her eyebrows were drawn together. “But I can see that I might have made a mistake by hiding you away. By trying to protect you too much. That you felt like you couldn`t tell me something like this. Or that you were too afraid to think about it. I just want what`s best for you. And me thinking about it got in the way of what you actually want. I was so sure that I knew you better than you knew yourself.” 

Aidan stared at the redhead. Hoping that she would accept it. 

“I won`t see you as this man by tomorrow. It will take time. But I can promise you that I will try.”   
Aidan nodded. It wasn`t the best answer. And Alex still hadn`t called him by his name.   
But they would get there.   
They would work it out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alex isn`t totally fine with it yet, but it will be alright. I promise. We can stop saying fuck you to her.  
> Who has a theory on what Aidans idea is? Because I have that already planned but I want to know what you all think he`ll do.  
> I also am at home because I`m still sick. (since last wednesday and I told my parents yesterday. They were mad that I didn`t tell them. But now I don`t have to go to school and that`s something)


	34. How to shave, a crash course by Lena Luthor

When the kryptonian got home, Lena was already working in the kitchen. He could hear the clattering of pans and the dropping of an egg, which was immidieatly followed by cursing. Aidan grinned. Lena and kitchens. That`s was why the more or less lived on takeout. “Honey, tell me that the kitchen is still standing!”   
“It is and now shut up!”, was the answer. 

He chuckled. Lena could have kind of a temper when someone started criticizing her cooking skills. But the brunette knew that they weren`t as good. At least Aidan hoped so. The blond took out his phone and sat down on the couch, he saw multiple new messages from his friends. A text that was filled with emojies from Nia, Maggie had send the short sentences: “Don`t use protection!!!” and right after that “But stay save!!! (See? I`m a great friend)”   
He didn`t bother to answer that one. Eliza had sent a text too “Are my grandchildren already in work?” 

Aidan grimaced. That was nothing he ever wanted his mother to ask. “Please!!!! For the love of Rao, DON`T ASK ME THAT!!!!” He sighed. If the couple would ever want their friends to stop asking them when they were going to have children, they would have to have a baby. And that would only make the teasing worse. There was really nothing that could ever stop their family from being a massive pain in the ass, but somehow, that was something that made their family their family. All the teasing showed that they cared. 

Aidan wanted kids. Even though there had been a long period of time when he thought that he would never have them. But with Lena? It was something that he actually could imagine. In his perfect future they would wake up in house, some years away from now. The sun would shine through the window and tickle his nose. His arms would be wrapped around Lena and he would give her a gentle kiss on the cheek before getting up to make breakfast. 

Their house would be mostly made of wood. And it wouldn`t be in the middle of the city and instead maybe in a suburban area or maybe even in Midvale. While Aidan would be cooking pancakes, quick footsteps would grab his attention and the alien would see a dog running at him, joyfully greeting his owner.   
After patting the fuzzy friend, Aidan would go back to cooking and setting up the table. He would put on some music and dance through the room (It would be showtunes from musicals, Lena hated them but she would always play them for her now husband). And then Lena would come walking down the stairs, still a bit sleepy and kids following in her steps. Aidan didn`t know how many wanted. 

One? No, he had grown up with a sister. A sibling was a good thing. Maybe two. Two kids would be great. They would always have someone to play and fight with. Someone they could trust. The family would sit down on the table. While the kids would be eating, Aidan and Lena would be teasing each other and make subtle jokes that their children were still too young to understand and everything would be wonderful. They would visit Eliza, Alex and Maggie with their dog (Aidan knew that Maggie really wanted to get one). Nia, who had risen to be a star reporter and was in a relationship with Brainy, who could be a bit exhausting but they would make it work. James, who was eather single or had figured his stuff out enough to go back to Lucy and of course also Cat. 

They would work more from home, Aidan still being a superhero would work only half time at Catco to make time for the family and Lena would finally get her well deserved nobel prize. 

Aidan got shaken out of his daydreams when Lena asked him to set the table. The Luthor had made something simple. While they were eating, Aidan cached his girlfriend staring at him. “Do I have something on my face?” he waited for an answer. Instead Lena raised her hand to drive her fingers along his jawline. “You`re getting a stubble.” “Should I shave it?”, the blond asked selfconciosly. “No-No, I like it.” Lena smiled at him. 

“Do you even know how to shave your face?” Aidan stared at his dinner plate. “No.” He looked up to see Lena smiling. “How about I teach you and after that one time shaving you can grow it out?” He nodded. “That would be nice, but why do you know how to shave?” “As a Luthor kid I had to learn it. It was in one of the deputant thingys in college.” Aidan nodded. “Well, let`s it up so you can show me.” 

Aidan was sitting on a chair in the kitchen, Lena set a mirror down in front of him. She was holding something that somewhat looked like a paper knife. The alien looked at it like it could jump at him at any moment. “This”, Lena said and held up the knife. “-Is a razor.” Aidans eyebrows were drawn together. “That one doesn`t look like the ones that they show in the commercials.”   
Lena sighed. “Poor boy.” She stepped closer to him. “It`s a more traditional razor. Every respectable gentleman should learn how to shave with these.” The alien chuckled. “You`re such a deputant.”   
“I know, our teacher always said that and somehow it stuck with me.” 

She gestured at Aidan to sit up straight and grabbed a tube. Lena opened the tube and a white cream came out of it. She raised her hands to Aidans face and spread it on the blonds jaw and upper lip. The alien looked in the mirror and his eyes widened. “I look like santa claus!”, he said with joy. Lena smiled at the reporter and gestured him to sit still again. She grabbed the razor and slowly drew it along Aidans skin. “You have to be careful not to cut yourself! If it stops running smoothly you have to sharpen it, understood?” 

Aidan didn`t correct Lena on the fact that he wouldn`t be able to cut himself. Being an alien and all. The Luthor had the razor on his face. Moving probably wasn`t the best idea. She finished his left side and then gave the knife to Aidan. “Here, now you try.” With shaking fingers the super raised the razor to his face and started drawing it along his skin, just how Lena had done first. When he was finished Lena gave him another tube of cream to spread on his face. 

“That`s against skin irritations.” The alien took it. “Thank you Lena.” The brunette smiled at him and leaned down to place a kiss on his lips. While the kiss was supposed to be only a peck, the couple soon was openly making out. Lena sitting on Aidans lap. The blond let his fingers trace along the lines of Lenas shirt and than let them slip under to expose the cold skin.   
He could hear Lena moaning at the touch. Before the blond did anything else he stopped in his movements and with a rusty voice asked Lena: “Bedroom?”   
The younger woman nodded and while catching her breath somehow managed to say “Yes, please.”   
Aidan picked the girl up and carried her to their bedroom. Instead of going to sleep, they stayed up a while longer…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I`m gonna say it right now, I`m never going to write smut. I`m sorry but no.  
> (Also I always skip those parts because I am very wholesome... okay not wholesome but I once read something and it was horrible and I don`t need that again!)  
> Have a great day:)


	35. Brunch with the family

Aidan woke up. The familiar feeling of Lena weighing on his body. His eyes were drawn in by the clock on the nightstand.  
It was nice o`clock on a Saturday (I really wanted to write the song lyrics… “The regular crowd shuffles in, there`s an old men, sitting next to me, making love to his tonic and gin”…. anyway, got a little distracted. Let`s continue) and the clock was ringing. 

Nothing that Aidans sensible ears would ever learn to appreciate. A muffled growl came from the woman lying on his chest. “Make it stop!” The blond grinned and stopped the alarm. “Hey Lee? Why was the alarm set?” Lena still didn`t bother to open her eyes. “I don`t know. I maybe made brunch arrangements yesterday.” Aidan raised his right hand to massage the pinch of his nose.  
“With whom?”  
“Alex, Maggie and some other people.” The alien sighed. “Who are other people?”  
The woman didn`t react. “Honey? Who are other people?” “Who`s in the superfriends squat again?”  
The kryptonian let his arm fall down. “And where?”  
“Here”  
“WHAT?” 

Aidan now was completely awake. “And when do our friends arrive?” The brunette didn`t seem to bet an eye. “At 10” Well now Aidan really was awake. He had one hour to make brunch for ten people. Himself and Lena included. And he didn`t know if Clark and Lois would come.  
So it would maybe be twelve people including two kryptonian which meant twenty people. “We only have one hour to prepare food for a whole army!”, Aidan said while jumping off the bed and searching for jeans. He sighed. Most of the pairs were too skinny. He would have to go shopping. Luckily he stole some of Jeremias old stuff. While trying to fit his head through a whole in a shirt he stared at Lena. “Why aren`t you panicking?”  
A voice, silenced by fluffy pillows answered. “I`m too tired to even process this so give me some time to wake up!” 

Aidan nodded and hastily ran into the kitchen where the barber chair from yesterday was still standing. The alien put it away and cleaned the kitchen with superhuman speed. Sometimes the alien was thankful for the powers. They really were great to help in panicking situations. When multiple pans were already on the oven, cocking bacon, eggs and pancakes, Lena finally walked in. She was wearing black yoga pants and had stolen one of his old flannels. Aidan noticed that the brunette was walking a little stiff and hoped that Maggie would just shut up this one time. 

“Do you need any help?”, Lena asked. Aidan gave her a wide smile. “If you could set the table please?” The woman nodded and went to a white cupboard in which they were storing the plates. “How many do we need?” Aidans eyebrows were drawn together. “Ten? Set two aside. Just in case Lois and Clark come.” Lena nodded and started to prepare the table. 

When the clock said 9:57, the doorbell rang and Lena was already sitting on the table. Watching Aidan cook. When Lena tried to stand up he just motioned her to sit and went to get the people waiting outside. “Hey Mom, hey Cat.”, he greeted his mother and his mentor. The two blondes were smiling and to his surprise, even Cat gave him a hug. “Morning Sweetie.”, Eliza said while walking past him and getting to the kitchen where she greeted Lena. “It smells like something is burning.”, Cat noticed. 

Aidans face went pale. “Oh shizzle”, he cursed and ran back to the kitchen, just to see Eliza standing before the stove, saving what once had been bacon. “Why didn`t you do anything when it started to burn?”, the alien asked his girlfriend, who was still sitting at the table.  
“Remember that I`m only allowed to use the kitchen twice a month because I apperantly caused to much damage?” She stared him dead in the eyes. “That`s what`s up. If you and Maggie hadn`t set that rule the bacon would still be fine.” 

A laugh was heard, coming from behind Aidan and he saw both Alex and Maggie entering the door. “It wasn`t just us who decided on that. We had a whole meeting on that subject and we decided in unison. Aidan and I just were doomed to tell you.”, Maggie said. Lena looked critically at the cop. The brunette just shrugged her shoulders. “We picked the two shortest straws.” Not soon after, James and J`onn arrived. After letting them in Aidan leaned down to Lena to silently whisper: “Next time just invite them to Noonans. Okay?” The brunette nodded and smiled. 

When Nia and Brainy came stumbled in, everyone else was already sitting at the table. Eliza had managed to save the food and was now putting it on plates. “How long have you been waiting?”, Nia asked while removing her coat. “Well, J`onns teeth are starting to rod and I think I heard Aidan complain about back issues. So it`s been a while.” The reporter rolled her eyes and sat down. Brainy next to her did the same and stared critically at his friends. 

“From what I saw, J`onns teeth are in a phenomenal state and Aidans posture has never been better.” Nia gave the others a smile while lightly patting Brainys elbow. “Sarcasm babe.” “Oh”, the level twelve intellect stared at the others in aww. “I still have to learn twenty-first century costumes such as… sarcasm.” Eliza smiled at him. “It`s perfectly fine that you don`t know how to do that. It makes you very polite in difference to other people.” 

Maggie raised one eyebrow and looked at Lena. “Does she mean me?” The Luthor nodded. Maggie turned around to her wife and complained: “Danvers, your mom say I`m not polite.” Alex laughed. “I mean, is she wrong?” The cop stared at the redhead with wide eyes. She then turned around to look at Aidan. “Little Danvers? You`re one my side, right?” The blond scratched his neck. “Well, remember the time you got me drunk and we drove to McDonalds at three in the morning just to steal the Ronald McDonald stature?”  
“Your point?” The alien laughed. “Some people would maybe call you a bad influence.” Maggie stayed silent for a few seconds. Then she crossed her arms and started pouting. 

“Is brunch like this every time?”, Cat asked Eliza who was trying to eat a pancake. The blonde stopped her movements and nodded. “Why do you think I come to these only some times a year? I love them dearly but if I would have them around 24/7 I would be dead by now.” Cat chuckled and quickly stole a peace of bacon from Elizas plate.  
“That`s my food!”, the other one complained. The CEO just grinned and pointed at the younger ones, who were now trying to assure Maggie of the fact that they all loved her while J`onn was sitting on the table, looking like he had lost all will to live. 

“How does J`onn deal with them every day?”, Cat wanted to know. Eliza smiled. “I don`t know but he deserves a medal. That guy has to deal with so much drama.” "I should for pay his therapy.”, the CEO stated. The other woman looked at her. “Why do you think that he needs therapy?” “His whole race died, he`s the chef of an international agency and he has to deal with those kids.” 

Eliza had nothing to argue. “Fair point. In fact probably everyone in this room should go to therapy. They all have some issues.” Cat agreed. “No kidding. Have you ever heard Nia talking to someone? She said that she wants to `yeet herself of a cliff` and while I`m not entirely sure what that means I`m convinced that it`s bad.”

Aidan saw his mother talking quietly with Cat. Eliza was laughing and her eyes were shining. He was glad that the two were getting along so well. Eliza could need some good friends in her live. “I`m gonna go to the bathroom.”, Lena announced and got up. Aidan hoped that no one else heard the quiet wincing sound.  
When the brunette had left, Maggie leaned over.  
“So… why was Lena walking a bit sideways?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So.. while I was walking home from the doctor yesterday, I had to walk over the marke and while I had earphones in, I still almost had a panick attack because there were other people (more than usual)  
> So... how do I get a therapist without my parents telling me that it`s a bad idea and they know people who "destroyed" their familys that way?  
> Because I could really use some therapy.  
> Anyway, have a great day:)


	36. Sam and Ruby

Lena was sitting in her office. This was her last week of work. She and Aidan had decided that they would give themselves a week to prepare everything for their trip. The brunette still didn`t know where they were going. Aidan refused to tell her. So it was natural that she was a little nervous. But in the time left she wanted to manage to do as much as possible at L-Corp and also chose the person that would lead the company while she was gone. 

Lena had already given Jess another raise and told her that she would have to follow a new boss for a year. The secretary wasn`t happy about it. Lena knew that the woman worried about her. 

The phone started ringing. She picked up. “Lena Luthor”, she said. At the opposite line a familiar voice answered. “Hey Lena. I heard that you wanted to talk?” The CEO smiled. She had to call Sam more often. “Yes, first of all: How are you?” The was a little pause in which Lena could hear the other woman signing a paper. “A lot better than when I was Reign. I needed this time to figure things out.” Lena nodded. “How is Ruby?” “She`s good. She`s getting straight a`s in school, has a lot of friends. But she misses you.” Lena sighed. “She keeps asking about aunt Lena and how Alex and Kara are.”   
“Well, I am doing fine. Kara is a bit more of a complicated story. But Alex is doing better. She and Maggie figured things out and got married.” The brunette could hear her friend breath. “I`m glad that Alex is happy. She helped me a lot back then.” 

Lena was aware. And she was also aware of the fact that Sam and Alex had gotten close back then. And that if Sam hadn`t gone away, there would have been a big chance of them dating. But she also knew that the young mother just wanted her friend to be happy. “How did they figure it out? Does Maggie want kids now?”, Sam asked. “Well, Alex still wants to be a mother but she and Maggie are taking it slow now. Maggie figured out that a big part of why she didn`t want kids was the fact that she was kicked out by her father and she doesn`t want to make the same mistakes. But also that with her and Alex jobs she`s scared that if something happens the kid will be left alone. Maggie is currently trying to get Alex to get a dog. And they want to adopt one day. But not a little kid. Maggie wants to adopt a teenager because she was kicked in that time of her life and older kids have a lot less chances to get adopted. And Alex agrees with her. She has her own expiriences with adoption.”   
“Due to Kara?” 

Lena flinched. “Yeah. So anyway, that`s not why I called.” The CEO could hear the eyebrow raise through the phone. “What is the reason?” “Well, I am going away for a year and-“ Sam had interrupted her. “What? Why?” “I told you, it`s complicated.” The CO sighed. “So it has something to do with Kara?” “Yeah. But I need someone to lead the headquarters of L-Corp.” There was silence. “You want me to come back to National City?” 

Lena nodded. “It would be good to have you here. You`re still me CO and you know the company.” Sam sighed. “Just so you know, if I do this I want Jess as my secretary!” “Of course.” The kryptonian sounded satisfied with herself. “Then I`ll do it. When should I be in National City?” “Maybe in two days? I`m leaving in five. That way I could give you the projects that L-Corp is currently working on.” Lena waited for the answer. “I`ll see you in two days than. And you better tell me why you`re leaving!”   
The CEO laughed. “Of course. Bye”   
“Bye”

Two day later Lena heard the sound of the doorbell. She looked at Aidan who was scribbling in his notebook and had no intentions to stand up. When she opened the door, she was greeted by a brown haired storm that started hugging her.   
“AUNT LENA!” Lena laughed and hugged the thirteen year old. “Hey Ruby.” The girl started bubbling about how excited she was. Lena looked up to see Sam smiling. The woman was wearing a grey coat and scarf. Her hair was open and falling onto her shoulders. She looked like a supermodel. 

“Sam.”, Lena said and stepped forward to hug her friend. The CO returned the hug and than took a step back to take a better look at Lena. “You look fine.” Her eyebrows were drawn together. Lena could tell that Sam was still trying to figure out why she was leaving. “Do you two want to come in?” Mother and daughter both nodded. When they came into the apartment Sam gave Lena an adoring look. “Have you turned into an Interior designer or something?” “No, but a friend. He name is Nia was furious to help.” 

Ruby had already walked into the living room and was now staring at Aidan who had set the pen aside. “Who are you?”, the girl asked, wrinkling her nose.   
The blond smiled at her. “I`m Aidan.” While Lena was proud of her boyfriend for introducing himself by his name, it wouldn`t help with explaining the whole thing to Sam and her daughter.   
Said persons eyebrows were drawn together, looking suspiciously at the man. 

“Who is that Lena?” The brunette sighed. “That`s my boyfriend.” “WHAT? I thought you and Kara were happy?” The other woman looked confused.   
Aidan had heard the said thing and he stood up. “Hi Sam.”, he greeted her. Instead of greeting him back, Sam asked very blundly: “Who the fuck are you?”   
The alien smiled at the smaller woman. “Well, my full name would be Aidan Jeremiah Danvers.” Sam now looked even more confused. “Another Danvers?” 

Lena was staring at Aidan. “Do you have fun with not just telling them directly?” The alien nodded and grinned. “A little bit.” The brunette sighed and gave her boyfriend a gibbs slap. Sheepishly he went to the kitchen. “Would you tell her while I get you two some wine?”, he asked.   
“Sometimes I hate him.” Lena looked up to see Sam staring at her. Lena could see the question marks above her head. “This guy, that I`m dating for some reason, used to be Kara.”   
"WHAT?” The CEO had noticed that Sam had grown very fond of that word.   
“I told you that it`s a bit complicated.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OVER 40.000 WORDS!!!! Now this officially counts as a novel. I`m actually proud of myself.   
> So, how do you think would Sam react if she meet Sanvers? And why did I once read that Sam/Alex/Maggie story whichs name I forgot? But it was really well written and I kinda want to do this pairing. But I`m unsure and I would only do that one if the readers are okay with that because I really don`t know if I should do that one....  
> What do you guys think?


	37. Dimples

Sam was sitting down on the sofa. Her facial expression still confused and maybe a bit shocked. “You`re telling me that this hunk used to be your very girly girlfriend?” Lena laughed. “Don`t let him hear the word girly. And yeah.”   
The CO stared at the wall. “Damn, a lot happened while I was gone, didn`t it?” The Luthor smiled and patted her friend on the shoulder. “Yeah, you could say that. But this is actually one of the more recent occurrences.” “Wait, is this the reason that you`re going?” Lena nodded. “Yeah, this wasn`t exactly planned.” 

Sam gave her a questioning look. “It was a kryptonite incident that kinda changed his cells but he identified as male even before so it was really practical but the press would start to ask questions if they would see that Aidan transitioned in the matter of a month.” The other woman rested her head on her knee. “What happened in this month anyway? I noticed that there were no paparazzi pictures of you and your… boyfriend?” 

Lena noticed the little gab between the words and she understood. “After a fight with an alien Aidan almost died. He was in a coma and everything and then he wasn`t able to walk so Alex and I started working on a cure and this cure turned him into this beefcake.” Slowly Sam started to understand. “Did you already know that he was Aidan at this point, or...” “Some of our friends already knew. Cat Grant actually knew before him.” Sam chuckled. “Makes sense. This woman knows everything.” “Also Nia, she`s also trans and she took Aidan to get a haircut. That was actually like two months ago already. Maggie found out by herself.” 

Sam raised an eyebrow. “And when he transitioned Eliza was actually the first to see. She reacted really positive. Aidan and she terrorized her neighbor on the next day though. Alex was the next one to find out.” Her friend saw the brunette flinched. “I guess that one didn`t go so well?”, Sam asked. 

“Yeah, Alex had a pretty bad reaction. Told Aidan that he was just confused.” At the look on Sams she added. “It`s better now. Alex still has her problems to call him by his name but it`s getting better.” Sam let out a breath she didn`t know she was holding. “I was the next to find out. Lex had send some assasins to kill me and Aidan saved me but I was kinda harsh because I didn`t realize that it was him. But we made up later. Some days ago her told Clark, Lois and James and we hosted brunch the next day. So that`s alright.” 

Sams forehead was showing wrinkles. Aidan came back from the kitchen. Ruby following him. The girl seemed to have ran after him. While the blond was carrying two wine glasses, Ruby had two glasses filled with coke. The alien handed the two woman each a glass and then sat down. Ruby sat down to his feet. Handing him his coke. 

“So, what do you think Sam?”, Aidan asked, sipping his drink. “I`m happy that you get to be you.”, she smiled at the blond. “I told you that Mom would react well.”, Ruby puffed. “Yeah, you were right clodhopper.” Ruby smiled proudly. “He told you?”, Sam asked her daughter. The thirteen year old nodded. “Of course he did. And I think it`s awesome. I mean common. Not only is he a superhero, an alien and a famous reporter. AND he`s basecelly a transformer. Also he`s my uncle. He`s awesome.” 

Lena could see that Aidan was trying to hide the proud grin that was forming on his face. Sam sighed. “Great, she likes your boyfriend more than me.” The Luthor laughed. “Don`t worry, she likes him better than me too.” The CO gave her a look. “I guess we never had a chance to compete with all that?” Ruby answered for Lena. “No, you didn`t. But you`re cool too.” Sam smiled. “Thanks bug.” “But still not as cool as Aidan.” The thirteen year old gave her uncle a high five. “Great, I lost my daughter to poststicker addict.”

The four of them walked into the DEO. Sam had to sign some papers that related to being discrete on Aidans condition and the fact that the Luthor and the blond were outside of the world. While Lena was looking for the paperwork, Sam started looking around the agentycy. Aidan playing with Ruby. The CO hadn`t been there since the reign incident. And from that she didn`t really have good memories. She heard punches and hard breathing coming out of one of the rooms. 

While catching a glance of what was going on in the inside she held her breath. Two woman were fighting against one another. They were both wearing boxing gloves. Sam almost stumbled when she saw the sweaty muscles of a familiar redhead. She stepped in. Alex was fighting against a taller brunette. Said woman had her hair tied back and was wearing a tanktop.   
She looked younger than the agent. Around twenty four maybe. 

On a bench sitting, Sam spotted another familiar face. Maggie was just removing her gloves. Her hair was tied back in a ponytail and she was, just like Alex, only wearing a sportsbra. A towl was rapped around her shoulders. Sam swallowed. Maggie noticed her standing there and waved at her to sit down next to her. “Hey”, Sam said. The cop gave her a famous smile with dimples. “I think we meet at a girls night. You kinda disappeared for a while.” 

Sam nodded. Slightly blushing at the friendly smile. “Yeah, I had some stuff to figure out.” She looked at the ongoing fight. “From what I heard you and Alex got back together?” Maggie redirected her gaze at the redhead. “Yeah, we`ve been married for almost a year now.” The cop looked at the taller woman. “Alex was bummed when you wrote that you wouldn`t be able to make it to the wedding.” “I really wanted to come but Ruby had gotten the flu and I didn`t want to leave her alone.” 

Maggie looked interested. “Ruby is your daughter, right?” Sam nodded. “It must be stressful to be single and working full time.” It`s actually pretty easy. When I had Ruby it was difficult but luckily I had Lena. She always supported me, allowed me to bring Ruby to the office. She was my roommate back then. She almost changed as much diapers as I did. And she still supports me. She even made me the CO of her company.” 

Maggie raised an eyebrow. “I doubt that that`s only because you`re her friend. I am fairly sure that you worked extremely hard to get to that position. From what I heard you are an amazingly strong woman.” Sam chuckled and blushed. “The strong part comes with being kyrptonian I guess.” Maggie smirked and shook her head. “No, I have a feeling. You`re stronger than you know.” 

The CO cursed the dimples of the smaller woman. God the brunette was cute. 

"You already meet Aidan?”, Maggie asked. Sam nodded. “Yeah, why?” Maggie smirked. “Question: How hot would you rate him?” Sam was confused but answered. “I mean, he`s a piece of cake. Don`t let Lena hear that. A nine?” The cop looked at her.   
“Okay, a ten.” 

Maggie laughed. “I knew it.” “Why are you asking though?”   
The brunette paused. “He`s still a bit self conscious about his appearance and I`m trying to prove to him that he can be proud.”   
Sam stared at the smaller woman. Gosh, cute and a great friend?   
She already knew that this was gonna be a crush.   
The CO sighed.   
Now Sam just had to look Alex into the eyes. That would be easy, right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, good Sam and Ruby reaction and the first Maggie/Sam interaction.  
> I`m excited to write this.  
> Have a great day:)


	38. Saying goodbye

Aidan was staring into the mirror. He was wearing black jeans, a white shirt and a leather jacket. All in all he was dressed pretty casual and what was even more important; practical. The blond was nervous. Today was the big day. Lena and he were leaving National City. The blond still hadn`t told the Luthor where they were going. He didn`t want to ruin the surprise and he was positive that Lena would be filled with joy. But the alien was still cared. 

He had only written his friends. He had only told one person there that he was trans though and the blond wasn`t sure if they had told their friends. He sighed and straightened the collar of his jacket. The blond went into the living room where Lena was sitting with their luggage. 

“How are you feeling?”, he asked. The brunette tightened her ponytail. She was wearing a similar outfit to Aidans. “A bit nervous. You still haven`t told me where we`re going. And maybe a bit sad.” She looked around. “Leaving our home and friends behind?” Aidan felt guilty. He didn`t want Lena to feel sad. “I`m sorry.”, he said, sitting down next to the CEO. The woman layed one hand on his thigh. 

“It`s alright honey. It`s important that we do that. Also it will give us some time to figure things out and maybe have some type of vacation.” Aidan hesitated to answer. If it would be a vacation was questionable. “Are you sure that you`re fine with leaving? I can go alone.” Lena smiled at him. “There is no way, that I`m going to let you alone. You know that you wouldn`t survive a week without me!”   
Aidan nodded. Fair judgement. 

"Are you ready to fly to the DEO?"  
The brunette chuckled. “Let`s go!”

At the DEO the superfriends were waiting. Aidan let down their bags. Lena was already inspecting a portal machine. “Are we supposed to go through that?” As a response Brainy, who was calibrating the coordinates nodded. “Yes, it`s twentythird century technology. It`s quiet simple but your scientist haven`t made the needed materials for any other functioning portal yet.” The CEO redirected her attention back at the group. Once again Eliza and Cat were silently talking. 

The two woman had become good friends and spent a lot of their free time with each other. Both blondes looked sadly at the younger couple. Even though Cat was hiding her emotions better and held up her façade by making snarky comments. Maggie was talking to Aidan while Alex was obviously trying not to cry. Ruby and Sam were standing aside and offered comforting words. Ruby hadn`t managed to excape Alex`s hugs since they had arrived and Maggie had already said that Alex had been very clingy since the early morning hours. J`onn was watching them from the side while James had prepared a USB-stick with pictures to give to Aidan and Lena. 

The brunette stepped to Aidans side when the portal lit up. “So, sure that you two want to do this?”, Cat asked. Aidan smiled. “Yeah” The otherwise so confident Cat Grant nodded and walked up to Aidan to hug him. Lena heard her whisper something but Lena couldn`t catch onto the exact words. When Cat let go of the blond she hugged Lena. Eliza did the same and when the two older woman were finished Lena could hear Eliza asking Cat: “Are you crying?” The Catco CEO shook her head. Even though everyone with eyes could see the red spots on her face. “I`m not.” Eliza smiled. “Softie.” Nia was the next one to say goodbye. The hug between the two was soft and sweet. 

Lena smiled She knew that Nia kind of saw not just a mentor but an older brother in Aidan. Next was Maggie who clinged onto Aidan, crying. “Since when do you cry?”, the blond asked. Maggie punched him on the shoulder. “Since you`re leaving, you big dumbass!” Lena could see tears falling of Aidans face. When the cop hugged Lena, the smaller brunett said: “You better take care of him!” “I will.” “Bring him back whole and without a scratch!” She let go of her. 

Sam was hugging Lena within a second. “You better come back very quickly!”, the CO told her. Lena laughed. “You know how long we`ll be gone.” Sam pouted. “Make at least sure that you come back save and sound!” Lena promised it and Sam gave Aidan a tight hug. Brainy said goodbye next. He was less emotional and after him James wished them a good year and gave them the USB-Stick. After him J`onn hugged the two, telling them that they better were to come back.

And after him only Alex and Ruby were left. The thirteen year old buried herself into the blonds arms. “When you come back you better take me flying!” The reporter laughed. “I promise.” The girl let go of him and now started hugging Lena. “I`ll miss you!” Lena smiled. “I`ll miss you too.” “Do you promise that when you come back you`ll let me stay over and we make a movie marathon?” The brunette nodded and shushed the girl back to her mother. 

Alex was now standing in front of Aidan. 

There was still a certain type of tension between them. “I`ll miss you Alex”, Aidan said. The redhead smiled sadly. “Me too.” She hugged him. The agent then went over to Lena to also hug her. “If he does something stupid you are allowed to ban him from seeing Disney movies.” Lena nodded. This goodbye was bittersweet. The Luthor knew that Alex still hadn`t called Aidan by his name. And she knew that the alien was aware of that. 

Brainy had already teleported their luggage and now gave them a thumbs up. The portal was ready to go. The couple looked at each other. “Ready?”, Lena asked. “Born ready.”   
They walked through the mirror like creation hand in hand. It felt weird. On one hand it kinda tickled but it also felt cold. When they arrived on the other side, Lena looked around. 

They were in a big room. In the middle of it was a big, high tech desk with computers. The surroundings were pretty sterile. A bang interrupter her thoughts. She looked into the direction the sound had come from. A group was standing there.   
All people were wearing party heats and a banner was fitted above them. 

Lena read it. “IT`S A BOY!” The Luthor laughed.   
A blond woman started to walk towards them. “Welcome on board noobs!”, she said.   
Aidan grinned. “Hey Sara.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To everyone that guessed they would be with the legends: Congrats! You were right. They`ll spent the year with the time traveling gays.  
> (It`s late here and my judgement is bad, is this chapter shit? I genuenly can`t tell. I`m tired but I wanted to write, pretty mich because I felt depressed)  
> Anyway, have a great day:)


	39. With the legends

Some time had gone by and both Aidan and Lena had started to adapt to their new surroundings. While Lena was used to having people doubt her, solely based on the fact that she was a Luthor, that was different here. The Crew of the time travelling ship was extremely accepting and she and Ava soon had found mutual grounds which were both based on their love for facts and their endless patience with their partners. 

They had started to keep a list of scores. The scores were according to how often eather Sara and Aidan rushed into danger. The girlfriend of the person that had scored the most points, was sponsored a night of drinking by the other one. Needless to say that both woman had to pay. What had to be kept in mind was, that Sara and Aidan loved to do stupid shit together. The dumber a plan for a mission was, the more likely the two were to go through with it. 

The kryptonian had come back to the ship with multiple broken bones already, which said a lot because the alien usually had skin that was made out of steel. But even though all of that was happening, Lena was having a great time. She wasn`t really doing missions on the outside but she helped to repair equipment, developed new stuff and geeked out with Ray when the crew had brought a lightsaber from a alternate dimension. Lena and Ava had to keep Sara and Aidan from trying to cut the kryptonian skin just because they had been “curious” if it would work. 

Both woman agreed that their lovers had horrible survival instincts. 

The Luthor had been aware of the fact that Aidan had died at least once but would have never guessed that Sara had died more than three times. She had just gasped at Ava started paying for their drinks. “We have exhausting lovers!”, the blonde had once said while looking up from her glass of gin. Lena had snorted and agreed. She has also started to train in self-defense after Aidan had told her that otherwise he wouldn`t let her do press conferences anymore. 

“Why wouldn`t you let her do them?”, Sara had asked. The alien had laughed and went over to the central control to pull up some articles. The assassin had looked at them and nodded. “Luthor, you need all the help you can get!” So now she was being trained in kickboxing. On good days with Ava or Ray and on bad days with Mick or Sara. 

The Luthor was also getting along with Zari and the other crew members. But the other three were deffinitelly her main anchor. And of course, Aidan. It had taken Lena some time to start thinking of the blond completely as her boyfriend but after two months she had gotten to that point. 

The alien was enjoying the time with his friends. He was becoming more confident and the Luthor was catching him smile way more often. He had changed his hairstyle and was now wearing it a bit shorter. The blond also had grown a beard. And Lena loved the elegant trim of it. But most of all she loved how affectionate the alien was. The blond was finally hugging his friends again. And while most of the crew were fine with it, Mick started growling the first time. But soon the buff man had gotten used to it and actually smiled a bit every time Aidan hugged him. (Even though he would never admit it)

Lena and Aidan had been with the legends for around seven months when the Luthor started feeling nauseous. It started in the morning and lasted about an hour. She didn`t think any of it. Maybe her hormones were a bit out of order. The brunette still went to training and helped the other legends during their missions. But when Lena woke up one morning, Aidans arms around her and she almost didn`t make it in time to puke into the toilet, the Luthor became sure that something was wrong. 

Lena still waited some days. And every morning she would hastily fell out of bed and vomited. After two weeks, the Luthor finally took a pregnancy test. While waiting for the results she listened to Sara and Aidan who were talking over their com-links. The legends were currently parked in the middle of nowhere in the 16 hundreds. 

They were complaining about their costumes. 

Lena smiled.   
Whatever the results would be, the Luthor would be fine. When the Luthor was sure that the results were ready, she closed her eyes. Was Lena really ready? For both possibilities?   
The brunette took a deep breath and looked at the stick in her hand.   
She covered her mouth.   
The test was positive.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I will be writing 2 or 3 more chapters for this story. After that I will probably start a new story and first take some time off.  
> Also, my godfather died this weekend. Which is perfect since I had planned to come out to my godmother who doen`t need this right now... Whi, does every time I want to come out to someone something happen? So that me telling them would just be a burdon? I would really like to know.  
> Anyway, here`s how Aidans hairstyle and beard look now, for those who have trouble imaginen it: https://www.google.com/url?sa=i&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.pinterest.com%2Fpin%2F777082110684334937%2F&psig=AOvVaw1fE8tK2xAqUeUPlJkXoR5q&ust=1594749369478000&source=images&cd=vfe&ved=0CAIQjRxqFwoTCLDxj8TmyuoCFQAAAAAdAAAAABAN
> 
> Have a great day:)


	40. Soft moments

Cat was pacing around Elizas house in Midvale. The two woman had a movie night planned and while Cat was very excited for that, she also was a bit nervous. She and Eliza had spent a lot of time together over the last few months. 

The oldest Danvers would stay in National City for longer periods of time in which they would get coffee and eat at fancy restaurant (even though Eliza had gotten her to drive them through a McDonalds drive through to get burgers, fries and nuggets. “Do you let Alex and Aidan get those?”, Cat had asked, warily staring at the cheap fries.  
“Not really, I`m sure they eat it anyway and they don`t really need to know.” The blonde smiled at the CEO. “I can`t believe that you have never eaten at a McDonalds!” “Well, I can buy quality food so why would I?”, Cat murmured) 

Cat ended up laughing the whole evening and actually eating. The CEO found the fries to be a bit too rickety but the nuggets were addicting. 

“So? How`s everything going in National City?”, Eliza asked when she stepped back into the living room, carrying to glass of wine. “It`s fine.”, Cat told her. “A little boring without you but I spent enough time trying to keep the kids alive that it`s always a bit adventures.” 

Eliza smiled and gestured the other woman to sit down next to her. The CEO did as ordered and let herself fall onto the soft cushion. The Danvers took the remote into her hand and opened up the different movie options. “What do you want to watch?” Cat stared at the monitor and frowned. There were a lot of options.   
But when Eliza scrolled past a certain movie she stopped the blonde. “That one.” Eliza raised an eyebrow. “The devil wears prada? Sure?” The CEO nodded. “Nia always makes jokes about that movie and I finally want to understand why!”   
The Danvers shrugged her shoulders. “That`s fine with me.” She started the movie.

Almost two hours later, Cat was still staring at the TV. With mixed feelings this time. “I liked the movie.”, Eliza stated and looked at the other woman. “You?” Cat tilted her head. “What was wrong with it?”, the Danvers asked. “Nothing.” “I know what nothing looks like and your facial expression doesn`t translate to that so what`s going on?” Cat sighed. “Okay, the jokes that Nia made were all directed onto me being like Miranda Priestley.” 

The CEO gestured at the monitor. “And now that I`ve seen the movie I`m not sure if that`s a good thing. Am I really that manipulative?” Eliza leaned closer to her and grabbed her hand.   
“Hey”, the blonde whispered softly. “It`s true, you are a little bit like Miranda.” Cat snorted. “But you`re also a lot more. You take in these reporters and you teach them how to work hard for what they want. You teach them to be goal-oriented and to be stubborn.   
But most importantly you teach them to tell the truth.   
You don`t let them write gossip or some rumors. You make them check the facts. You teach them that the world needs more honesty. And yes, you can be a little bit cold and sarcastic while you do that but that doesn`t change the fact that you what`s best for them.” 

Cats lips started to curl up a bit. “So I`m not just some soulless asshole?”   
Eliza chuckled. “Oh no, I mean, you`re an asshole. But with a soul. And that soul is definitely not cold or anything like that. It`s caring and so very warm.” The CEO looked at the blonde who was still holding her hand. She suddenly was very aware of that and a warm feeling was spreading in her chest. “How do you know?” Eliza smiled. “I know you. I saw you with the kids, I saw you helping Aidan to grow as a person. You help Nia every day and even Alex looks up to you. You had Maggie on your side from the beginning. Believe me, all those people love you very dearly and we all know that you`re just a big softy.” 

Cat frowned. “I`m not a softy!” “You cried while watching Hamilton!”   
The CEO pouted. “It was very sad!” Eliza started laughing and Cat noticed just how much her eyes started to shine. “I never said anything otherwise.” The blonde stopped laughing and let herself sink into the cushion, right next to Cat. The CEO could feel the other womans breath on her neck. She swallowed nervously. 

Cat let herself sink back too. All while Eliza was still holding her hand. “You`re cute when you get nervous.”, the Danvers said. Cat blushed. “I`m not nervous. What would I have to be nervous about?” Eliza chuckled and leaned forward. “I don`t know, you tell me.” Cat wasn`t able to answer. The CEO was too busy staring at Elizas lips. And suddenly they were on hers. Soft and warm. 

Cat noticed that Eliza was smiling into their kiss. When the two separated, Cat cleared her throat. “I just want to say, that I totally wasn`t nervous.”   
Eliza chuckled again and Cat wasn`t sure how it was allowed to have a voice like that. “Just keep telling that yourself.”   
The CEO raised an eyebrow. “I wasn`t nervous!”   
While Eliza leaned in again, she whispered. “Liar.”, and Cat stopped complaining.

In National City, three woman were sitting on the couch in comfortable silence. Maggie was cuddled up against Alex and the redhead had her head leaned onto Sams shoulder. Movie nights like this had been going on for two months now. 

The married couple would come over, they`d have dinner with Sam (Ruby was sent to a friend where she could sleep over) and then the three woman would end up on the couch. Maggie was lost deep in thought. She hadn`t been sure what it had meant when Sams voice started to feel warm to her. When the CO`s laugh started make her laugh too. When everything that Sam did started to get similar reactions to things that Alex did. 

She hadn`t noticed that after a long day at work she and Alex would lye in bed and they would call Sam. And they would talk to the other woman for any time span from thirty minutes to two hours. That the three of them started to get lunch together instead of just Maggie and Alex. And that started to trust the two other woman. That Maggie would play with the girl on her x-box while Alex and Sam were cooking. 

She hadn`t noticed and when it had become normal. 

But she didn`t want it to change. But she knew that they would have to talk about it. That they would have to figure out what it meant. But not tonight. Tonight Maggie just wanted to enjoy the presence of the two other woman. Wanted to lay her head into Alexs lap while Sams fingers were slowly massaging her scalp like last time. Maggie knew that things would change, but she had slight hopes that they would change for the better. 

It Would have been easier if Aidan had been there. She could have just talked to him. Asked the blond what all that meant. And while Aidan wouldn`t have an answer he would help her and they would end up getting a very blund answer from Nia. Maggie missed the kryptonian. Missed the way that they could joke with each other and the way they protected each other. 

She missed her best friend. 

Maggie was excited to see him and Lena again. To hear their stories and to finally be able to ask them when they would have babies.   
She missed that. She was happy with Sam and Alex, whatever that meant but Aidan and Lena were a big part of Maggies life.   
And no one could fill the whole that the two had left when they went away for a year.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some ELiza and Cat romance (What`s their shipping name? Caliza? Please tell me!)  
> And some AgentReignCop. Hope you guys liked it.  
> Have a great day:)


	41. The real winners

His fist collided with the jaw of a knight. They had Sara and him surrounded with their shiny armor that was now covered in dust. “Are you sure?”, the blonde woman asked him, them standing back to back. Aidan nodded. “Yeah, I`m sure that it`s the perfect place.” 

The assassin had one eyebrow raised while she punched another man unconscious. “But why Ireland? I mean, there are so many places in the world. You could go to Paris or really anywhere and you`d chose Ireland?” The alien chuckled while he fenced the sword of a boy that couldn`t be older than nineteen. “Well, Lena was born there and she`s always telling me about how she would love to go back.” Aidan gritted his teeth at an especially hard swing from one of the knights. “That actually kind of makes sense. What is your exact plan?”, Sara asked. 

“Well, I am planning to have a romantic picnic. Like, I`ll those cute little sandwiches that Ray always talks about and some sparkling wine to toast IF she says yes.”   
The assassin let go of a middle aged knight that she had held in a stranglehold. “IF? Let me tell you something, if Lena doesn`t say yes she`s stupid as hell. She`s also so in love with you! Of course she`ll say yes!” Aidan hit another knight in the stomach and broke the nose of a younger one. “Are you sure?”   
Sara nodded. “Of course, why would I ever lie to you?” The kryptonian chuckled. “You slept with my sister and you want to get on my good side?” 

The blonde groaned. “IT`S BEEN YEARS. Let. it. go.”   
“NEVER!” 

Sara looked at a man with his helmet still on. She gestured at Aidan.   
“Can you believe that I`m friends with him?” The guy seemed confused so Sara knocked him out. The two looked around. The knights were all lying unconsciously on the ground. Aidan freed his face from the helmet that the legends had given him. “How many did you get?” 

Sara counted the bodies. “I`m not sure but more than you.” The kryptonian grinned. “Sure about that? You were way to busy asking questions for that.” “Says the guy that is too nervous to propose to his girlfriend?” “Are you really one to talk here? From what I know you and Ava aren`t engaged yet and you`ve been together two years longer than Lena and me.”   
Sara pointed at him with her sword. “You win this round but that doesn`t mean that you punched more of them.” 

“Where are we going?”, Lena asked, standing in front of the mirror. Aidan shook his head: “No, you`ll see when we get there.” The blond got out of their chamber on the legends ship and went to the central. Nervously he watched Ava typing in coordinates. “Are we getting there in time?” 

The woman nodded. “That will be no problem.” Sara showed up next to her girlfriend and looked at the alien. “We are on a TIME TRAVELING SPACE SHIP. I`m not sure if `being there in time` is really an issue that you have to worry about.” Aidan raised one hand to let it stroke through his hair. “Guys, honest answer: How do I look?” The kryptonian wanted to dress well but not fancy enough for the Luthor to suspect anything. So he had chosen black dress pants, a white linen shirt and suspenders. It was simple but also noble, at least he hoped so. 

Ava took him in with a critical look. “You`re good. Lena will like it.” Aidan straightened his collar. “Are you sure?” “Aidan, if you didn`t have a girlfriend and I wouldn`t have one either you would totally be on my list.” She got a stern look from the woman next to her. “What? I wanted to be honest.” Aidan looked up when Lena entered the room. The brunette was wearing a light summer dress with red nuances. Her hair was in curls and on her lips was a wide smile. 

Aidan`s lips curled up when he saw her. “Hey”, he greeted her. His voice was more a whisper than anything else. Lena gave him a quick kiss before she turned around to look at the two blondes. “Now, where are we going? Aidan refused to tell me.” Sara and Ava looked at each other. “Sorry, we can`t tell you.”, Sara answered. “Oh common, please?” “Nope, can`t tell you. Have fun though. Use protection!", the assassin commented and reached for Avas hand to drag her out of the room. 

The couple was left alone and the brunette gave her boyfriend a questioning look. “Can you tell me now?” He shook his head. “I`m sorry. But you`ll see soon.”

Aidan and Lena were lying on a blanked. The sky above them was a colored in a light blue and the sun was shining brightly. Aidan had choses a spot right next to a cliff. The surroundings were very open and above the they were able to hear the seagulls. Aidan was nervously chewing on his sandwich while listening to a story that Lena was telling him. When the Luthor was finished Aidan cleared his throat. He shouldn`t be so nervous. He was a reporter god damn it. Talking to people was a big part of his job. 

Aidan wished that he could take some of his superhero strength and use it now. Lena looked at him concerned. “Is everything alright?” He nodded. “Yeah” The blonds heart was beating fast. He sat up and looked at his girlfriend. 

“Lena?” The woman was smiling at him. “Yes?” Gosh, he wished that was already the answer.   
That would mean that he already did it and he wouldn`t have to worry anymore but that would be too easy. 

“The last few years with you, have been a roller coaster. When we were just best friends we had our good and our bad times. But we were always there for each other and while we both made mistakes we figured everything out. When we finally became a couple, we promised each other to not have secrets anymore and while that didn`t exactly work out-“, Aidan thought back to the time when he hadn`t been out to her. “But we also made it through that. We have made it through a lot of stuff together and you definitely helped me to be proud of myself. To be proud of what I do. And I hope that I do the same for you.” 

The brunette nodded and slightly tilted her head. Aidan sighed and tried to calm his breath. He took her hand. It warmly rested in his. Just like it belonged exactly there. 

“We had the stages of friend, best friend and boyfriend/girlfriend. But we haven`t made it to the last stage yet. And I would love to get to that. I want to grow old with you. I want to raise our kids together, come home to each other, bother Alex and Maggie, drive my mother crazy and just take on the world together.” 

Aidan stood up to let himself sink onto one knee. The blond reached into the pocked of his pants and took out a box in a dark blue. Aidan cleaned his throat once again and redirected his gaze to the brunette. He eyes were wide and her right hand was covering her mouth. While Aidan was still nervous, now excitement was taking over and adrenalin was rushing through his veins. 

“Lena Keiran Luthor.”, he paused to smile at her. “Do you want to let me stay by your side? To be there for each other through the good and bad times? To be each others partner on karaoke night?”   
Aidan heard Lena slightly chuckle, tears already in her eyes.   
“Do you want to marry me?” 

For a moment the anxiety came back and Aidan held his breath, waiting for the answer. The grip in his hand tightened and Lena nodded.   
“Yes”   
The alien shot up in surprise. “Really?” Lena laughed and nodded again. “Yes, really!” In excitement Aidan picked up the woman and held her tight. “Aidan, WE ARE FLYING! LET ME DOWN!” The blond landed on the ground again and ruffled his hair. “Sorry, I got excited.” 

Lena smiled and traced down the lines of his beard. “I know.” She drew him in for a kiss. Aidan couldn`t stop himself from smiling. The alien trailed the ring onto the finger of his fiancé. Lena inspected it closer. It was a silver ring with a small blue crystal on top. “I also made a kryptonian engagement band but I left that one on the ship.”, Aidan blushed.   
Lena gave him another kiss. “I would love to wear it when we get back.” 

The blond sighed in relieve and crouched to search for the sparkling wine. When he found it he also had to glasses in his hand. “For celebration.” Lena stopped her fiancé before he could fill any of the liquor into the glasses. “Not necessary.” “Why?” Aidans eyebrows were drawn together, thinking if he did anything wrong. 

Lena smiled at him. “Well, alcohol doesn`t do anything for you anyway and I am not allowed to drink it at the moment.” 

The alien seemed to think. “But why-?“ Than the realiziation seemed to dawn on him. “Wait-“, Aidan looked at the brunette. “Are you-“ Lena nodded.   
The kryptonians smile widened and his eyes started to sparkle. “We are gonna be parents?”   
Lena nodded again. She stayed silent to see her fiances reaction. “I`m gonna be a dad.”, he whispered. 

A laugh loosened in his throat. “I´M GONNA BE A DAD!”, Aidan said, his voice full of joy.   
Lena smiled and watched the man she laughed be so happy. Aidan lunged forward to hug her, his head buried in her neck. Lena could feel hot tears on her skin. 

When he let her go Lena could see them glistening on his face. The Luthor wiped them away. “You`re happy?” Aidan nodded. “Yes.” He hugged her again.   
“You know that our friends will tease us endlessly when we come back?” 

The kryptonian laughed. “I don`t care. We are gonna be parents and we are going to get married.   
They can tease us all they want, we are the real winners here.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, do any of you know good lgbt+ books? (preferably trans ftm bc I never see those)
> 
> Also, THEY ARE ENGAGED AND THEY WILL BE PARENTS AND THEY ARE BOTH ALIVE!


	42. The end

The year had come to an end almost too soon. Aidan had continued to go on missions while Lena mostly stayed on the ship to help the team but also to do research. She had tried to find a solution for same sex couples to have biological children. Because otherwise her being pregnant with the reporters child surely would be questioned. It would get the attention of the press anyway but this way they would have a logical explanation which would also help a lot of couples all around the world. 

The problem was that for years scientists had tried to find a way to make it possible but no one had ever succeeded. And Lena only had five months to find anything but as Aidan reminded her multiple times, she was Lena Luthor. And Lena Luthor could do anything that she determined. And so she did it. It took some long nights of being in the labor but in the end she successfully found a solution. 

It was an already used idea of using the bone of one woman to create an “sperm cell” which later was injected into the egg. It took multiple tries but in the end the simulation was successful. The one thing that the Luthor worried about was the fact that she only could run simulations and that until now there was no one that had actually tried it but she was optimistic. 

The day of their departure had arrived and the vibe on the ship was depressed. Aidan and Lena had become a part of the team and the crew was sad to let them go. But they knew that the engaged couple had a live to get back to. But the evening before the crew had promised that they would visit more often and Sara and Ava had already claimed their title as the wine aunts. Lena had laughed when Ava drunkenly had promised to bring them a lot of books for Christmas and possibly a gun. 

When the Luthor had said that the kiddo wouldn`t hold a weapon in their hand before they turned twenty Aidan had chuckled nervously. “You know who their family will be? This kiddo will be a master of every weapon out there by their fifth birthday.” And Lena had to agree that this was the scenario that was most likely to happen. She just hoped that she would be able to keep the kid save. Aidan had already sworn to do anything to keep their family save. 

“Family is the most important thing! And I won`t let that be taken away from me.”, he had said, more serious than he usually was. Lena knew that he meant that. In the last few months the kryptonian had made it a habit of him to every time when they cuddled have at least one hand on her stomach. While the Luthor hadn`t showed for the first two months, in the third one she had started too. The first time she had looked at herself in the mirror and had seen the bump, Aidan had sat on the bed and smiled widely. The blond had been nothing but supportive. But he also had read at least ten pregnancy books and now everything that Lena was doing was watched closely. 

He had also gotten more protective. When the Luthor had hugged Nate the first time after Aidan had known, something that almost sounded like the growl of a wolf. Lena had asked him later that evening what that had been about and the alien had shyly explained that this had to do with him being kryptonian. While the kryptonians were a lot more developed, their instincs on their kids were almost animalistic. 

Aidan remembered when his aunt had been pregnant with Clark and his uncle had started to become extremely protective. Most kids on krypton had been “made” in pods but when there was a natural birth, the partner of the pregnant spouse would become very… protective. 

When Aidan and Lena were standing in front of the portal, Sara ran in one more time to hug both of them and to give the brunettes stomach one last little squeeze. “Ciao monkey”, Aidan smiled at the nickname. He took his fiancees hand and looked at her. 

“Ready to tell my mom that we`re gonna be parents?” 

Lena shook his hand. “No but we will have to tell them some time.” 

The couple walked through the portal. On the other side their family was standing, wide smiles on their faces. The last few minutes was just one big mess. Everyone was hugging everybody. When the big lump, made out of people finally separated, Eliza`s hands were covering her mouth. “You`re pregnant!” Cat was standing next to her. A grin on her face. “You`re so smart sweetie.” 

The taller blonde rolled her eyes. “You two are going to be parents!” Lena nodded, her eyes sparkling. Lena was still holding the blonds hand. Maggies eyes catched a view of the ring on Lenas finger. The cop started pointing at it. “Guys, she isn`t just pregnant! They are engaged!” Nia who had been standing next to James gaped. 

“Aidan Jeremiah Danvers! HOW COULD YOU DO THAT WHEN YOU TWO ARE OUT ON A SPACESHIP?”, Alex started yelling. Aidan laughed. “Sorry?” The redhead ignored the apology and took the engaged couple in. Hugging them once again. The kryptonian was smiling happily, Alex had said his name. 

He looked at Maggie who was leaning against Sam. Ruby was standing next to the cop, now almost taller than the brunette. He shot her a questioning look. Maggie looked back in a way that said “Later”. Aidan nodded. He was excited to hear about everything that happened. To get back to his job. To have sibling nights with Alex. The alien looked at his sister. The redhead was laughing with Lena. 

A year ago she didn`t even accept him being Aidan, now she called him by his name. The kryptonian was sure that soon they would watch movies together. Eliza and Cat seemed to have grown closer too. He didn`t know what to make of it yet but he was just excited to see both of the woman smile at each other. 

Aidan let out a breath. 

This was it. 

This was his family. 

This was the end of Karas history. 

From now on he would just be Aidan. Reporter, Superhero, brother, friend, son, fiancée and soon to be dad.   
It was the end of something but at the same time, it was also a beginning. 

The beginning of a whole new story.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... this was the last chapter.   
> I am going to start another story soon. It`ll will be called "This is us" (staying true to the theme) It will follow supercorp becoming parents and seeing the struggle of that, the public reacting to Aidan. It will also follow Alex/Maggie/Sam and how they will handle things. And of course, Cat And Eliza being supportive moms (I keep wanting to write Sam and Cat)  
> A big thanks to everyone who has read the story and keept on commenting and giving kuddos. This story was kinda personal and yeah... I`m not sure of what to say. I hope that maybe it helped some people see that there are other people out there that have similar struggles because it`s the worst when you feel like you are alone. 
> 
> Anyway, have a great day:)

**Author's Note:**

> I am writing this because I have to get this off my chest.  
> because I never really see books or fanfiction about transgender people and I really have to.  
> Because I want to see myself represented and because I have to know that I`m not alone.  
> I hope you like the story and that it maybe helps you to eather unserstand yourself better or just the comunity.  
> This will probably have multiple chapters and follow the story of the superhero.  
> I hope you have a great day:)


End file.
